Men, This Way https://bryanreeves.com/blog/ Relationship Insight Ninja Tue, 22 Nov 2022 17:38:29 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.1.1 https://bryanreeves.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/cropped-Bryan-Reeves-Logo-Icon-Image-32x32.jpg Men, This Way https://bryanreeves.com/blog/ 32 32 Manhood, Purpose, Masculinity, Intimacy … Love? Join Bryan Reeves, Air Force Captain turned renowned author and Life/Relationship Coach, on the search for wisdom from powerful, heart-connected men and women who can show us the way to living a truly masterful life as Men. Bryan Reeves yes episodic Bryan Reeves bryan@bryanreeves.com bryan@bryanreeves.com (Bryan Reeves) Bryan Reeves Wisdom For Men (and The Women Who Love Them) Men, This Way https://bryanreeves.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/10/Men-This-Way-with-NEW-tagline-12.jpg https://bryanreeves.com/blog/ TV-PG Austin, TX Austin, TX Bi-Weekly When Men Get REAL With Themselves (and Other Men) w/ Sean Hotchkiss (083) https://bryanreeves.com/men-real-sean-hotchkiss-083/ Tue, 22 Nov 2022 15:13:36 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49234 https://bryanreeves.com/men-real-sean-hotchkiss-083/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/men-real-sean-hotchkiss-083/feed/ 0 Have you ever achieved something huge, only to feel let down soon after the triumph? Have you ever lived the life you wanted, only to wake up one day feeling disillusioned by it? Do you consistently share the raw truth of your experiences with other men? In this episode, my guest, Sean Hotchkiss, and I ... <a title="When Men Get REAL With Themselves (and Other Men) w/ Sean Hotchkiss (083)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/men-real-sean-hotchkiss-083/" aria-label="More on When Men Get REAL With Themselves (and Other Men) w/ Sean Hotchkiss (083)">Read more</a>

Have you ever achieved something huge, only to feel let down soon after the triumph?

Have you ever lived the life you wanted, only to wake up one day feeling disillusioned by it?

Do you consistently share the raw truth of your experiences with other men?


In this episode, my guest, Sean Hotchkiss, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

For nearly a decade, Sean Hotchkiss worked as a journalist filing stories and personal essays for some of the most iconic men’s publications in the world: GQ, Esquire, The Wall Street Journal, and Men’s Health

Sean was a young man living his boyhood dream, immersed in a world of luxury, fashion, celebrity, status, money, and drug-fueled parties with gorgeous women, until one day he began to wake up to an emptiness that his fast-paced and flashy lifestyle could no longer cover over. No matter how much he achieved in that world, it just wasn’t making him happy, and he was finally realizing it would never make him happy. 

Today, Sean is a men’s coach, and a writer living tucked away in a quiet desert canyon just outside of Los Angeles. His new writing project, The Naked Man, a 12-part series that you can find at nakedman.substack.com, explores the male inward journey through a deeply personal lens. 

Sean is also one of the courageous men participating in my year-long men’s coaching experience, ELEVATE 2022

In today’s episode, we talk about the sometimes painful disappointment and disillusionment that often lives just on the other side of the successes we think we most want. We talk about what a man’s journey can look like when he starts to make major shifts towards living a life more in alignment with his authentic heart, and the courage it takes to make that shift. We talk about the fear and hesitation many men feel when they first step into men’s work and start having real conversations with other men. We also talk about Sean’s experience in ELEVATE 2022, why he was the first person to sign up for this year’s cohort, why he then tried to bail out when things got uncomfortable.. what brought him back, and what he’s since gotten out of ELEVATE 2022.

Highlights/Keypoints:

(03:42) Knowing Sean Hotchkiss

(11:31) Sean’s impetus for finding a way out of his old life

(12:22) What was the stepping stone that cleaved Sean’s path and gave him new possibilities?

(18:05) Sean’s journey in Men Coaching

(29:53) The reason why Sean bailed out on Elevate

(35:34) The Naked Man: Road Map to Freedom

(36:49) How did Sean’s projects inspire him into working with men? 

(40:32) Sean’s advice for someone considering stepping into men’s work

(42:50) Five Emotions Speed Round

RESOURCES

Connect with Sean:

Website: The Naked Man

                   Sean Hotchkiss

Connect with Bryan:

****JOIN MY YEAR-LONG ELEVATE 2023 COACHING ADVENTURE & ELEVATE YOUR LIFE*** 

Link to join: Elevate 2023 – Bryan Reeves

Website: Bryan Reeves

Twitter: Bryan Reeves (@TheBryanReeves) / Twitter

Instagram: Bryan Reeves | Men, This Way (@bryanreevesinsight) • Instagram photos and videos

Links: https://lnk.bio/bryanreeves

Youtube: Bryan Reeves – YouTube

TikTok: Bryan Withrow Reeves (@bryanreevesinsight) TikTok

Facebook: Bryan Reeves

Quotes:

“Being willing to be the full spectrum of myself and to be able to take up space in a relationship with another person has been a big takeaway from this year for me.”-Sean

“Freedom is being able to just show up naked as me in all my messiness, in all my glory and not glory.” ~ Sean

“One of the things I stand for in doing men’s work is letting men know that they need my permission, but a stand for permission for men to bring the full flavors of you into our community. We need it. If I’m going to come out of my own shell, I need men who are out of their shells.” -Bryan

Teaser (60 secs):

(29:35-30:55)

I mentioned this briefly, but being willing to be the full spectrum of myself and to be able to take up space in a relationship with another person has been a big takeaway from this year for me. 

And now, a few months in, you wanted to bail from Elevate. What was going on for you? 

Back to that concept of kind of the inner turmoil I was feeling pulled my pattern in relationship again. I mean, this is perfect. It’s all just unfolding organically. But my pattern in relationship has been to stuff all those I don’t like that build up a shitload of resentment. 

Right. And then say, F*** you and walk. Right? 

Yeah. That interaction with you and Tate, when I said that I wanted to leave was so healing for me because you guys were like, first of all, you guys really owned how that experience made you feel for you. You weren’t just like, F*** this guy. 

He doesn’t want to. Be a part of it. Let him go. And I feel like I got to learn that, holy s***. I can come to the table with my needs, with these guys who are like the head honchos here. They’re the dads, in essence, right? I can come here with my needs, and we can have a conversation about it. And this isn’t a black or white thing. 

Keywords:

men, fashion, industry, elevate, naked man, coaching, coaching program, man, writer, writing

]]>
Have you ever achieved something huge, only to feel let down soon after the triumph? Have you ever lived the life you wanted, only to wake up one day feeling disillusioned by it? Do you consistently share the raw truth of your experiences with other me... Have you ever achieved something huge, only to feel let down soon after the triumph?
Have you ever lived the life you wanted, only to wake up one day feeling disillusioned by it?
Do you consistently share the raw truth of your experiences with other men?

In this episode, my guest, Sean Hotchkiss, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
For nearly a decade, Sean Hotchkiss worked as a journalist filing stories and personal essays for some of the most iconic men’s publications in the world: GQ, Esquire, The Wall Street Journal, and Men’s Health. 
Sean was a young man living his boyhood dream, immersed in a world of luxury, fashion, celebrity, status, money, and drug-fueled parties with gorgeous women, until one day he began to wake up to an emptiness that his fast-paced and flashy lifestyle could no longer cover over. No matter how much he achieved in that world, it just wasn’t making him happy, and he was finally realizing it would never make him happy. 
Today, Sean is a men’s coach, and a writer living tucked away in a quiet desert canyon just outside of Los Angeles. His new writing project, The Naked Man, a 12-part series that you can find at nakedman.substack.com, explores the male inward journey through a deeply personal lens. 
Sean is also one of the courageous men participating in my year-long men’s coaching experience, ELEVATE 2022
In today’s episode, we talk about the sometimes painful disappointment and disillusionment that often lives just on the other side of the successes we think we most want. We talk about what a man’s journey can look like when he starts to make major shifts towards living a life more in alignment with his authentic heart, and the courage it takes to make that shift. We talk about the fear and hesitation many men feel when they first step into men’s work and start having real conversations with other men. We also talk about Sean’s experience in ELEVATE 2022, why he was the first person to sign up for this year’s cohort, why he then tried to bail out when things got uncomfortable.. what brought him back, and what he’s since gotten out of ELEVATE 2022.
Highlights/Keypoints:
(03:42) Knowing Sean Hotchkiss
(11:31) Sean’s impetus for finding a way out of his old life
(12:22) What was the stepping stone that cleaved Sean’s path and gave him new possibilities?
(18:05) Sean’s journey in Men Coaching
(29:53) The reason why Sean bailed out on Elevate
(35:34) The Naked Man: Road Map to Freedom
(36:49) How did Sean’s projects inspire him into working with men? 
(40:32) Sean’s advice for someone considering stepping into men’s work
(42:50) Five Emotions Speed Round
RESOURCES
Connect with Sean:
Website: The Naked Man
                   Sean Hotchkiss
Connect with Bryan:
****JOIN MY YEAR-LONG ELEVATE 2023 COACHING ADVENTURE & ELEVATE YOUR LIFE*** 

Link to join: Elevate 2023 – Bryan Reeves
Website: Bryan Reeves
Twitter: Bryan Reeves (@TheBryanReeves) / Twitter
Instagram: Bryan Reeves | Men, This Way (@bryanreevesinsight) • Instagram photos and videos
Links: https://lnk.bio/bryanreeves
Youtube: 56:28
Find Authentic Power Thru Authentic Relationship w/ Jon Vroman (082) https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-power-jon-vroman-082/ Wed, 16 Nov 2022 11:00:48 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49225 https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-power-jon-vroman-082/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-power-jon-vroman-082/feed/ 0 Do you ever struggle to feel deeply connected to your authentic power? Could that be preventing you from being fully present in your everyday life? Could that be preventing you from having the love you deeply desire? In this episode, my guest, Jon Vroman, the Founder of Front Row Dads, and I mine these questions ... <a title="Find Authentic Power Thru Authentic Relationship w/ Jon Vroman (082)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-power-jon-vroman-082/" aria-label="More on Find Authentic Power Thru Authentic Relationship w/ Jon Vroman (082)">Read more</a>

Do you ever struggle to feel deeply connected to your authentic power?

Could that be preventing you from being fully present in your everyday life?

Could that be preventing you from having the love you deeply desire?


In this episode, my guest, Jon Vroman, the Founder of Front Row Dads, and I mine these questions for valuable insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

I’m a big fan of Jon Vroman, the man. I just met him recently at a mutual friend’s pool party, and we had occasion to drop in and talk for probably a good 90 minutes poolside, and I just knew Jon was going to be a guy I would want to know more. I love that John’s organization, Front Row Dads, which we talk about towards the end of the podcast, announces itself as a community for men who identify themselves as family men with businesses, not businessmen with families. I think that family-first orientation is a profound paradigm shift that’s deeply needed in the world, and I love that Jon has taken up the banner and is serving men who are fathers to lean more fully into family and fatherhood. While we range through a few topics in our conversation today, the core of our conversation centers around Jon’s recent trip to Burning Man, his first, and the reckoning he and his wife of 16 years had no choice but to face there, as their relationship hung in the balance. 

It’s a fascinating teaching story and essential for any man who wants to thrive not just in the relationship, but in life.

We talk about that and more. And at the end, I asked Jon Vroman what his 5 emotional triggers are… a new lightning question round I’m enjoying hearing all the different answers to, so stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way…

Highlights/Keypoints:

(13:01) A story that played a fundamental role in shaping Jon as a man

(17:13) Jon’s experience at Burning Man

(20:31) What did Jon know he was carrying that needs to be confronted or dealt with? 

(22:36) Jon’s Marriage + Tension in his relationship with Tatyana

(28:47) Is Burning Man a critical turning point for Jon?

(32:36) Reimagining relationships and connection

(34:50) Pillars of Change: Jon’s Burning Man Experience

(45:02) All About Front Row Dads

(48:08) Jon’s key  insight to keep your relationship thriving

Connect with Jon: 

Website: www.frontrowdads.com 

LinkedIn: Jon Vroman – CEO – Front Row Dads | LinkedIn

Twitter: Jon Vroman (@jonvroman) / Twitter

Connect with Bryan:

****Join my YEAR-LONG ELEVATE 2023 COACHING ADVENTURE for MEN *** 

Link to join: Elevate 2023 – Bryan Reeves

Website: Bryan Reeves

Instagram: Bryan Reeves | Men, This Way (@bryanreevesinsight) • Instagram photos and videos

Youtube: Bryan Reeves – YouTube

TikTok: Bryan Withrow Reeves (@bryanreevesinsight) TikTok

Facebook: Bryan Reeves

Episode Quotes:

Keep knowing yourself and understanding what it is you want, and what it is you don’t want. 

Consider what true alignment looks like between who you are and how you’re acting in the world, and then how you choose to flow and dance.

If you’re present to the pulse of your family, you’ll know how to lead. If you are present to the pulse of your significant partner, you will know how to sweep them off their feet. 

If you stay aware and awake to the lessons that are coming your way, then whatever you’re receiving in this now moment is perfect for you. 

Teaser (60 secs):

(20:33-21:30)

What do I know now? What I know now is that I had this energy, this push and pull energy with Tatiana where I would want so deeply to connect with her that what I now know is that showed up as anxious energy. I want to create. I want to connect. I want to make this moment with you. I want to make this legendary. I want our relationship to be incredible. I want to know every part of you. I want you to know me. I was just stacking pressure on the relationship. Like, this is what success looks like. We hold hands here. Now, I would have never said that out loud. I would have never said, I need all these things to go this way in order for there to be a happy marriage. 

That would have sounded ridiculous, but looking back, it’s kind of what was going on inside me. I was like, but this is how we need to do it, and we just spend this amount of time, and this is how marriage is supposed to look.

 

]]> Do you ever struggle to feel deeply connected to your authentic power? Could that be preventing you from being fully present in your everyday life? Could that be preventing you from having the love you deeply desire? In this episode, my guest, Do you ever struggle to feel deeply connected to your authentic power?
Could that be preventing you from being fully present in your everyday life?
Could that be preventing you from having the love you deeply desire?

