You Do Not Serve Anyone By Shrinking Yourself For Love

♦◊♦ Woman, I know you have been hearing for a lifetime that you’re too much … … too needy, too loud, too opinionated, too demanding, too happy, too sad, too large, too emotional, too expressive, too whatever. So you learned to shrink yourself in countless ways, to disappear or somehow deny your true full expression as a…

The Truth is Simple (Only Your Cover-ups Are Complicated)

♦◊♦ “If I tell you the real truth about me, you won’t love me.” That single thought has driven me to madness for most of my life. It’s like having a nasty little thought-vampire living in my head with fangs like dagger straws sucking out the oxygen-rich blood that would otherwise fuel clarity in my…

Tired Of Your Partner Not ‘Enthusiastically Choosing’ You?

♦◊♦ Are you fed up with NOT being enthusiastically chosen every day in your intimate relationship? Since “Choose Her Every Day (or Leave Her)” went viral in 2015, I’ve heard from countless disheartened women (and men) all over the world about their painful experiences with intimate partners who aren’t very enthusiastic about “doing relationship” with them. I was surprised to…

Save Your Relationship by Embracing Feelings

♦◊♦ “I care about your feelings.“ That’s what my girlfriend said to me after a recent uncomfortable conversation. My first thought was, “I don’t even care about my feelings. Why should you?” As I watched myself dismiss my own feelings (I wasn’t really “fine“), that’s when I had a profound insight about how deeply “the masculine” in…

Stop This Tragic Cycle In Your Relationship

♦◊♦ (note: this happens in all relationships, straight or otherwise. It’s actually a masculine-feminine dynamic, not a man-woman dynamic.) I’ve discovered a tragic cycle in intimacy: WOMAN routinely lets man know he’s “not enough” (doesn’t feel enough; not emotional enough; not expressive enough; often combined with he can’t get it/do it right). Having no idea how to please her,…

Find a Great Relationship (by Committing to Being Single)

♦◊♦ Recently, I wrote this popular post on Facebook: I’m single. Committed single. Until life drops an exquisite woman onto my path with whom it is just undeniable to the core of my being that this is the woman I was born to create worlds with. But I get this question a lot: “Why aren’t you…