In this episode, my guest, Jon Vroman, the Founder of Front Row Dads, and I mine these questions for valuable insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
I’m a big fan of Jon Vroman, the man. I just met him recently at a mutual friend’s pool party, and we had occasion to drop in and talk for probably a good 90 minutes poolside, and I just knew Jon was going to be a guy I would want to know more. I love that John’s organization, Front Row Dads, which we talk about towards the end of the podcast, announces itself as a community for men who identify themselves as family men with businesses, not businessmen with families. I think that family-first orientation is a profound paradigm shift that’s deeply needed in the world, and I love that Jon has taken up the banner and is serving men who are fathers to lean more fully into family and fatherhood. While we range through a few topics in our conversation today, the core of our conversation centers around Jon’s recent trip to Burning Man, his first, and the reckoning he and his wife of 16 years had no choice but to face there, as their relationship hung in the balance. 
It’s a fascinating teaching story and essential for any man who wants to thrive not just in the relationship, but in life.
We talk about that and more. And at the end, I asked Jon Vroman what his 5 emotional triggers are… a new lightning question round I’m enjoying hearing all the different answers to, so stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way…
Highlights/Keypoints:
(13:01) A story that played a fundamental role in shaping Jon as a man
(17:13) Jon’s experience at Burning Man
(20:31) What did Jon know he was carrying that needs to be confronted or dealt with? 
(22:36) Jon’s Marriage + Tension in his relationship with Tatyana
(28:47) Is Burning Man a critical turning point for Jon?
(32:36) Reimagining relationships and connection
(34:50) Pillars of Change: Jon’s Burning Man Experience
(45:02) All About Front Row Dads
(48:08) Jon’s key  insight to keep your relationship thriving
Connect with Jon: 
Website: www.frontrowdads.com 
LinkedIn: Jon Vroman – CEO – Front Row Dads | LinkedIn
Twitter: Jon Vroman (@jonvroman) / Twitter
Connect with Bryan:
****Join my YEAR-LONG ELEVATE 2023 COACHING ADVENTURE for MEN *** 

Link to join: Elevate 2023 – Bryan Reeves
Website: Bryan Reeves
Instagram: Bryan Reeves | Men, This Way (@bryanreevesinsight) • Instagram photos and videos
Youtube: Bryan Reeves – YouTube
TikTok: Bryan Withrow Reeves (@bryanreevesinsight) TikTok
Facebook: Bryan Reeves
Episode Quotes:
Keep knowing yourself and understanding what it is you want, and what it is you don’t want. 
Consider what true alignment looks like between who you are and how you’re acting in the world, and then how you choose to flow and dance.
If you’re present to the pulse of your family, you’ll know how to lead. If you are present to the pulse of your significant partner,]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:01:59 Honest Sex (Create Passion Thru Safety) w/ Shana James (081) https://bryanreeves.com/honest-sex-shana-james-081/ Thu, 03 Nov 2022 12:10:00 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49215 https://bryanreeves.com/honest-sex-shana-james-081/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/honest-sex-shana-james-081/feed/ 0 Are you able to have honest conversations about sex with your partner, in ways that bring you closer together rather than push you apart? If not, would you like to learn how? Do you buy into the myth of happy sex, as most men do? In this episode, my guest, Shana James … and I ... <a title="Honest Sex (Create Passion Thru Safety) w/ Shana James (081)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/honest-sex-shana-james-081/" aria-label="More on Honest Sex (Create Passion Thru Safety) w/ Shana James (081)">Read more</a>

Are you able to have honest conversations about sex with your partner, in ways that bring you closer together rather than push you apart?

If not, would you like to learn how?

Do you buy into the myth of happy sex, as most men do?


In this episode, my guest, Shana James … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

Shana James is a brilliant and insightful woman who’s been working closely with men as a relationship coach for 2 decades. She’s just come out with a new book, which caught my eye as soon as I saw it … it’s called Honest Sex: A Passionate Path to Deepen Connection and Keep Relationships Alive. The book is an honest and expansive take on how to have the emotionally and sexually satisfying relationships you desire and deserve. And today Shana and I dive into topics such as the Myth of happy sex … how to have honest conversations about sex … the shame and fear around talking about sex … how to speak about sex soon in the early dating phase with someone … and how to approach it if you’ve been burying things for decades … we also go through the common complaints of men … and women … around sex … and we dive into what sex and orgasm even are, beyond the limited ideas modern culture tends to give us … 

We talk about all that, and more.

But before we dive in … 

Men, listen up, my year-long ELEVATE 2023 Coaching Adventure for Men is almost full. We’ve only got 5 spots left. This is my third year running this year-long coaching experience, and I’ve got to tell you it is life-changing for men, to finally be surrounded by strong, like-hearted, trustable other men, including myself as your coach and facilitator for the journey, for an entire year, to know you don’t have to carry the burdens of your life alone anymore, that support is all around you … to be witnessed in all you’re carrying in your life, to be celebrated in the ways you are already succeeding, and to be challenged to up your game in the areas of life that are most important to you … well, ELEVATE 2023 is proving to be a priceless life-changing experience for men. 

If you’re ready to elevate your life in 2023, I am now accepting applications at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate. Do not delay, the life you are destined to live is waiting for you!

Alright …

Let’s dive …

RESOURCES

Shana James Website 

Shana’s Book: Honest Sex

 

]]>
Are you able to have honest conversations about sex with your partner, in ways that bring you closer together rather than push you apart? If not, would you like to learn how? Do you buy into the myth of happy sex, as most men do? In this episode, Are you able to have honest conversations about sex with your partner, in ways that bring you closer together rather than push you apart?
If not, would you like to learn how?
Do you buy into the myth of happy sex, as most men do?

In this episode, my guest, Shana James … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Shana James is a brilliant and insightful woman who’s been working closely with men as a relationship coach for 2 decades. She’s just come out with a new book, which caught my eye as soon as I saw it … it’s called Honest Sex: A Passionate Path to Deepen Connection and Keep Relationships Alive. The book is an honest and expansive take on how to have the emotionally and sexually satisfying relationships you desire and deserve. And today Shana and I dive into topics such as the Myth of happy sex … how to have honest conversations about sex … the shame and fear around talking about sex … how to speak about sex soon in the early dating phase with someone … and how to approach it if you’ve been burying things for decades … we also go through the common complaints of men … and women … around sex … and we dive into what sex and orgasm even are, beyond the limited ideas modern culture tends to give us … 
We talk about all that, and more.
But before we dive in … 
Men, listen up, my year-long ELEVATE 2023 Coaching Adventure for Men is almost full. We’ve only got 5 spots left. This is my third year running this year-long coaching experience, and I’ve got to tell you it is life-changing for men, to finally be surrounded by strong, like-hearted, trustable other men, including myself as your coach and facilitator for the journey, for an entire year, to know you don’t have to carry the burdens of your life alone anymore, that support is all around you … to be witnessed in all you’re carrying in your life, to be celebrated in the ways you are already succeeding, and to be challenged to up your game in the areas of life that are most important to you … well, ELEVATE 2023 is proving to be a priceless life-changing experience for men. 
If you’re ready to elevate your life in 2023, I am now accepting applications at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate. Do not delay, the life you are destined to live is waiting for you!
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Shana James Website 
Shana’s Book: Honest Sex
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:05:43
How Conflict (Done Well) Can Heal Men w/ Arjuna O’Neal (080) https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-men-arjuna-oneal-080/ Wed, 26 Oct 2022 15:49:40 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49208 https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-men-arjuna-oneal-080/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-men-arjuna-oneal-080/feed/ 0 Do you hate conflict? Especially with other men? Did you know that conflict can actually build trust? … But only when done well? Have you ever seen conflict done well? In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your ... <a title="How Conflict (Done Well) Can Heal Men w/ Arjuna O’Neal (080)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-men-arjuna-oneal-080/" aria-label="More on How Conflict (Done Well) Can Heal Men w/ Arjuna O’Neal (080)">Read more</a>

Do you hate conflict? Especially with other men?

Did you know that conflict can actually build trust? … But only when done well?

Have you ever seen conflict done well?


In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

Arjuna O’Neal is one of the wisest men I know. … And he and I have conflicted with each other.

You see, Arjuna and I have been in the same men’s group for going on 4 years now. And if not for this container, he and I come from such different backgrounds that we would just would not have had the opportunity to get to know each other the way we have in these past 4 years.

Arjuna grew up on the dangerous east side of Detroit, the son of a notorious drug dealer. He was also raised in the Hare Krishna sect of Hunduism. I grew up in the Washington DC suburbs of Maryland, in a community that was built to be racially integrated, but that still had it’s racial problems.

I was only 4 years old when I once called one of my black neighbors, a kid probably only 4 or 5 himself, the “n-word” … I have no idea where I heard that word or what made me think to use, but use it I did, and this kid proceeded to whoop my ass that day. Perhaps one of the best things ever happened to me! Not that I promote violence between 4 year olds. Just saying, it was a lesson I’ve never forgotten.

Our men’s group is 13-men strong, and there ain’t a pushover among us. It’s full of successful men’s coaches, talented and successful artists and community leaders, military veterans, a former police officer, a few celebrities even, we’ve got black men, white men, mixed men, asian men … conflict happens!

And yet it’s one of the things that I love most about our little crew, is because we always come through it stronger. Arjuna and I talk about that today. Arjuna shares how experiencing conflict in our group – and specifically with me – has been one of the most interesting and healing experiences of his life. I’m not bragging here … my fiesty fiery moments of unskillfulness are often what contribute to conflict arising in the first place. 

Arjuna and I have been wanting to talk about this on my podcast for some time. And I’m thrilled we finally got the chance. 

At the end of our conversation, I ask Arjuna O’Neal what are his 5 emotional triggers … this is one of my favorite parts of the interview, so definitely stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

But before we dive in … 

I am now accepting applications for ELEVATE 2023. It’s a year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving in their lives … At the time of this recording, we’ve already filled 4 of 10 available spots. So only 6 remain. But don’t worry, though, just go to https://bryanreeves.com/elevate … and fill out the application linked on that page. There may be a spot left for you in ELEVATE 2023, and if not, we’ll be happy to have a conversation with you anyway, to see how we might serve you in other ways.

RESOURCES

Arjuna’s Website: www.arjunaoneal.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/Arjuna_oneal

]]>
Do you hate conflict? Especially with other men? Did you know that conflict can actually build trust? … But only when done well? Have you ever seen conflict done well? In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for u... Do you hate conflict? Especially with other men?
Did you know that conflict can actually build trust? … But only when done well?
Have you ever seen conflict done well?

In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Arjuna O’Neal is one of the wisest men I know. … And he and I have conflicted with each other.
You see, Arjuna and I have been in the same men’s group for going on 4 years now. And if not for this container, he and I come from such different backgrounds that we would just would not have had the opportunity to get to know each other the way we have in these past 4 years.
Arjuna grew up on the dangerous east side of Detroit, the son of a notorious drug dealer. He was also raised in the Hare Krishna sect of Hunduism. I grew up in the Washington DC suburbs of Maryland, in a community that was built to be racially integrated, but that still had it’s racial problems.
I was only 4 years old when I once called one of my black neighbors, a kid probably only 4 or 5 himself, the “n-word” … I have no idea where I heard that word or what made me think to use, but use it I did, and this kid proceeded to whoop my ass that day. Perhaps one of the best things ever happened to me! Not that I promote violence between 4 year olds. Just saying, it was a lesson I’ve never forgotten.
Our men’s group is 13-men strong, and there ain’t a pushover among us. It’s full of successful men’s coaches, talented and successful artists and community leaders, military veterans, a former police officer, a few celebrities even, we’ve got black men, white men, mixed men, asian men … conflict happens!
And yet it’s one of the things that I love most about our little crew, is because we always come through it stronger. Arjuna and I talk about that today. Arjuna shares how experiencing conflict in our group – and specifically with me – has been one of the most interesting and healing experiences of his life. I’m not bragging here … my fiesty fiery moments of unskillfulness are often what contribute to conflict arising in the first place. 
Arjuna and I have been wanting to talk about this on my podcast for some time. And I’m thrilled we finally got the chance. 
At the end of our conversation, I ask Arjuna O’Neal what are his 5 emotional triggers … this is one of my favorite parts of the interview, so definitely stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
But before we dive in … 

I am now accepting applications for ELEVATE 2023. It’s a year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving in their lives … At the time of this recording, we’ve already filled 4 of 10 available spots. So only 6 remain. But don’t worry, though, just go to https://bryanreeves.com/elevate … and fill out the application linked on that page. There may be a spot left for you in ELEVATE 2023, and if not, we’ll be happy to have a conversation with you anyway, to see how we might serve you in other ways.
RESOURCES
Arjuna’s Website: www.arjunaoneal.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/Arjuna_oneal
]]>
Bryan Reeves 58:59
Are You (Consciously) Choosing How To Be A Man? w/ Johnny Elsasser (079) https://bryanreeves.com/choosing-man-johnny-elsasser-079/ Wed, 19 Oct 2022 17:31:09 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49204 https://bryanreeves.com/choosing-man-johnny-elsasser-079/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/choosing-man-johnny-elsasser-079/feed/ 0 Have you ever questioned where your definition of manhood came from? Have you ever taken time to define for yourself what it means to be a man? In this episode, my guest, Johnny Elsasser, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life. I like Johnny. ... <a title="Are You (Consciously) Choosing How To Be A Man? w/ Johnny Elsasser (079)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/choosing-man-johnny-elsasser-079/" aria-label="More on Are You (Consciously) Choosing How To Be A Man? w/ Johnny Elsasser (079)">Read more</a>

Have you ever questioned where your definition of manhood came from?

Have you ever taken time to define for yourself what it means to be a man?


In this episode, my guest, Johnny Elsasser, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

I like Johnny. I met him in person about a year ago at a mutual friend’s birthday party in Austin and instantly took a liking to him. His presence was/is infectious. Johnny served in the U.S. Army during the Iraq War in the elite 2nd Battalion 75th Ranger Regiment. So … Johnny was an Army Ranger during the Iraq War. … That’s intense …  Afterwards he spent a few years doing paramilitary work protecting US amb assadors to Iraq, and after a period of feeling lost and disoriented in the transition from always vigilant combat-ready military operator to regular ol’ civiilan life, he has since moved through those challenges to today be a leader in the men’s coaching community. He’s also the host of the podcast, The Art of Masculinity … In this episode Johnny and I talk about the challenges men go through on their journey to manhood, particularly the very process of even defining what it means to be a man. We talk about what it looks like when a man is present to his every day life, and why it matters. Johnny also shares one of his key practices that he uses to help a man stay oriented every day towards the life he is committed to living.

RESOURCES

Johnny’s website: https://www.johnnyelsasser.com/

 

ELEVATE 2023 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for enrollment. I’m only inviting 10 men to go through all of 2023 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.

Who is this for?

It is for you … IF …

  • You have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
  • You’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
  • You’re committed to rising above the distractions & compulsions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
  • You’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
  • You’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to be challenged and supported by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.

Essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every area of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, this is for you.

It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, alongside a select group of solid men going through this year with you. We’ll also meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature spot. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving more of anything, only to still feel that void that just haunts us men … it’s about each of us stepping more deeply into our courageously authentic selves, and more fully offering our gifts to our loved ones, our families, our communities, and the world, whatever that looks like for you.

If this intrigues you, get the details and apply at

➡➡➡➡   https://bryanreeves.com/elevate 

This isn’t for everyone.

But if you have an inkling it might be good for you … apply now. Just take the next step. This could be the one of the greatest gifts you ever give yourself. The gift of brotherhood with extraordinary men.

 

]]>
Have you ever questioned where your definition of manhood came from? Have you ever taken time to define for yourself what it means to be a man? In this episode, my guest, Johnny Elsasser, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make ... Have you ever questioned where your definition of manhood came from?
Have you ever taken time to define for yourself what it means to be a man?

In this episode, my guest, Johnny Elsasser, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
I like Johnny. I met him in person about a year ago at a mutual friend’s birthday party in Austin and instantly took a liking to him. His presence was/is infectious. Johnny served in the U.S. Army during the Iraq War in the elite 2nd Battalion 75th Ranger Regiment. So … Johnny was an Army Ranger during the Iraq War. … That’s intense …  Afterwards he spent a few years doing paramilitary work protecting US amb assadors to Iraq, and after a period of feeling lost and disoriented in the transition from always vigilant combat-ready military operator to regular ol’ civiilan life, he has since moved through those challenges to today be a leader in the men’s coaching community. He’s also the host of the podcast, The Art of Masculinity … In this episode Johnny and I talk about the challenges men go through on their journey to manhood, particularly the very process of even defining what it means to be a man. We talk about what it looks like when a man is present to his every day life, and why it matters. Johnny also shares one of his key practices that he uses to help a man stay oriented every day towards the life he is committed to living.
RESOURCES
Johnny’s website: https://www.johnnyelsasser.com/
 

ELEVATE 2023 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for enrollment. I’m only inviting 10 men to go through all of 2023 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.
Who is this for?
It is for you … IF …

* You have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
* You’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
* You’re committed to rising above the distractions & compulsions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
* You’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
* You’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to be challenged and supported by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.

Essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every area of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, this is for you.
It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, alongside a select group of solid men going through this year with you. We’ll also meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature spot. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving more of anything, only to still feel that void that just haunts us men … it’s about each of us stepping more deeply into our courageously authentic selves, and more fully offering our gifts to our loved ones, our families, our communities, and the world, whatever that looks like for you.
If this intrigues you, get the details and apply at
➡️➡️➡️ 1:01:40
The 3 Big Struggles Men Don’t Talk About w/ Tait Arend (078) https://bryanreeves.com/struggles-men-tait-arend-078/ Wed, 12 Oct 2022 12:00:56 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49198 https://bryanreeves.com/struggles-men-tait-arend-078/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/struggles-men-tait-arend-078/feed/ 0 What are the common struggles men face (that we don’t talk about)? What are the costs of us not talking about it? If you’re a man, are you aware that you probably don’t trust other men? Do you understand the costs of that? In this episode, my guest is Tait Arend, my lifelong childhood friend ... <a title="The 3 Big Struggles Men Don’t Talk About w/ Tait Arend (078)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/struggles-men-tait-arend-078/" aria-label="More on The 3 Big Struggles Men Don’t Talk About w/ Tait Arend (078)">Read more</a>

What are the common struggles men face (that we don’t talk about)?

What are the costs of us not talking about it?

If you’re a man, are you aware that you probably don’t trust other men? Do you understand the costs of that?


In this episode, my guest is Tait Arend, my lifelong childhood friend of 38 years, and he and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

Tait Arend is one of the most brilliant people I’ve ever known, though he would fight that characterization, because he’s also just a humble dude. He and I have been friends for 38 years, and in the last 2 years we’ve started a business together, a men’s coaching business, to help men elevate their relationships and their lives. We’ve already had almost 50 men come through our two programs, our year-long intimate, small-group ELEVATE Coaching Experience, and our new live coaching program specifically for men, Elevate Your Relationship

In our conversation today, we talk about the common struggles men face, in our lives and in our relationships, that we collectively just don’t talk about, and that cost us, and those we love, dearly … sometimes our lives. We talk about the tragic reality that most men don’t trust any other men, and the consequences of that, particularly the burden it places on our intimate relationships. We talk about the resistance men feel to doing deep inner work with other men, and the magic and transformation that inevitably happens, when men finally do cross the threshold from essentially doing life alone, to being willing to be powerfully supported by other trustable men.

So, definitely stay tuned all the way through this profound conversation, as Tait and I shed light on the challenges of men, and a path forward for overcoming them.

I want you to know that ELEVATE 2023 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for enrollment. I’m only inviting 10 men to go through all of 2023 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.

Who is this for?

It is for you … IF …

  • You have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
  • You’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
  • You’re committed to rising above the distractions & compulsions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
  • You’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
  • You’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to be challenged and supported by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.

Essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every area of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, this is for you.

It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, alongside a select group of solid men going through this year with you. We’ll also meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature spot. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving more of anything, only to still feel that void that just haunts us men … it’s about each of us stepping more deeply into our courageously authentic selves, and more fully offering our gifts to our loved ones, our families, our communities, and the world, whatever that looks like for you.

If this intrigues you, get the details and apply at

➡➡➡➡   https://bryanreeves.com/elevate 

This isn’t for everyone. 

But if you have an inkling it might be good for you … apply now. Just take the next step. This could be the one of the greatest gifts you ever give yourself. The gift of brotherhood with extraordinary men.

]]> What are the common struggles men face (that we don’t talk about)? What are the costs of us not talking about it? If you’re a man, are you aware that you probably don’t trust other men? Do you understand the costs of that? In this episode, What are the common struggles men face (that we don’t talk about)?
What are the costs of us not talking about it?
If you’re a man, are you aware that you probably don’t trust other men? Do you understand the costs of that?

In this episode, my guest is Tait Arend, my lifelong childhood friend of 38 years, and he and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Tait Arend is one of the most brilliant people I’ve ever known, though he would fight that characterization, because he’s also just a humble dude. He and I have been friends for 38 years, and in the last 2 years we’ve started a business together, a men’s coaching business, to help men elevate their relationships and their lives. We’ve already had almost 50 men come through our two programs, our year-long intimate, small-group ELEVATE Coaching Experience, and our new live coaching program specifically for men, Elevate Your Relationship
In our conversation today, we talk about the common struggles men face, in our lives and in our relationships, that we collectively just don’t talk about, and that cost us, and those we love, dearly … sometimes our lives. We talk about the tragic reality that most men don’t trust any other men, and the consequences of that, particularly the burden it places on our intimate relationships. We talk about the resistance men feel to doing deep inner work with other men, and the magic and transformation that inevitably happens, when men finally do cross the threshold from essentially doing life alone, to being willing to be powerfully supported by other trustable men.
So, definitely stay tuned all the way through this profound conversation, as Tait and I shed light on the challenges of men, and a path forward for overcoming them.

I want you to know that ELEVATE 2023 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for enrollment. I’m only inviting 10 men to go through all of 2023 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.
Who is this for?
It is for you … IF …

* You have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
* You’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
* You’re committed to rising above the distractions & compulsions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
* You’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
* You’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to be challenged and supported by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.

Essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every area of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, this is for you.
It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, alongside a select group of solid men going through this year with you. We’ll also meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature spot. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving more of anything,]]>
Bryan Reeves 53:52 The Power of a Man’s Presence w/ Allana Pratt (077) https://bryanreeves.com/power-presence-allana-pratt-077/ Wed, 05 Oct 2022 19:03:04 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49188 https://bryanreeves.com/power-presence-allana-pratt-077/#comments https://bryanreeves.com/power-presence-allana-pratt-077/feed/ 2 Welcome back to a new season and a new era, really … of MEN, THIS WAY. If you’ve been following this podcast for a while, you’ll know I haven’t released an episode in a few months. I took a hiatus because well, frankly, I just got burned out. This year has been intense. I’ve moved ... <a title="The Power of a Man’s Presence w/ Allana Pratt (077)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/power-presence-allana-pratt-077/" aria-label="More on The Power of a Man’s Presence w/ Allana Pratt (077)">Read more</a>

Welcome back to a new season and a new era, really … of MEN, THIS WAY.

If you’ve been following this podcast for a while, you’ll know I haven’t released an episode in a few months. I took a hiatus because well, frankly, I just got burned out. This year has been intense. I’ve moved across the country with my wife, and I’ve been focusing on launching, strengthening, and deepening my men’s coaching business. Podcasting just fell by the wayside. But I’m back. I’ve found a new way to do the large labors of podcasting that will work better for my pacing and disposition. I intend to crank out a lot more episodes in the coming months, and hopefully years.

And, the podcast is evolving. I’ve decided to now invite more women onto the podcast. Women clearly have much to say that we men need to hear if we are to live a meaningful life of insight and wisdom. I’ve also changed the subtitle of the podcast from, “Life Insights from Wise Men” to “Wisdom For Men (and the women who love them).” I hope it vibes with you.

My intention is still to let this space serve as a kind of watering hole we men can come to from our far corners of whatever jungles we inhabit, and be nourished together by meaningful insights and practical wisdom, so that we may return to our communities as more present, more alive, more skillful men. Because the world needs us men in our fullness, in our true greatness, perhaps more than ever before.

Speaking of which …

I want to invite you to an extraordinary adventure … ELEVATE 2023, my year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving. It begins in January, and enrollment is now open … I’ve only got space for 10 men, and already 2 men have stepped up and claimed their spots as of this recording … we’re going to fill this up soon

I’m now accepting applications for ELEVATE 2023. Go to https://bryanreeves.com/elevate … and fill out the application. There may be a spot left for you in ELEVATE 2023, and if not, we’ll be happy to have a conversation with you anyway, to see how I might serve your journey in other ways. I have another live coaching program called Elevate Your Relationship, and that might be an ideal fit for you if you’re struggling to thrive in intimate relationship.

Again … https://bryanreeves.com/elevate

Let’s dive now into today’s episode.


Has a woman ever told you she doesn’t feel connected to you? Or she doesn’t feel your present?

Have you ever wondered what she’s talking about when she says that?

Would you like to see into the mysterious experience of a woman in relationship to a man who is not present … and to a man who is?

Do you wanna know how to create presence?


Well, in this episode, my guest is the brilliant Allana Pratt. The first woman – other than my beloved wife – to appear on “Men, This Way” – now almost 80 episodes in. Allana and I mine these crucial questions – and offer you insight into a woman’s experience – to hopefully make a meaningful difference in your life.

Allana Pratt is a wise woman, and she is also an old friend of mine. We met about 10 years ago, and the first time I saw her – some mutual friends recommended we meet, and so I looked her up and found some videos of her on youtube – within seconds she had me smiling. Since then, we’ve cultivated a personal and professional friendship, and I’m honored to call her friend. Not only is she doing important work in the world, she was one of the first women in the coaching world that I saw totally crushing it on the business side, too. I knew I had a lot to learn from her.

She’s an Intimacy Expert and an Ivy League Graduate, and a regular columnist on the GoodMenProject. She’s been featured on Huffington Post, People Magazine, Forbes, CBS, ABC & FOX and more.

She’s the Author of 6 books and the host of her own edgy Podcast “Intimate Conversations” where listeners learn how to find the relationship they deserve.

Go to her website www.allanapratt.com, where she’s constantly offering online classes, in-person retreats, and coaching experiences for men, women, and couples.

Today, she and I talk about presence. What it looks like when a man is “present” … what it looks like when he is not. We talk about why it matters, and how to cultivate it. We also talk about what happens for a woman in the presence of a man who is actually present … and in the presence of a man who is not present. This is a rich conversation – with lots of presents in it – and if you are interested in creating a kick ass intimate relationship, this is a must listen episode.

So take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …
Let’s dive …

RESOURCES

Allana’s Masterclass: https://app.allanapratt.com/masterclass

]]>
Welcome back to a new season and a new era, really … of MEN, THIS WAY. If you’ve been following this podcast for a while, you’ll know I haven’t released an episode in a few months. I took a hiatus because well, frankly, I just got burned out. Welcome back to a new season and a new era, really … of MEN, THIS WAY.
If you’ve been following this podcast for a while, you’ll know I haven’t released an episode in a few months. I took a hiatus because well, frankly, I just got burned out. This year has been intense. I’ve moved across the country with my wife, and I’ve been focusing on launching, strengthening, and deepening my men’s coaching business. Podcasting just fell by the wayside. But I’m back. I’ve found a new way to do the large labors of podcasting that will work better for my pacing and disposition. I intend to crank out a lot more episodes in the coming months, and hopefully years.
And, the podcast is evolving. I’ve decided to now invite more women onto the podcast. Women clearly have much to say that we men need to hear if we are to live a meaningful life of insight and wisdom. I’ve also changed the subtitle of the podcast from, “Life Insights from Wise Men” to “Wisdom For Men (and the women who love them).” I hope it vibes with you.
My intention is still to let this space serve as a kind of watering hole we men can come to from our far corners of whatever jungles we inhabit, and be nourished together by meaningful insights and practical wisdom, so that we may return to our communities as more present, more alive, more skillful men. Because the world needs us men in our fullness, in our true greatness, perhaps more than ever before.
Speaking of which …
I want to invite you to an extraordinary adventure … ELEVATE 2023, my year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving. It begins in January, and enrollment is now open … I’ve only got space for 10 men, and already 2 men have stepped up and claimed their spots as of this recording … we’re going to fill this up soon
I’m now accepting applications for ELEVATE 2023. Go to https://bryanreeves.com/elevate … and fill out the application. There may be a spot left for you in ELEVATE 2023, and if not, we’ll be happy to have a conversation with you anyway, to see how I might serve your journey in other ways. I have another live coaching program called Elevate Your Relationship, and that might be an ideal fit for you if you’re struggling to thrive in intimate relationship.
Again … https://bryanreeves.com/elevate
Let’s dive now into today’s episode.

Has a woman ever told you she doesn’t feel connected to you? Or she doesn’t feel your present?
Have you ever wondered what she’s talking about when she says that?
Would you like to see into the mysterious experience of a woman in relationship to a man who is not present … and to a man who is?
Do you wanna know how to create presence?

Well, in this episode, my guest is the brilliant Allana Pratt. The first woman – other than my beloved wife – to appear on “Men, This Way” – now almost 80 episodes in. Allana and I mine these crucial questions – and offer you insight into a woman’s experience – to hopefully make a meaningful difference in your life.
Allana Pratt is a wise woman, and she is also an old friend of mine. We met about 10 years ago, and the first time I saw her – some mutual friends recommended we meet, and so I looked her up and found some videos of her on youtube – within seconds she had me smiling. Since then, we’ve cultivated a personal and professional friendship, and I’m honored to call her friend. Not only is she doing important work in the world, she was one of the first women in the coaching world that I saw totally crushing it on the business side, too. I knew I had a lot to learn from her.
She’s an Intimacy Expert and an Ivy League Graduate, and a regular columnist on the GoodMenProject.]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:15:12
Everything You Love (You Will Lose) w/ Francis Weller (076) https://bryanreeves.com/everything-you-love-francis-weller-076/ Thu, 24 Mar 2022 17:52:31 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49114 https://bryanreeves.com/everything-you-love-francis-weller-076/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/everything-you-love-francis-weller-076/feed/ 0 Do you regularly turn away from the sorrows of the world? Are you aware of the great cost to your vitality, your joy, by doing so? Why might it be important to regularly confront your own sorrows, even if you think you have none? In this episode, my guest, Francis Weller, and I mine these ... <a title="Everything You Love (You Will Lose) w/ Francis Weller (076)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/everything-you-love-francis-weller-076/" aria-label="More on Everything You Love (You Will Lose) w/ Francis Weller (076)">Read more</a>

Do you regularly turn away from the sorrows of the world?

Are you aware of the great cost to your vitality, your joy, by doing so?

Why might it be important to regularly confront your own sorrows, even if you think you have none?


In this episode, my guest, Francis Weller, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

Francis is the author of The Wild Edge of Sorrow, perhaps the book I recommend most these days. 

I actually featured him in a recent podcast, and honestly, if I get my way, I’m going to continue sharing our conversations in podcasts to come, like a  “conversations with a mentor” kinda thing. Because Francis Weller’s work has touched something immense in me, personally, that I believe is also vitally important for our collective humanity at this time. 

And I keep using that language when I speak about and with him, “something vast and immense in me,” because I don’t know how else to say it. 

I would say he’s written one of the most beautiful books on grief and sorrow that I’ve ever read, but the truth is, it’s just one of the most beautiful books I’ve ever read.

And when we first spoke, the conversation which I shared in a recent episode, I felt as if he was helping me finally explore that vastness inside me that previously had been largely untapped. In this episode, I describe it like a vast cavern inside me that has been blocked off, obstructed, for most of my life,  that I didn’t even know there was an entrance to, much less where to find it, and that his work on grief and sorrow is finally showing me the way, and how to unlock it. 

I would have never guessed the key would be grief and sorrow.

Death has largely spared me. So much so that I recently had a family member survive the near approach of death. And while I was naturally glad and relieved, I was shocked to find a part of me also angry. Not because I wanted this person to die, but because I have been dying to finally touch a lifetime of untouched grief.

So, I bring you again, a profound and rich conversation with the very wise, Francis Weller.

In this conversation we talk about the critical importance of regularly confronting sorrow – our own and the world’s. We talk about creating regular grief and sorrow rituals, too, which I’m personally eager to get started with. We talk about our ignorance in the face of grieving, and how we just don’t know how to do it, or how to BE with someone when they are grieving, much less BE with our own grief. 

We talk about this and so much more.

Also, I want you to know that Francis is hosting a 5-part online workshop soon on the 5 Gates of Grief. Which I highly recommend enrolling in. It’s not expensive, and I’m not being paid to promote this. I just believe in this work. 

So, take a deep breath, and stay present with Francis Weller and I, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …

Let’s dive …

RESOURCES

Duane Elgin’s Book: Choosing Earth: Humanity’s Great Transition to a Mature Planetary Civilization

Francis Weller’s Book: The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief

Francis’ Online Training: The 5 Gates of Grief Training @ Rowe Center

 

 

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Do you regularly turn away from the sorrows of the world? Are you aware of the great cost to your vitality, your joy, by doing so? Why might it be important to regularly confront your own sorrows, even if you think you have none? In this episode, Do you regularly turn away from the sorrows of the world?
Are you aware of the great cost to your vitality, your joy, by doing so?
Why might it be important to regularly confront your own sorrows, even if you think you have none?

In this episode, my guest, Francis Weller, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Francis is the author of The Wild Edge of Sorrow, perhaps the book I recommend most these days. 
I actually featured him in a recent podcast, and honestly, if I get my way, I’m going to continue sharing our conversations in podcasts to come, like a  “conversations with a mentor” kinda thing. Because Francis Weller’s work has touched something immense in me, personally, that I believe is also vitally important for our collective humanity at this time. 
And I keep using that language when I speak about and with him, “something vast and immense in me,” because I don’t know how else to say it. 
I would say he’s written one of the most beautiful books on grief and sorrow that I’ve ever read, but the truth is, it’s just one of the most beautiful books I’ve ever read.
And when we first spoke, the conversation which I shared in a recent episode, I felt as if he was helping me finally explore that vastness inside me that previously had been largely untapped. In this episode, I describe it like a vast cavern inside me that has been blocked off, obstructed, for most of my life,  that I didn’t even know there was an entrance to, much less where to find it, and that his work on grief and sorrow is finally showing me the way, and how to unlock it. 
I would have never guessed the key would be grief and sorrow.
Death has largely spared me. So much so that I recently had a family member survive the near approach of death. And while I was naturally glad and relieved, I was shocked to find a part of me also angry. Not because I wanted this person to die, but because I have been dying to finally touch a lifetime of untouched grief.
So, I bring you again, a profound and rich conversation with the very wise, Francis Weller.
In this conversation we talk about the critical importance of regularly confronting sorrow – our own and the world’s. We talk about creating regular grief and sorrow rituals, too, which I’m personally eager to get started with. We talk about our ignorance in the face of grieving, and how we just don’t know how to do it, or how to BE with someone when they are grieving, much less BE with our own grief. 
We talk about this and so much more.
Also, I want you to know that Francis is hosting a 5-part online workshop soon on the 5 Gates of Grief. Which I highly recommend enrolling in. It’s not expensive, and I’m not being paid to promote this. I just believe in this work. 
So, take a deep breath, and stay present with Francis Weller and I, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Duane Elgin’s Book: Choosing Earth: Humanity’s Great Transition to a Mature Planetary Civilization
Francis Weller’s Book: The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief
Francis’ Online Training: The 5 Gates of Grief Training @ Rowe Center
 
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:07:22
The Life of a Peaceful Warrior w/ Dan Millman (075) https://bryanreeves.com/peaceful-warrior-dan-millman-075/ Thu, 10 Mar 2022 13:00:33 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=49110 https://bryanreeves.com/peaceful-warrior-dan-millman-075/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/peaceful-warrior-dan-millman-075/feed/ 0 Could overthinking be negatively affecting your entire life? Have you ever struggled with a big decision because of differences with an intimate partner? What are the dangers of endlessly comparing yourself (and competing with) others? **CORRECTION: I misspoke in the intro. Dan is the author of “Way of the Peaceful Warrior,” not “Way of the ... <a title="The Life of a Peaceful Warrior w/ Dan Millman (075)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/peaceful-warrior-dan-millman-075/" aria-label="More on The Life of a Peaceful Warrior w/ Dan Millman (075)">Read more</a>

Could overthinking be negatively affecting your entire life?

Have you ever struggled with a big decision because of differences with an intimate partner?

What are the dangers of endlessly comparing yourself (and competing with) others?


**CORRECTION: I misspoke in the intro. Dan is the author of “Way of the Peaceful Warrior,” not “Way of the Superior Man” (that’s David Deida).

Dan Millman is a wise man. Although he’s written 17 books, it was his book “Way of the Peaceful Warrior” first published in 1980 that made him a household name in the western spiritual seeker community. I probably read his book in the late 80s, and when I was a teenager, and his beautiful gift for infusing storytelling with timeless wisdom left me with indelible images that continue to both linger in my mind’s eye, and inform my daily practice of simple, embodied mindfulness. If you’ve read the book or saw the movie, starring Nick Nolte – whom I actually got to meet in his own living room once, although he wasn’t very talkative – well you’ll remember that memorable scene in which the wise sage Socrates throws the young gymnast off a walkway bridge into the stream below – as a teaching moment showing the young man what living in the present moment can look like. It’s a great scene, and along with the scene where that same gymnast, having taken the lesson to heart, is in the shower and all his senses are focused on the water cascading onto and down his body. These two scenes have never left me, and continue to flit about my imagination occasionally when I’m walking through the woods or taking a shower. 

I’m grateful to Dan for these teaching stories, and he shares more teaching stories in our conversation today.

I invited Dan on the podcast because I loved his book, and because he’s just come out with a memoir: Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit, which I highly recommend reading. His journey through life is a fascinating one, particularly in his encounters and time spent with 4 teachers, whom he writes about in his memoir, including Bubba Free John (also known as Adi Da among many other names), a controversial spiritual teacher back in the 60s and 70s, who’s work I studied briefly on my journey into the realms of sacred sexuality. 

So I definitely recommend grabbing his new memoir, Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit. 

This is a juicy episode between two men who have both had interesting experiences through a lifetime of walking the so-called “spiritual path” … and as my wise eternal elder, I’m grateful for the lessons Dan Millman has imparted to me and others over the years through his books, and now through our conversation. 

Also, if you don’t already have it, while you’re online grabbing Dan’s memoir, I also pick up my new book, Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her): A guide for your transformational journey through the fires of love & intimacy. It’s available online everywhere, and it’s a profound read for men and women who are simply ready to thrive in love.

Finally … please do leave a review on your podcast app … this is a big endeavor and investment of time, energy, love, and money. You can support this podcast by simply leaving a solid review on whatever app you listen to podcasts on … it really does help … 

Now take a deep breath, and stay with us, through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …

Let’s dive …

RESOURCES

Dan’s Memoir & Website: Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit

 

]]>
Could overthinking be negatively affecting your entire life? Have you ever struggled with a big decision because of differences with an intimate partner? What are the dangers of endlessly comparing yourself (and competing with) others? Could overthinking be negatively affecting your entire life?
Have you ever struggled with a big decision because of differences with an intimate partner?
What are the dangers of endlessly comparing yourself (and competing with) others?

**CORRECTION: I misspoke in the intro. Dan is the author of “Way of the Peaceful Warrior,” not “Way of the Superior Man” (that’s David Deida).
Dan Millman is a wise man. Although he’s written 17 books, it was his book “Way of the Peaceful Warrior” first published in 1980 that made him a household name in the western spiritual seeker community. I probably read his book in the late 80s, and when I was a teenager, and his beautiful gift for infusing storytelling with timeless wisdom left me with indelible images that continue to both linger in my mind’s eye, and inform my daily practice of simple, embodied mindfulness. If you’ve read the book or saw the movie, starring Nick Nolte – whom I actually got to meet in his own living room once, although he wasn’t very talkative – well you’ll remember that memorable scene in which the wise sage Socrates throws the young gymnast off a walkway bridge into the stream below – as a teaching moment showing the young man what living in the present moment can look like. It’s a great scene, and along with the scene where that same gymnast, having taken the lesson to heart, is in the shower and all his senses are focused on the water cascading onto and down his body. These two scenes have never left me, and continue to flit about my imagination occasionally when I’m walking through the woods or taking a shower. 
I’m grateful to Dan for these teaching stories, and he shares more teaching stories in our conversation today.
I invited Dan on the podcast because I loved his book, and because he’s just come out with a memoir: Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit, which I highly recommend reading. His journey through life is a fascinating one, particularly in his encounters and time spent with 4 teachers, whom he writes about in his memoir, including Bubba Free John (also known as Adi Da among many other names), a controversial spiritual teacher back in the 60s and 70s, who’s work I studied briefly on my journey into the realms of sacred sexuality. 
So I definitely recommend grabbing his new memoir, Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit. 
This is a juicy episode between two men who have both had interesting experiences through a lifetime of walking the so-called “spiritual path” … and as my wise eternal elder, I’m grateful for the lessons Dan Millman has imparted to me and others over the years through his books, and now through our conversation. 
Also, if you don’t already have it, while you’re online grabbing Dan’s memoir, I also pick up my new book, Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her): A guide for your transformational journey through the fires of love & intimacy. It’s available online everywhere, and it’s a profound read for men and women who are simply ready to thrive in love.
Finally … please do leave a review on your podcast app … this is a big endeavor and investment of time, energy, love, and money. You can support this podcast by simply leaving a solid review on whatever app you listen to podcasts on … it really does help … 
Now take a deep breath, and stay with us, through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Dan’s Memoir & Website: Peaceful Heart, Warrior Spirit
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:00:48
Before We Rise, We Must First Descend w/ Francis Weller (074) https://bryanreeves.com/before-we-rise-francis-weller-073/ Thu, 16 Dec 2021 04:00:53 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48928 https://bryanreeves.com/before-we-rise-francis-weller-073/#respond https://bryanreeves.com/before-we-rise-francis-weller-073/feed/ 0 Why do men often have to hit bottom before we’re able to make meaningful changes in our lives? Could our cultural obsession with the individual self be propelling us towards our collective doom? Could learning how to properly grieve be key to our vitality, to living a rich, soul-centered life? Well, in this very special ... <a title="Before We Rise, We Must First Descend w/ Francis Weller (074)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/before-we-rise-francis-weller-073/" aria-label="More on Before We Rise, We Must First Descend w/ Francis Weller (074)">Read more</a>

Why do men often have to hit bottom before we’re able to make meaningful changes in our lives?

Could our cultural obsession with the individual self be propelling us towards our collective doom?

Could learning how to properly grieve be key to our vitality, to living a rich, soul-centered life?


Well, in this very special episode, my guest Francis Weller, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.

And this is a very special episode. For about the last year, I’ve been diving down the Francis Weller rabbit hole, and if you haven’t yet, I’m telling you, you need to. Humanity needs you to. This man is a medicine carrier for humanity.

I first discovered him a year ago when a good friend of mine turned me onto his book,

The Wild Edge of Sorrow. That book is the one of the most beautiful, poignant, rich and instructive books I’ve ever read. Now, it’s not merely a book about grieving in the way we traditionally think of grieving in our western culture, as if grieving is something that only happens when we experience a major and obvious loss in our lives – which by the way, we don’t even do that well in our culture – but Francis’ book is about ways of creating soul renewal by recasting grieving in our culture as essential routine practice to ensure not just our individual health and well-being, but the health and well-being of our entire community, and of the planet itself.

Francis’ work is immense.

In a world of many olders but too few elders, particularly elder men, Francis Weller is a true wise elder. And he’s super easy to talk with. For more than 30 years he’s been a psychotherapist, a writer, and soul-activist. He is a master of synthesizing diverse streams of thought, from psychology, anthropology, mythology, alchemy, indigenous cultures, and poetic traditions. The core of his work is creating pathways to reclaiming our indigenous soul, what psychologist Carl Jung called the “unforgotten wisdom” that resides in the heart of the psyche. He’s the founder of WisdomBridge, an organization that offers educational programs that seek to integrate the wisdom from traditional cultures with the insights and knowledge gathered from Western Cultures. I’m so excited for you to hear our conversation.

Before we dive in, I want to tell you that ELEVATE 2022, my year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving, has just 3 spots left as of this recording. 

We begin in January, right around the corner.

So, if you’re a man interested in stepping into a powerful brotherhood of men, alongside me and 12 other like-hearted men, please apply now @ https://bryanreeves.com/elevate

ELEVATE 2022 includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, and alongside a select group of solid men, your soon-to-be brothers, we’ll go on a deep-dive into the insights, distinctions, and practices that allow you to step into your deepest life purpose, create and support a thriving intimate relationship, tap into real, authentic heart-centered power to truly serve your loved ones, your aspirations, your community. We’ll also meet in person for an epic 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature location in North Carolina.

Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life, and you will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone. Because you surely know by now that if you’re going to touch the heart of what matters most to you in life, you ain’t gonna get there by staying comfortable.

This isn’t for everyone.

But if you have an inkling it might be for you … apply now … Just take the next step. This could be the one of the greatest gifts you ever give yourself. The gift of brotherhood with extraordinary men.

➡➡➡➡ bryanreeves.com/elevate

Alright, back to my conversation with Francis Weller.

Now, I think I may talk a bit too much in the beginning of this episode with Francis, but I think that’s what sometimes happens when I’m in the presence of a true elder, and I’ve long felt unseen by any true elders.

Anyway, take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to the end of this beautiful and profound episode of Men, This Way …

Alright …

Let’s dive …

RESOURCES

Francis’ Profound Book: The Wild Edge of Sorrow

Francis Official Website

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

]]>
Why do men often have to hit bottom before we’re able to make meaningful changes in our lives? Could our cultural obsession with the individual self be propelling us towards our collective doom? Could learning how to properly grieve be key to our vital... Why do men often have to hit bottom before we’re able to make meaningful changes in our lives?
Could our cultural obsession with the individual self be propelling us towards our collective doom?
Could learning how to properly grieve be key to our vitality, to living a rich, soul-centered life?

Well, in this very special episode, my guest Francis Weller, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
And this is a very special episode. For about the last year, I’ve been diving down the Francis Weller rabbit hole, and if you haven’t yet, I’m telling you, you need to. Humanity needs you to. This man is a medicine carrier for humanity.
I first discovered him a year ago when a good friend of mine turned me onto his book,
The Wild Edge of Sorrow. That book is the one of the most beautiful, poignant, rich and instructive books I’ve ever read. Now, it’s not merely a book about grieving in the way we traditionally think of grieving in our western culture, as if grieving is something that only happens when we experience a major and obvious loss in our lives – which by the way, we don’t even do that well in our culture – but Francis’ book is about ways of creating soul renewal by recasting grieving in our culture as essential routine practice to ensure not just our individual health and well-being, but the health and well-being of our entire community, and of the planet itself.
Francis’ work is immense.
In a world of many olders but too few elders, particularly elder men, Francis Weller is a true wise elder. And he’s super easy to talk with. For more than 30 years he’s been a psychotherapist, a writer, and soul-activist. He is a master of synthesizing diverse streams of thought, from psychology, anthropology, mythology, alchemy, indigenous cultures, and poetic traditions. The core of his work is creating pathways to reclaiming our indigenous soul, what psychologist Carl Jung called the “unforgotten wisdom” that resides in the heart of the psyche. He’s the founder of WisdomBridge, an organization that offers educational programs that seek to integrate the wisdom from traditional cultures with the insights and knowledge gathered from Western Cultures. I’m so excited for you to hear our conversation.
Before we dive in, I want to tell you that ELEVATE 2022, my year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving, has just 3 spots left as of this recording. 
We begin in January, right around the corner.
So, if you’re a man interested in stepping into a powerful brotherhood of men, alongside me and 12 other like-hearted men, please apply now @ https://bryanreeves.com/elevate
ELEVATE 2022 includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, and alongside a select group of solid men, your soon-to-be brothers, we’ll go on a deep-dive into the insights, distinctions, and practices that allow you to step into your deepest life purpose, create and support a thriving intimate relationship, tap into real, authentic heart-centered power to truly serve your loved ones, your aspirations, your community. We’ll also meet in person for an epic 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature location in North Carolina.
Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life, and you will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone. Because you surely know by now that if you’re going to touch the heart of what matters most to you in life, you ain’t gonna get there by staying comfortable.
This isn’t for everyone.
But if you have an inkling it might be for you … apply now … Just take the next step. This could be the one of the greatest gifts you ever give yourself. The gift of brotherhood with extraordinary men.
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:17:39
The 5 Pillars of A Thriving Man (073) https://bryanreeves.com/5-pillars-thriving-man-073/ Thu, 25 Nov 2021 00:52:24 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48923 Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives? What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”? What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life? In this episode, I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life. ... <a title="The 5 Pillars of A Thriving Man (073)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/5-pillars-thriving-man-073/" aria-label="More on The 5 Pillars of A Thriving Man (073)">Read more</a> Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives? What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”? What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life? In this episode, Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives?
What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”?
What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life?

In this episode, I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Because in this episode, I’m going to dive into the 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man.
These 5 pillars came to me a few years ago on a cabin retreat in the mountains with my oldest friend, Tait. We’d traveled up a windy road to a gorgeous mountain area 90 minutes northeast of Los Angeles known as Lake Arrowhead, to do some deep reflection together on our lives. We were both maybe 43 at the time, living on opposite coasts, he in North Carolina and I in California, both partnered to amazing women, both doing meaningful work with significant positive impact on countless people’s lives, and yet somehow we were also both awakening to deep pangs of loneliness. 
So we went up to this cabin with my canine companion, Yellowjhan, for a weekend of food, fire, laughter, and reflection. 
What I didn’t expect was that my stepping more fully into leading men’s work, and this podcast, “Men, This Way,” would be born out of that weekend. What I didn’t expect was that just a few years later, Tait and I would be stepping up together to launch a year-long coaching journey for men called, ELEVATE 2021 … which we are now wrapping up with the 10 courageous men who joined us on that incredible adventure this past year, and we are now already into booking ELEVATE 2022 … and we’ve already got 7 men enrolled for that with just 5 spots left! 
So actually, I’ll tell you more about this, because the adventure begins soon, and indeed without doing any advertising for it, we’re already down to only 5 spots left at the time of recording this … 
So here it is … If you’re a man committed to thriving in every domain of your life, I invite you on a year-long journey to make 2022 an extraordinary year. Whether you want to make a massive shift in your professional life, connect to and truly live your deepest purpose every day, or maybe you want to improve the quality of your intimate relationship experiences, or learn to be more present with your family, or perhaps you’re simply ready to make profound shifts in how you show up for yourself, for your own deep well-being.
Whatever specific dreams or goals or intentions or desires you’re shooting for, what I’m inviting you into is an adventure that can help you achieve it, by transforming your relationship with yourself. Because you should know, the only thing keeping you from experiencing the freedom in life you crave … is you.
Here’s the opportunity: I’m inviting only 12 men to coach with me for an entire year – which includes personal coaching and an intimate men’s group experience with the other 11 men going through this year alongside you. These men, perhaps including you, I am ultimately selecting. I want this to be a curated group of men that I myself would be excited to spend the year with … because that’s exactly what I’ll be doing, spending this entire year with you. We’ll also all meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature location in June. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be both challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and celebrated as you step more fully into offering your soul-gifts to the world, whatever that looks like for you. Also, best part, I think, is it includes consistent on-demand video access throughout the year to me and this exclusive brotherhood.
If this sounds intriguing to you, the details are at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate 
If you’re wondering what this will cost, I assure you,]]>
Bryan Reeves The 5 Pillars of A Thriving Man (073) 1:02:01
Letting Go (When The World is Falling Apart) w/ Peter Russell (072) https://bryanreeves.com/letting-go-peter-russell-072/ Sat, 20 Nov 2021 08:30:28 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48917 How do you practice “letting go”? What does “letting go” even really mean? Can you “let go” AND still take powerful, effective action? In this episode, my guest, the brilliant and wise author, teacher, lecturer, sage, Peter Russell, and I mine these questions and more to help make a meaningful difference in your life. Peter ... <a title="Letting Go (When The World is Falling Apart) w/ Peter Russell (072)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/letting-go-peter-russell-072/" aria-label="More on Letting Go (When The World is Falling Apart) w/ Peter Russell (072)">Read more</a> How do you practice “letting go”? What does “letting go” even really mean? Can you “let go” AND still take powerful, effective action? In this episode, my guest, the brilliant and wise author, teacher, lecturer, sage, Peter Russell, How do you practice “letting go”?
What does “letting go” even really mean?
Can you “let go” AND still take powerful, effective action?

In this episode, my guest, the brilliant and wise author, teacher, lecturer, sage, Peter Russell, and I mine these questions and more to help make a meaningful difference in your life.
Peter Russell is indeed a wise, wise man. …
In a world devoid of true elders, Peter is a true elder. Back in the 80s, Peter became renown for speaking this term “The Global Brain” into the cultural zeitgeist of the day, with his bestselling book of that name, the Global Brain. In that book way back in the 80s, Peter predicted the creation of the internet and the impact it would have on humanity … and I certainly ask him about the state of humanity today.
In fact, in today’s episode we’re talking about the practice of “Letting Go.” It’s the subject of his new book, “Letting go of Nothing” and it’s something I’ve been in the intentional practice of learning how to do for many many years … and still I hold on like hell constantly! Daily!
So we talk about what it really means to let go, in a world full of things that hook and stress our minds, and challenge us daily, and I ask Peter perhaps one of the most important questions I’ve ever asked a guest: … if you were President of the USA today, how would you do your job and STILL practice letting go. And I love his answer. Stay tuned for it.
Peter earned degrees in theoretical physics, psychology, and computer science at the University of Cambridge in England, where he studied for a time with Stephen Hawking. 
At Cambridge University (UK), he became increasingly fascinated by the mysteries of the human mind, which led him to travel to India to study meditation and eastern philosophy. When he came back he took up the first research post ever offered in Britain on the psychology of meditation.
Peter is indeed an incredible man with a life interestingly lived … 
I’m super excited to have Peter on the podcast today, and I’m confident you’ll be deeply inspired by our conversation as well.
Now, take a deep breath, and stay present with me, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:10:58
How Healthy Relationships Do Conflict w/ Jayson Gaddis (071) https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-w-jayson-gaddis-072/ Fri, 22 Oct 2021 19:25:51 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48900 What did your father teach you about conflict? What does conflict look like in healthy relationships? Do healthy couples regularly experience conflict? And if so, how do they do it? In this episode, my guest, relationship expert Jayson Gaddis, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in ... <a title="How Healthy Relationships Do Conflict w/ Jayson Gaddis (071)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/conflict-w-jayson-gaddis-072/" aria-label="More on How Healthy Relationships Do Conflict w/ Jayson Gaddis (071)">Read more</a> What did your father teach you about conflict? What does conflict look like in healthy relationships? Do healthy couples regularly experience conflict? And if so, how do they do it? In this episode, my guest, relationship expert Jayson Gaddis, What did your father teach you about conflict?
What does conflict look like in healthy relationships?
Do healthy couples regularly experience conflict? And if so, how do they do it?

In this episode, my guest, relationship expert Jayson Gaddis, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
This is the second time I’ve had Jayson on Men, This Way, and I love having Jayson on because he brings such practical insight and wisdom, actionable practices you can begin to start working with immediately in your life, and he does not disappoint in this episode as well, particularly if you’re experiencing, or ever experienced, conflict in an important relationship. Jayson just released his new book titled, “Getting To Zero: How to Work Through Conflict in your High Stakes Relationships.”
Some of the topics we dive into are, The 5 types of conflict that emerge in relationships, the basic building blocks of resolving conflict, what it can look like for a (strong-willed) couple to navigate the routine disagreements and differences that arise in the course of living together, as well as what our fathers taught us about conflict, whether they spoke it directly or just modeled it through their being. We talk about all that and more ,,, 
But first, I want you to know that ELEVATE 2022 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for enrollment. I’m only inviting 12 men to go through all of 2022 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.

Who is this for?
It is for you … IF … you have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
Or you’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
This is for you If you’re committed to rising above the distractions & compulsions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
If you’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
If you’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to be challenged and supported by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.
I mean, essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every area of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, ELEVATE 2022 is for you.
It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year. And alongside a select group of solid men, your soon-to-be brothers, we’ll go on a deep-dive into the insights, distinctions, and practices that allow you to step into your deepest life purpose, create and support a thriving intimate relationship, tap into real, authentic power to truly serve your life, your loved ones, your professional aspirations, your community, and more. We’ll also have an epic in-person experience on a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature location.
Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving more of anything, only to still feel that void that just haunts us men … it’s about each of us stepping more deeply into our courageously authentic selves, and more fully offering our gifts to the world.
If this intrigues you, get the details and apply at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate
This isn’t for everyone.
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Bryan Reeves 52:12
Men & Emotions w/ Mark Groves (070) https://bryanreeves.com/men-emotions-mark-groves-070/ Wed, 29 Sep 2021 08:00:29 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48893 Are you constantly trying to make your partner more like you? (i.e. less emotional, more rational, etc.) Are you constantly getting stuck over your differences? Do you struggle to really feel your feelings? In this episode, I’m talking with my old friend, Mark Groves, founder of “Create The Love” a massively successful Instagram Page and ... <a title="Men & Emotions w/ Mark Groves (070)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/men-emotions-mark-groves-070/" aria-label="More on Men & Emotions w/ Mark Groves (070)">Read more</a> Are you constantly trying to make your partner more like you? (i.e. less emotional, more rational, etc.) Are you constantly getting stuck over your differences? Do you struggle to really feel your feelings? In this episode, Are you constantly trying to make your partner more like you? (i.e. less emotional, more rational, etc.)
Are you constantly getting stuck over your differences?
Do you struggle to really feel your feelings?

In this episode, I’m talking with my old friend, Mark Groves, founder of “Create The Love” a massively successful Instagram Page and Community dedicated to helping people create inspired and inspiring relationships. This is actually a rebroadcast of an episode Mark and I did on HIS podcast, cleverly titled “The Mark Groves” Podcast, which I highly recommend you check out.
I just love my conversations with Mark, and in this episode we explore the themes of Male emotions, Masculine vs feminine communication, Anxious attachment, Breakups. We talk about how we men were traditionally expected to show up in relationships, and particularly how that sets us up to fail in today’s relationships. We also talk about what men AND women can do to take responsibility for how we communicate with each other and dive a bit into my new book “Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her” as well … all that and more.
But first, I want you to know that ELEVATE 2022 – My year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving in every domain of life – is now open for early-bird enrollment. I’m only inviting 12 men to go through all of 2022 with me, personally, on this adventure of a lifetime.
Who is this for? 
It is for you … IF … you have achieved some level of success … yet still feel unfulfilled.
Or you you’re simply seeking a greater level of fulfillment than you now have.
This is for you If you’re committed to rising above the distractions & addictions that are sabotaging you from living your fullness as a man
If you’re done trying to lone-wolf it through life … this is for you.
If you’re stuck in some critical area … and ready for a breakthrough, or you know you need to challenged by other men, to help move you along on the journey of becoming the Man you were born to be … this is for you.
Essentially, this is for you if you are committed to thriving in every domain of your life. If you are a man who knows there is more beauty, more depth, more satisfaction, more fulfillment, more truth, to be experienced, than what you are currently experiencing, this is for you.
It includes personal coaching with me throughout the entire year, alongside an intimate group of solid men going through this year with you. These men I am ultimately selecting, so it will be a curated group of men that I myself will be excited to spend the year with … because that’s exactly what I’m doing, spending this entire year with you. We’ll meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature spot. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and you will be celebrated when you succeed, or even when you fail but you did the thing you were afraid of. Because this experience isn’t just about making more money or having more sex or achieving anything in particular … it’s about each of us stepping more deeply into our courageously authentic selves, and more fully offering our soul-gifts to our loved ones, our families, our communities, and the world, whatever that looks like for you. 
If this intrigues you, get the details and apply at https://bryanreeves.com/elevate
This isn’t for everyone. 
But if you have an inkling it might be good for you … apply now. Just take the next step. This could be the one of the greatest gifts you ever give yourself. The gift of brotherhood with extraordinary men.
Make today the day you commit to making 2022 extraordinary.
Go to 1:06:39
Radical Responsibility as a Path to Wisdom w/ Dr. Fleet Maull (069) https://bryanreeves.com/fleet-maull-069/ Thu, 16 Sep 2021 22:34:04 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48888 In this episode: Dr. Maull and I talk about his prison experience as a convicted drug “Kingpin”; what happened with his son both during and after his prison experience; about the importance of emotional intelligence as a foundation for healthy relationships; the need for men to gather with other men in doing essential personal growth ... <a title="Radical Responsibility as a Path to Wisdom w/ Dr. Fleet Maull (069)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/fleet-maull-069/" aria-label="More on Radical Responsibility as a Path to Wisdom w/ Dr. Fleet Maull (069)">Read more</a> In this episode: Dr. Maull and I talk about his prison experience as a convicted drug “Kingpin”; what happened with his son both during and after his prison experience; about the importance of emotional intelligence as a foundation for healthy relation...
My guest today is Dr. Fleet Maull.
Dr. Maull is truly a wise man. Because he is a true elder. In a world of too few true elders.
What really hooked me on his work was the fact that he spent 14 years in a federal prison on drug trafficking charges – he was actually convicted under the so-called “KingPin statute” by the government in 1985, and sentenced to 30 years without parole, when he was just 35 years of age. 
In our conversation today, Dr. Maull takes us into that experience, and how it impacted and shaped him as a man, and also how it created a foundation for his life’s work. Because he didn’t just go to prison. In prison, he soon resolved to not let that be the end of his life, and with his pre-existing Buddhist practice as an orienting light, he set himself upon a path of profound service to humanity. 
In both deepening his own meditation practice, and now teaching meditation and mindfulness to other prisoners, as well, he would eventually go on to found the
Prison Mindfulness Institute and the National Prison Hospice Association. Later he also became the co-founder of other service organizations like the Engaged Mindfulness Institute, the Transforming Justice Initiative, the Rwanda Bearing Witness Retreat & Peace Initiative, and the Center for Contemplative End-of-Life Care at Naropa University. He currently serves as the CEO and Director of Training, Research & Development for Prison Mindfulness Institute, Center for Mindfulness in Public Safety and the Engaged Mindfulness Institute, as well as CEO and senior trainer for Windhorse Seminars & Consulting.
The book I have of his, which we’ll dive into a little bit today, is Radical Responsibility, “How to move Beyond blame, fearlessly live your highest purpose, and become an Unstoppable Force for good” 
Dr. Maull and I talk about his prison experience, what happened with his son both during and after his prison experience, we talk about the important of emotional intelligence as a foundation for healthy relationships, as well as the need for men to gather with other men in doing essential personal growth work, in facing and integrating our shadows so that we don’t sabotage ourselves and the world with harmful, immature behavior.
Speaking of which … it’s a bit early to be announcing this, but ELEVATE 2022 – a year-long coaching journey for men committed to thriving – well, we are now opening up applications for consideration. We are limiting this to just 12 men, and we’ve already filled our first spot without even announcing it yet!
Consider joining me for the adventure of a lifetime throughout all of 2022, and make 2021 extraordinary. And I mean extraordinary … because this is the most exciting experience I’ve yet created specifically for men. 
It includes personal coaching with me, and also an intimate men’s group experience with the other men going through this year alongside you. These men, which might include you, I am ultimately selecting. It will be a curated group of men that I myself will be excited to spend the year with … because that’s exactly what I’m doing,]]> Bryan Reeves 58:51 No Accountability, No Greatness w/ Tayo Rockson (068) https://bryanreeves.com/accountability-tayo-rockson-068/ Thu, 12 Aug 2021 08:04:27 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48846 Are you living inside of stressful stories that don’t serve your life? Why should you be aware of the emotional triggers in your body? Do you know what your core values are? In this episode, my guest is Tayo Rockson. Tayo Rockson is a man whose work I’m just beginning to learn about. He’s been ... <a title="No Accountability, No Greatness w/ Tayo Rockson (068)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/accountability-tayo-rockson-068/" aria-label="More on No Accountability, No Greatness w/ Tayo Rockson (068)">Read more</a> Are you living inside of stressful stories that don’t serve your life? Why should you be aware of the emotional triggers in your body? Do you know what your core values are? In this episode, my guest is Tayo Rockson. Are you living inside of stressful stories that don’t serve your life?
Why should you be aware of the emotional triggers in your body?
Do you know what your core values are?

In this episode, my guest is Tayo Rockson.
Tayo Rockson is a man whose work I’m just beginning to learn about. He’s been a podcast host since 2014 – which I was very impressed to learn about – but more than that, I admire his work as a co-founder at UYD Management (which I believe stands for Use Your Differences) – a strategic consulting firm that empowers organizations to incorporate sustainable diversity and inclusion practices.
Now, those are interesting words – diversity and inclusion – that in our currently polarized society can trigger a variety of responses depending on the listener, from appreciation and gratitude to resistance and anger to just pure indifference. But that’s what makes Tayo’s work so important. 
We are clearly living in a time when the differences between people are being increasingly highlighted and blown up in ways that are leading to actual violence. 
So learning how to navigate our differences, in ways that preserve partnership, is essential. If we genuinely want to live in a world where we all get to feel safe, nourished, and supported to live good lives. 
Seems to me that’s what Tayo’s work is all about, and why I invited him onto Men, This Way.
As the son of a diplomat, Tayo grew up immersed in the nuances of multicultural diversity by living on four different continents. He’s since become a world renowned speaker, and he’s the author of Use Your Difference To Make A Difference: How to Connect and Communicate in a Cross-Cultural World.” In 2020, he launched the national anti-racism campaign called #LetsTalkBias.
In our conversation today, Tayo and I explore a life journey that began for him with a near-death car accident at age 22. We talk about strategies for bridging painful differences with the people we love. We talk about the value and practice of courage.
We talk about all that, and more. 
One more thing, my new book, “CHOOSE HER EVERYDAY OR LEAVE HER” recently hit #12 on Amazon in the Dating genre. Overnight it shot up from 59,000th in all sales to 1600th in all sales. Now, I have no idea what any of that really means, except that it means people are buying it and reading it and word is spreading and they’re getting real value out of it … “Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her” – essential reading for any man or woman who genuinely wants to thrive in intimacy. Go get it online wherever you buy your books.
Take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to Tayo’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Tayo Rockson Official Website
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Bryan Reeves 1:08:05
Don’t Overthink It w/ Sylvester McNutt III (067) https://bryanreeves.com/overthink-sylvester-mcnutt-067/ Thu, 29 Jul 2021 22:02:20 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48839 Are you addicted to overthinking? (like I am) How do you know what to say yes to, or no to? Do you understand the essential importance of being in a men’s group? In this episode, my guest is author Sylvester McNutt III. I loved this conversation with Sylvester. In fact, this conversation felt more like ... <a title="Don’t Overthink It w/ Sylvester McNutt III (067)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/overthink-sylvester-mcnutt-067/" aria-label="More on Don’t Overthink It w/ Sylvester McNutt III (067)">Read more</a> Are you addicted to overthinking? (like I am) How do you know what to say yes to, or no to? Do you understand the essential importance of being in a men’s group? In this episode, my guest is author Sylvester McNutt III. Are you addicted to overthinking? (like I am)
How do you know what to say yes to, or no to?
Do you understand the essential importance of being in a men’s group?

In this episode, my guest is author Sylvester McNutt III.
I loved this conversation with Sylvester. In fact, this conversation felt more like a meditation for me, personally. My lady Silvy Khoucasian turned me on to Sylvester’s work – she cautioned me, you and Sylvester are gonna get along swimmingly – and he’s a deep soul, and you’re both gonna wanna go deep. And she was right. 
Sylvester is a mega selling author of 8 books – and I know this because his books have thousands of reviews on Amazon – inspiring titles such as Lust For Life (Oct. 2017) Care Package: A Path To Deep Healing (Jun 2018) Free Your Energy:The Path to Freedom, Mental Clarity, and a Life of Enjoyment  (May 2019), and more.
Our conversation covered a healthy swath of topics, from overthinking to the importance of forgiving our fathers to the masculine joy of doing nothing (which is what meditation CAN be if we allow it), to how we can listen to the body’s wisdom to determine what to say yes to, and no to, and much more. 
Note: One thing podcasters often do is remove all spaces from an interview. Because we want to make sure you’re attention isn’t given an opportunity to get bored. But I’m a bit thoughtful about that and allow some space, as in this interview when Sylvester would pause for a few seconds after I asked him a question, he’d close his eyes and let inspiration speak through him. I respect that. I like that. I think it can make for a truly inspired conversation, and so when there’s silence in this interview for a few seconds, don’t check to see if it stopped playing; just enjoy the silence, and the wisdom that comes with it. 
So definitely stay tuned all the way through to Sylvester’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
One more thing, my new book, “CHOOSE HER EVERYDAY OR LEAVE HER” recently hit #12 on Amazon in the Dating genre. Overnight it shot up from 59,000th in all sales to 1600th in all sales. Now, I have no idea what any of that really means, except that it means people are buying it and reading it and word is spreading and they’re getting real value out of it … “Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her” – essential reading for any man or woman who genuinely wants to thrive in intimacy. Go get it online wherever you buy your books.
Take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Sylvester’s Official Website
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:20:13
When Men Don’t Grow Up … Everyone Suffers (066) https://bryanreeves.com/when-men-dont-grow-066/ Thu, 17 Jun 2021 05:00:21 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48815 Do you prefer the fantasy of relationship to the reality of it? Does relationship seem like an ongoing problem (you have yet to solve)? Could it be that …. we men have been set up to fail in love? Recently, I got an excited call from one of my closest friends. Tait. Tait is actually ... <a title="When Men Don’t Grow Up … Everyone Suffers (066)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/when-men-dont-grow-066/" aria-label="More on When Men Don’t Grow Up … Everyone Suffers (066)">Read more</a> Do you prefer the fantasy of relationship to the reality of it? Does relationship seem like an ongoing problem (you have yet to solve)? Could it be that …. we men have been set up to fail in love? Recently, Do you prefer the fantasy of relationship to the reality of it?
Does relationship seem like an ongoing problem (you have yet to solve)?
Could it be that …. we men have been set up to fail in love?

Recently, I got an excited call from one of my closest friends. Tait. Tait is actually the man with whom I am currently co-leading “Elevate 2021” the coaching journey for men that we are now smack dab in the midst of with 11 men. We’re having an amazing time with these men, regularly diving into real, raw, vulnerable conversations with each other, exploring new insights, empowering distinctions, and new life practices all in the service of discovering what it really means, for each of us, to thrive in life, as men.
Side note – before I tell you why Tait was so excited when he called me – in the next few months, perhaps even as you’re listening to this right now, we are finally opening up more opportunities for more men to join the Elevate experience, and step into actually living The 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man … Intimacy. Purpose. Spirituality. Family. Brotherhood. Go to bryanreeves.com/elevate for details. Though depending on when you hear this, you might see the page for our current ELEVATE 2021 coaching adventure, which is full, but if you’re listening to this episode a bit after it’s been published, then you may indeed see a new invitation to participate. If you do, do not hesitate! You are not supposed to figure out your life alone. And you are not alone in the challenges and struggles you face as a man. While your unique path in life is yours alone to discover and choose, you are not supposed to walk that path alone, and certainly not without other inspired and wise men by your side to help you find your way. That is what is at the core of the ELEVATE experience for men. We are men challenging and supporting each other to find each our own way into the thriving, beautiful, mature manhood that is our birthright! 
www.bryanreeves.com/elevate is the link. Check it out.
Now, back to Tait’s excitement!
Tait had just listened to a weekly live broadcast I do on Instagram and Facebook, called Wisdom Wednesdays … I mostly do it weekly but I also sometimes just need a damn rest and will take a wednesday off, but anyway he had just listened to a live broadcast I did with a few hundred people – mostly women – in which the main topic was, “Why do Grown Men Ghost Women?” … 
Well, Tait was just blown away by what I shared during that broadcast, and he insisted I turn it into a podcast episode. 
He’s one of the smartest and most discerning men I know, so I listened to him. This episode is that live broadcast. Now, I believe I’ve edited out most of what might make a straight rebroadcast of an IG live annoying – like awkward delays and pauses and reading off people’s comments that don’t make any damn sense – so I think you’ll really enjoy this.
Whether or not you think ghosting by itself is an interesting subject, what I really dive into is the stuck adolescence that many men unknowingly find ourselves in, and why that contributes to our very real and persisting struggles in intimacy. I explore some key psychological differences between a boy and a man. I reference that 1980s movie, Weird Science, where two teenage boys literally invent a “perfect woman” with a computer. 
I dive into really so much depth in just 40 minutes, and I do read off many of the comments – particularly from women – that are pertinent to the topic, and I think we men really need to hear what women experience in our presence. And it’s often faaaar easier to hear difficult truths from a woman you don’t know, than from the one you are intimate with. Reminds me of the time I finally heard everything an ex-girlfriend had been desperately trying to communicate to me for 5 years … I finally heard that ex,]]>
Bryan Reeves 48:46
The Journey of Soul Initiation w/ Bill Plotkin (065) https://bryanreeves.com/soul-initiation-bill-plotkin-065/ Wed, 02 Jun 2021 05:16:51 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48795 What does it look like to live a truly authentic life? Not just the way some 22-year old tik-tok’er might tell you to live “authentically” … but I mean to live daily connected to the your soul’s deepest purpose for living? … What does THAT kind of life look like? Perhaps more importantly, how do ... <a title="The Journey of Soul Initiation w/ Bill Plotkin (065)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/soul-initiation-bill-plotkin-065/" aria-label="More on The Journey of Soul Initiation w/ Bill Plotkin (065)">Read more</a> What does it look like to live a truly authentic life? Not just the way some 22-year old tik-tok’er might tell you to live “authentically” … but I mean to live daily connected to the your soul’s deepest purpose for living? What does it look like to live a truly authentic life? Not just the way some 22-year old tik-tok’er might tell you to live “authentically” … but I mean to live daily connected to the your soul’s deepest purpose for living? … What does THAT kind of life look like?
Perhaps more importantly, how do you actually step into living a soul-centric life?

In this episode, my guest is the visionary depth psychologist and wilderness guide, Bill Plotkin.
Now, listen up. This episode is like no other. Bill is one of the most genius and inspired visionaries you’ve probably never heard of.
He’s the author of a few books that have been rocking my world the last few years, notably, Nature and The Human Soul, and now his latest book, The Journey of Soul Initiation: A Field Guide for Visionaries, Evolutionaries, and Revolutionaries.
I’m serious when I say listen up … this may be the most important podcast episode I ever create. I love all my guests, and what particularly excites me about Bill Plotkin, is that when I first read his book, Nature and The Human Soul, I felt like what the Israelites must have felt like when Moses came back from Mount Sinai with the Ten Commandments. 
Not that Bill has brought back commandments of any sort, but through his work spanning probably 5 decades now, as a depth psychologist, wilderness guide, and founder of western Colorado’s Animas Valley Institute, where he has led thousands of women and men through nature-based initiatory passages, what he HAS brought back is a map of human development that I believe to be as all encompassing as any map modern day humanity has discovered. Building on Carl Jung’s work, and the work of countless other brilliant hearts and minds spanning a myriad of human cultures, when I read Bill’s work, I understand more clearly the adventure of my life, the story arcs that have played out, the excruciating bottoms I’ve hit at critical and pivotal moments of my life, and what the real tasks of the different stages of life are that, if I don’t accomplish those tasks, then I don’t truly grow or evolve, even though my body may age. In fact, this is one of the major themes throughout Bill’s work – which I assure you is a MASTER work; his books are just masterpieces of wisdom and insight and practical information – but a major theme he explores, and that we talk about in this episode, is the overwhelming lack of true adults in the modern world, the state of humanity as one currently made up largely of people stuck in adolescent ways of thinking, being, and doing. It’s certainly not hard to make the case for that these days; just read the news or scroll through your social media feed. You may not be able to quite put a finger on it, but something constantly nags at you that the world around you is largely devoid of real wisdom and nuance and maturity. 
Bill’s masterfully explains why this is, and at a depth far beyond politics, and opinions, and even philosophy.
Bill’s work is sourced from nature, itself. And I mean that both poetically, and literally!
Look, I can’t possibly articulate to you how important and thorough his work is. Today he and I talk about perhaps the most critical phase of a life journey, The Journey of Soul Initiation. Bill might say all the phases of a life journey are critical, that you can’t grow beyond one stage until you successfully complete the tasks of that phase. I actually don’t know exactly what he’d say to that, and I don’t ask him in this conversation, but The Journey of Soul Initiation, is, according to Bill’s model of eco-centric human development,...]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:25:09
Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) – Part Two (064) https://bryanreeves.com/choose-her-part-two-064/ Wed, 19 May 2021 04:00:09 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48788 Do you struggle with intimate relationship? Do you have a hard time choosing your partner every … single … day? Do you ever feel UNCHOSEN by your intimate partner? This episode is a bit unusual in that it’s actually a rebroadcast of another podcast I was recently featured on, The Art of Authenticity, hosted by ... <a title="Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) – Part Two (064)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/choose-her-part-two-064/" aria-label="More on Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) – Part Two (064)">Read more</a> Do you struggle with intimate relationship? Do you have a hard time choosing your partner every … single … day? Do you ever feel UNCHOSEN by your intimate partner? This episode is a bit unusual in that it’s actually a rebroadcast of another podcast I w... Do you struggle with intimate relationship?
Do you have a hard time choosing your partner every … single … day?
Do you ever feel UNCHOSEN by your intimate partner?

This episode is a bit unusual in that it’s actually a rebroadcast of another podcast I was recently featured on, The Art of Authenticity, hosted by my friend, Laura Coe.
Typically, I reserve this podcast for wisdom conversations amongst men, not because I want to exclude women – God no! Shoot to be straight up with you, truth is I know far more women I consider to be wise than I do men! This podcast would be EASIER to produce if I brought in women, and I will almost surely do that eventually – but that’s exactly WHY I have so far reserved this space for conversations between men, because I believe the world desperately NEEDS more men to be having more of these kinds of real, raw, vulnerable conversations amongst men who have cultivated maturity and depth and insight through real life experience.
But Laura is a brilliant woman and an amazing host of her podcast, and I really enjoyed her ability to conduct an amazing conversation around my new book, “Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her” … so I decided this would be a perfect way of bringing you deeper into the experience of this book, including a breakdown of some of its core insights and distinctions.
I highly recommend diving into “Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her” whether you’re a man or a woman, in a relationship or single, because you’ll learn many of the secrets that should never be secrets!!! to creating exquisite intimacy with another, and with yourself, too. I certainly wish I knew these things 20 years ago; so much suffering – both for me and for many others – could have been averted! It’s available on most major book retailers’ websites, including Amazon, and you can also find links to buy the book on my website at bryanreeves.com/book … 
One last thing, the audio is a little funky in places, but I’m a bit fanatic about these things; you might not even notice.
So, take a deep breath, and stay present with us, all the way through to the end of the rebroadcast of Laura Coe’s “Art of Authenticity” on this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her (The Book)
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Bryan Reeves 1:07:16
Are You Being Authentic … Or Just A Jerk? w/ Dr. Aziz (063) https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-aziz-063/ Thu, 06 May 2021 05:00:37 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48780 What does it (really) mean to be authentic? How can you know when you’re being authentic, or just being a jerk? Are you aware that your thoughts may be lying to you, actually preventing you from being authentic? In this episode, my guest is Dr. Aziz Gazipura, the founder of The Social Confidence Center, author ... <a title="Are You Being Authentic … Or Just A Jerk? w/ Dr. Aziz (063)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/authentic-aziz-063/" aria-label="More on Are You Being Authentic … Or Just A Jerk? w/ Dr. Aziz (063)">Read more</a> What does it (really) mean to be authentic? How can you know when you’re being authentic, or just being a jerk? Are you aware that your thoughts may be lying to you, actually preventing you from being authentic? In this episode, my guest is Dr. What does it (really) mean to be authentic?
How can you know when you’re being authentic, or just being a jerk?
Are you aware that your thoughts may be lying to you, actually preventing you from being authentic?

In this episode, my guest is Dr. Aziz Gazipura, the founder of The Social Confidence Center, author of a number of books on building confidence and breaking through social anxiety.
Truth is, I didn’t really know what to expect in our conversation today, because Dr Aziz is another man who’s work I wasn’t that familiar with. One thing I want you to know, my dear listener, is that this podcast, “Men, This Way,” is an act of service, a “heartwork” borne of the depths of my own soul’s yearning. I intend for it to be a carrier of wisdom. And as such, my conversations with guests are honest, real inquiries into a person’s experiences and life lessons, vulnerable explorations into the events and forces that have shaped their lives – and mine – as men. 
This is not merely a platform to sell expertise, or workshops, or books, although we will sometimes talk about those things.
I get a lot of inquiries from men (and many women, too) to be guests. I don’t say yes to most of them, because I treat your listening as sacred, and my time as precious. There are plenty of podcasts that dive into someone’s “expertise” and the “life-hacks” they want to teach you. 
We’ll offer some of that here, but these are wisdom conversations. Wisdom conversations don’t always – or perhaps ever – end with firm conclusions to life’s most enduring questions. Instead, a wisdom conversation opens up new doors of perception and possibility. They offer insight, and often they’ll offer even more inspired questions, to help light the path forward for your journey through life.
I really enjoyed my conversation with Dr. Aziz. He is clearly a man who is continuing to evolve and grow and deepen his own capacity to be of true service to the world. 
He is a clinical psychologist who serves people through his books, videos, coaching, trainings, and his own podcast, as well, to break through challenges around confidence and social anxiety.
Like most of my episodes we cover a wide range of topics in this one, though we center around the question of authenticity – what does it look like, feel like, sound like, to BE authentic – as well as what does it NOT look like, feel like, or sound like. So even if you don’t think you struggle with confidence or social anxiety, I encourage you to listen through this episode, for this exploration around “what is authenticity” is an essential one for any man – or woman – who would live a truly fulfilling life. 
One more thing, my new book is now out, “CHOOSE HER EVERYDAY OR LEAVE HER” “ A Guide For your journey through the transformational fires of love and intimacy. IT’s an anthology of my teaching stories, enlightening insights, practical tools, and secrets to creating extraordinary relationship (that should never be secrets!) in one beautifully bound and buttery red book that you can now own as you continue your own journey to thriving in love and intimacy. Get free domestic US shipping when you buy it @ https://bryanreeves.com/book …. If you are international, or like using Amazon, you can now order it in many more places around the world, including KOBO in Canada, and Kindle anywhere you have access to that. It’s also available on Barnes & Nobles and more and more platforms. “Choose Her Every Day Or Leave Her” – essential reading for any man or woman who genuinely wants to thrive in intimacy. 
Alright, back to my episode with Dr. Aziz Gazipura … Take a deep breath, and stay present with us all the way through to Dr. Aziz’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
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Bryan Reeves 1:10:29
The Magic of Surrender w/ Kute Blackson (062) https://bryanreeves.com/magic-surrender-kute-blackson-062/ Fri, 23 Apr 2021 18:36:47 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48753 Do you really think you’re in control of your life? Do you ever feel stuck or stagnant, or like no matter how hard you grind, true happiness and fulfillment seem always just out of reach? What if the fulfillment you seek, only comes through the practice of surrender?  In this episode, my guest, Kute Blackson, ... <a title="The Magic of Surrender w/ Kute Blackson (062)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/magic-surrender-kute-blackson-062/" aria-label="More on The Magic of Surrender w/ Kute Blackson (062)">Read more</a> Do you really think you’re in control of your life? Do you ever feel stuck or stagnant, or like no matter how hard you grind, true happiness and fulfillment seem always just out of reach? What if the fulfillment you seek, Do you really think you’re in control of your life?
Do you ever feel stuck or stagnant, or like no matter how hard you grind, true happiness and fulfillment seem always just out of reach?
What if the fulfillment you seek, only comes through the practice of surrender? 

In this episode, my guest, Kute Blackson, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Kute is a return guest to the show. Kute and I have been friends for many years now, and I always love the rich experience of being in conversation with the wisdom being that is Kute. 
Kute has just come out with a new book, The Magic of Surrender. 
This practice of Surrender is one of the core practices I’ve been exploring for many years in my own life. There are so many myths and misunderstandings about what it means to live surrendered, and I’m excited to explore some of those with Kute today.
Kute is a beloved inspirational speaker and transformational teacher. He is author of the national bestselling book You.Are.The.One. and his new book, The Magic of Surrender. He has been featured on Larry King Now, Fox and Friends, Dr. Drew, and Inc magazine once called him ‘The Mindfulness Guru Billionaires Go To For Advice’. 
In this episode, Kute and I talk about what people misunderstand about the practice of surrender, how to know when you are NOT practicing genuine surrender, why the ability to properly grieve is so important, how to actually practice surrender … and so much more. Oh, we also talk about the tendency to want our intimate partner’s to do any surrendering before we do – which usually kinda sounds like, “babe, will you just do everything the way I want you to so being with you is easier for me?” … and how obviously that never goes well!
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Kute’s Book: The Magic Of Surrender
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:15:02
Navigating Chivalry & Gender-Equality in The Modern World w/ Shu Matsuo Post (061) https://bryanreeves.com/shu-matsuo-post-061/ Thu, 25 Feb 2021 08:00:51 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48703 How can we reconcile old notions of chivalry with modern expectations of gender-equality? Can gender-equality actually help MEN feel more free, too? Do you really understand the (daily) privileges men have over women? In this episode, my guest, Japanese author Shu Matsuo Post … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to ... <a title="Navigating Chivalry & Gender-Equality in The Modern World w/ Shu Matsuo Post (061)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/shu-matsuo-post-061/" aria-label="More on Navigating Chivalry & Gender-Equality in The Modern World w/ Shu Matsuo Post (061)">Read more</a> How can we reconcile old notions of chivalry with modern expectations of gender-equality? Can gender-equality actually help MEN feel more free, too? Do you really understand the (daily) privileges men have over women? In this episode, my guest, How can we reconcile old notions of chivalry with modern expectations of gender-equality?
Can gender-equality actually help MEN feel more free, too?
Do you really understand the (daily) privileges men have over women?

In this episode, my guest, Japanese author Shu Matsuo Post … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Shu Matsuo Post is the author of a new book titled, “I Took Her Name.”
Shu is a bit of an anomaly on Men, This Way, because I didn’t really know of him personally before inviting him on to the podcast. Usually, my guests are actual friends, or men I’ve studied with for a time, who’s work I’ve already been following and learning from for some time. Shu is new to me. But if I’m going to continue this podcast, and continue on my quest to discover the deeper wisdom that lives in the hearts of experienced men, then I’ve got to push beyond my known zone and have conversations with men I don’t know at all. 
So this episode is a first foray into that experience … and I’m excited to welcome Shu Matsuo Post, all the way from Japan, to be my first of the sort. I first heard about Shu’s book from his publicist – it’s titled, “I Took Her Name,” and it’s his personal story of taking his wife’s last name after marriage, and in the context of a Japanese culture – really a world culture – that doesn’t exactly hold that up as an option for men. Obviously the predominant cultural expectation remains that a woman will take her husband’s last name. It’s still a bit edgy and uncommon these days for two people to marry and both keep their own last names. Nevermind a man choosing to take his wife’s last name. Still, when I first heard about Shu’s book, honestly my first thought was, big deal! So what. He took his wife’s last name. I grew up with two strong mothers (married to my two fathers) and, well, my step-mother never took my father’s last name, and my step-father benefited greatly from my mom having his last name, because she was such a bad-ass that she actually had a building in Maryland, named after HER, for her humanitarian work … of course it carried HIS last name, even though it was her 35 years of service that put his last name on that building … ANYWAY … this ain’t the sole focus of our conversation. Because what, at least to me, is far more interesting in Shu’s story, is what he awakened to, what he learned, through a journey fraught with various challenges that women face all the time, yet few men ever do, that he could only experience by taking his wife’s last name …
So, like all my episodes, our conversation wanders through a range of interesting territory, from a discovery of the privileges men actually do have over women in our daily lives, to modern questions around chivalry, such as how do you open a door for a woman without being accused of sexism, to the surprising experience of freedom that can occur for us men as we learn to embrace, and fight for, gender equality.
One more thing, my new book is now out, “CHOOSE HER EVERYDAY OR LEAVE HER” “ A Guide For your journey through the transformational fires of love and intimacy. An anthology of my teaching stories, enlightening insights, practical tools, and secrets to creating extraordinary relationship (that should never be secrets!) in one beautifully bound and buttery red book that you can now own as you continue your own journey to thriving in love and intimacy.
Get free domestic US shipping when you buy it @ https://bryanreeves.com/book ….]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:04:26
Sexual Self-Mastery w/ Destin Gerek (060) https://bryanreeves.com/sexual-mastery-destin-gerek-060/ Sun, 31 Jan 2021 05:00:02 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48673 What do men tend to misunderstand about sex and sexual pleasure? Can a lack of body sensitivity be the underlying cause of sex and intimacy issues? What practices can men do to increase sensitivity, and thus sexual pleasure (both for ourselves and our partners)? In this episode, my guest, renowned and certified sexologist Destin Gerek, ... <a title="Sexual Self-Mastery w/ Destin Gerek (060)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/sexual-mastery-destin-gerek-060/" aria-label="More on Sexual Self-Mastery w/ Destin Gerek (060)">Read more</a> What do men tend to misunderstand about sex and sexual pleasure? Can a lack of body sensitivity be the underlying cause of sex and intimacy issues? What practices can men do to increase sensitivity, and thus sexual pleasure (both for ourselves and our ... What do men tend to misunderstand about sex and sexual pleasure?
Can a lack of body sensitivity be the underlying cause of sex and intimacy issues?
What practices can men do to increase sensitivity, and thus sexual pleasure (both for ourselves and our partners)?

In this episode, my guest, renowned and certified sexologist Destin Gerek, and I mine these questions and more – so much more – for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
I first crossed paths with Destin back in 2010, at an epic mansion party in the mountains about 90 minutes north of LA. One thing I noticed immediately about him was that he just exuded sexual charge. But not in a cocky way – pardon the pun – not in that bro-y, arrogant, aggressive way that many of us have experienced in other men. No. I hadn’t yet begun my own deep dive into intentional sexual and emotional awakening practices, so I didn’t really understand what I was experiencing in Destin’s presence. I know now that I was simply in the presence of a man who was deeply, beautifully, learning to connect to his own body. 
A few years later, Destin and I reconnected at Lightning in a Bottle, one of those really fun Burning-Man-esque west coast festivals, where I was speaking on a panel to about 600 people, talking about my experiences using pornography. Amidst a huge outdoor audience, my eye caught Destin standing at the edge of the crowd, and again his presence just struck out at me.
I’m really glad to have Destin here today. I love the work he’s doing, has been doing, for many years, to help men awaken through sexuality. He’s dedicated his life to helping men learn how to cultivate their masculine power, by learning the secrets of sexual self-mastery, all while rooted in a set of ethics that men can feel proud to align themselves with. The fact that he’s not just some pick-up artist or sexual tantra teacher with shady ethics, but rather an honorable Man – and a husband, and father of two little ones – helping men learn to feel enlivened in their own bodies. .. well, that’s why he’s on Men, This Way, today.
I have great respect for Destin, and this is one of my favorite episodes of “Men, This Way” because we explore some really important topics together, like the overwhelming prevalence of sexual violation among most women, that men must be aware of and why, as well as the affect of pornography on men’s bodies, which by the way neither Destin nor I are against porn, and both of us even still do watch it, though with some very important caveats.
We also talk about what’s going on when a man ejaculates too fast, or not at all, and how to awaken sensitivity to your felt experience, in your body, such that you can become a better lover not because you know some new technique to rock your partner’s world, but rather you know better how to be fully PRESENT to your partner’s actual world, which is the one thing that most women, especially, almost NEVER get from men.
Also at the end, for those of you who know David Deida’s work, Destin and I briefly dive into some of the pitfalls people often fall into with his work, and how he and I have both evolved our own understanding of the masculine-feminine experience in our own lives.
This is a juicy episode, and we talk about all that, and more. So definitely stay tuned all the way through to Destin Gerek’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Destin’s Short Video ~ “2 Tools For Lasting Longer” 
* this link might take you to Destin’s free upcoming webinar depending on your timing.
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:13:25
The 4th Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ BROTHERHOOD ~ w/ Tait Arend (My Lifelong Soul-Brother) (059) https://bryanreeves.com/brotherhood-tait-arend-059/ Wed, 13 Jan 2021 06:00:05 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48654 What happens when men don’t have deep connections with other men? What’s the cost to our vitality, fulfillment, when we lone-wolf it through life? Could being part of an intentional brotherhood serve your life? In this episode, my guest is, Tait Arend … my lifelong childhood best friend. In this episode, we’re diving into the ... <a title="The 4th Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ BROTHERHOOD ~ w/ Tait Arend (My Lifelong Soul-Brother) (059)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/brotherhood-tait-arend-059/" aria-label="More on The 4th Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ BROTHERHOOD ~ w/ Tait Arend (My Lifelong Soul-Brother) (059)">Read more</a> What happens when men don’t have deep connections with other men? What’s the cost to our vitality, fulfillment, when we lone-wolf it through life? Could being part of an intentional brotherhood serve your life? In this episode, my guest is, What happens when men don’t have deep connections with other men?
What’s the cost to our vitality, fulfillment, when we lone-wolf it through life?
Could being part of an intentional brotherhood serve your life?

In this episode, my guest is, Tait Arend … my lifelong childhood best friend.
In this episode, we’re diving into the 4th pillar of a thriving man: Brotherhood.
In a recent episode I introduced my 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man: Purpose. Intimacy. Family. Brotherhood. Spirit. … Who better to invite on to talk about the pillar of Brotherhood than the man who’s been my soul-brother since we were both 10 years old – 36 years ago. 
What does this word “brother” mean?
On the first day of a men’s retreat in Norway that I was invited to help support a few years ago, I heard a man say, “I don’t know why we use this word brother with each other. You guys aren’t my brothers. I don’t know you. I don’t get it.” … At the end of that incredible week, after 6 days of us men being respectfully challenged by each other, getting vulnerable and at times being very uncomfortably real with each other, and laughing a lot together, and sometimes screaming and crying with each other, too, he said something I’ll never forget. He said, “I now know what “brother” means. It means you know how I feel.”
“You know how I feel.”
His words have never left me. One of the great tragedies of our modern world is that we men – and women, too – we are essentially taught not to feel, that feelings don’t matter, that productivity, accomplishment, winning should be our primary concerns. 
Well, like many men, perhaps like you, I’ve long struggled with feeling disconnected from my emotions, from my body, thus disconnected even from my intimate partners, and from my own life. At times, I’ve felt unbearably lonely, even when surrounded by people and my own external success. 
It’s only been a few years now that I’ve really awakened to the importance of brotherhood – by which I mean real, vulnerable, courageous companionship with other men in which we celebrate each other’s triumphs, witness and comfort each other in our sorrows, and challenge each other, always with respect, when we see each other playing small in ways that don’t serve. 
My guest today, Tait, is the one man with whom I’ve been profoundly fortunate to share a lifetime of brotherhood.
He’s one of the most thoughtful, smart, and alive people I’ve ever known. And I’m so honored, and excited, to invite you into our beautiful friendship today, to hear the story of our brotherhood, including some of the challenges we’ve faced, and some of the ways we’ve let each other, or other men, down, and the costs of it.
Tait – I’m so delighted to share – is actually my right hand man for ELEVATE 2021, the year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving in every domain of life. … which begins imminently.
ELEVATE 2021: A year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving.
If you’re interested in being part of an incredible brotherhood going through all of 2021 together, sharing in our challenges, challenging each other to show up, step up, speak up, and create new experiences of success, new breakthroughs in our lives, in ways we often can’t even imagine are possible until we’re held in a powerful container of brotherhood with other men … if any of that speaks to you, then definitely apply now for ELEVATE 2021 @ https://bryanreeves.com/elevate,
We only have 3 spots left, of 10 total. 3 spots! You’re going to receive private coaching with me, group coaching with me AND Tait, as well as an in-person retreat in late summer when we’ll all gather in a beautiful nature location to share an incredible experience together. And best of all, I think,]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:05:08
The 2nd Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ INTIMACY ~ w/ Silvy Khoucasian (My Intimate Partner) (058) https://bryanreeves.com/intimacy-silvy-khoucasian-058/ Wed, 02 Dec 2020 09:00:21 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48616 What is intimacy … really? Can you experience intimacy without another person actually present? (hint: yes!) Why do so many men (women, too!) struggle with sustaining intimacy? In this episode, my very special guest and I dive into these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life … my ... <a title="The 2nd Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ INTIMACY ~ w/ Silvy Khoucasian (My Intimate Partner) (058)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/intimacy-silvy-khoucasian-058/" aria-label="More on The 2nd Pillar of a Thriving Man ~ INTIMACY ~ w/ Silvy Khoucasian (My Intimate Partner) (058)">Read more</a> What is intimacy … really? Can you experience intimacy without another person actually present? (hint: yes!) Why do so many men (women, too!) struggle with sustaining intimacy? In this episode, my very special guest and I dive into these questions and ... What is intimacy … really?
Can you experience intimacy without another person actually present? (hint: yes!)
Why do so many men (women, too!) struggle with sustaining intimacy?

In this episode, my very special guest and I dive into these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life … my very special guest is … Silvy Khoucasian! … my first lady guest ever! … 
Why did I invite Silvy onto this podcast that has heretofore been exclusively and intentionally a conversation amongst men seeking wisdom? Well, first reason, she’s brilliant and she’s bad-ass … and I’ll share more about that in a moment, but first I’ll share the second reason, she is also MY LADY. My intimate life partner of 5 years.
For this episode, I’m diving into my 2nd Pillar of a Thriving Man: Intimacy … recall from the last episode when I introduced my 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man: Purpose. Intimacy. Family. Brotherhood. Spirit. … Who better to invite on to talk about the pillar of Intimacy than the very exquisite woman I am in intimate relationship with now and for the last 5 years.
One of the key distinctions we’ll talk about is the difference between intimacy with self, and intimacy with another. Because this pillar, intimacy, is not something you need a partner to help you fulfill and live fully. Absolutely not! I say Intimacy begins with know thyself. In other words, learn to be intimate with self first as a foundation for intimacy with another.
This idea of “know thyself” was the basis of so much of my personal programming from a very young age, particularly given the hyper-individualistic, self-improvement spirituality culture I was immersed in throughout my youth and well into my late 30s. A culture largely responsible for me learning how to create my best life and all that … but it also made intimate relationship with another human being difficult. And when I met Silvy the limitations of my hyper-individualism came crashing down on top of me.
For Silvy came from a more traditional non-western family culture in which relational intimacy with the members of your family and community was primary, and intimacy with self, knowing thyself and living thy truth, was hardly a concept encouraged or even talked about. And our two cultures clashed at the beginning of our relationship, and even still today sometimes clash. But that is exactly what we both needed and continue to need. But we fought hard against this difference between us for a while, and it almost cost us our relationship.
So, we talk about all that and more as we invite you into our love story, and our adventure in intimacy both with ourselves and each other … and it’s my hope that by the end of this episode you’ll understand more why INTIMACY is the 2nd pillar of a thriving man. 
Back to her being a bad-ass … Silvy in her own right has been one of the early leaders of the Instagram therapist community. Though she is still working towards her full therapist licensure, Silvy is already a world renowned and highly sought after expert on the subject of healthy relationships and how to create and maintain them. 
She’s been interviewed by Vogue Magazine, Playboy Magazine, Allure Magazine, and featured by Buzzfeed and countless other worldwide media.
And I’m really excited for our first conversation together on Men, This Way. 
But before we dive in. 
Men, remember, I’m offering just 10 men the opportunity to join me for the adventure of a lifetime throughout all of 2021. I’ve already had 2 men claim their spots for ELEVATE 2021, which means only 8 remain as of the time of this recording – end November 2020. 
ELEVATE 2021: a year-long coaching adventure for men committed to thriving.
I invite you on this year-long journey with me to make 2021 extraordinary.]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:01:00
The 5 Pillars Of A Thriving Man (057) https://bryanreeves.com/5-pillars-thriving-man-057/ Thu, 12 Nov 2020 02:45:19 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48540 Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives? What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”? What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life? In this episode, I dive into the 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man. These 5 pillars came to me 3 ... <a title="The 5 Pillars Of A Thriving Man (057)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/5-pillars-thriving-man-057/" aria-label="More on The 5 Pillars Of A Thriving Man (057)">Read more</a> Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives? What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”? What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life? In this episode, Why do men (even when we succeed) often struggle to enjoy our daily lives?
What are we missing on our endlessly futile “pursuit of happiness”?
What are the key ingredients for a deeply fulfilling life?

In this episode, I dive into the 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man.
These 5 pillars came to me 3 years ago on a cabin retreat in the mountains with my oldest friend, Tait. We’d traveled up a windy road to a gorgeous mountain area 90 minutes northeast of Los Angeles known as Lake Arrowhead, to do some deep reflection together on our lives. We were both maybe 43 at the time, living on opposite coasts, he in North Carolina and I in California, both partnered to amazing women, both doing meaningful work with significant positive impact on countless people’s lives, and yet somehow we were also both awakening to deep pangs of loneliness. 
So we went up to this cabin with my canine companion, Yellowjhan, for a weekend of food, fire, laughter, and reflection. 
These 5 Pillars came to me one night after an evening filled with wild laughter and agonized tears. As I reflected on my own life journey, all that I’d accomplished, which included everything I thought I was supposed to ever want, I realized I had an inner yearning for things I’d never given mind to. I awoke to essential elements of a truly good life that no one had ever taught me were essential for a man. I’d only ever seen my fathers and uncles concerned about maybe one or two of these 5 Pillars – no wonder they’d struggled so much despite having homes and families and professional success!
In this episode, I offer a brief introduction to The 5 Pillars of a Thriving Man:

* Purpose
* Intimacy
* Family
* Brotherhood
* Spirituality 

** URGENT: If you’re a man committed to thriving in every domain of your life, I invite you on a year-long journey to make 2021 an extraordinary year.

Whether you want to make a massive shift in your professional life, make more money, connect to and really live your deepest purpose every day, or maybe you want to improve the quality of your intimate relationship experiences, or to be more present with your family, or perhaps you’re simply ready to make profound shifts in how you show up for yourself, for your own deep well-being.
I’m inviting only 10 men to coach with me for an entire year – which includes private 1:1 coaching, and an intimate men’s group experience with 10 men alongside you (including a 5-day retreat).
These men, which might include you, I am ultimately selecting. I want this to be a curated group of men that I myself would be excited to spend the year with … because that’s exactly what I’ll be doing, spending this entire year with you. We’ll also all meet in person for a 5-day retreat in a beautiful nature location in August. Through this experience these men, and I, will become your brothers for life. You will be both challenged to go beyond your comfort zone, and celebrated as you step more fully into offering your soul-gifts to the world, whatever that looks like for you. Also, best part, I think, is it includes consistent on-demand video access throughout the year to me and this exclusive brotherhood.
This isn’t for everyone. Only 10 men will be invited into this experience.
If you are ready to step deeper into your full, free expression as a Man, and fully give your greatest gifts to the world, to your loved ones, and live the vow you know your soul is waiting for you to make … then this is for you.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Elevate 2021
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:02:21
Don’t Take Sides (Do Take a Position) (056) https://bryanreeves.com/dont-take-sides-056/ Thu, 17 Sep 2020 16:16:32 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48429 Are you struggling with the growing divisions in our current world? Are you afraid things might get worse before they get better? Did you know that a descent into darkness, a terrifying uncertainty, is essential for human transformation? In this episode, I explore how our current ego-centric model of society almost guarantees the kinds of ... <a title="Don’t Take Sides (Do Take a Position) (056)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/dont-take-sides-056/" aria-label="More on Don’t Take Sides (Do Take a Position) (056)">Read more</a> Are you struggling with the growing divisions in our current world? Are you afraid things might get worse before they get better? Did you know that a descent into darkness, a terrifying uncertainty, is essential for human transformation? Are you struggling with the growing divisions in our current world?
Are you afraid things might get worse before they get better?
Did you know that a descent into darkness, a terrifying uncertainty, is essential for human transformation?

In this episode, I explore how our current ego-centric model of society almost guarantees the kinds of divisions and even increasing violence we’re seeing more and more of at the moment. I’ll share with you my own struggles around a conversation with a close friend who’s been leaning in the direction of supporting Trump for another term of presidency. If you’re a Trump supporter, I implore you to continue listening, because although I don’t support Trump for president, I am not against him, or against you. I’m not on any side that is not also ultimately on your side, too. What I mean is, just because I’m taking a position doesn’t mean I’m taking a side.
I think this is a critical distinction for our world right now, and in this episode I’ll explore how it is possible to take a position without taking sides. And if we’re going to bridge our differences without violence, which only intends to eradicate threats, not bridge differences, well, then we need to learn how to take different positions on things without taking opposite sides.
I’m excited for this episode, and it’s a vulnerable one for me, as I’m taking you to the edge of my own practice and understanding around what’s happening in the world today, and how I’m consciously choosing to show up in it. I’ll also share with you what my own confrontation with the seeming darkness that is now encroaching upon humanity looks like.
So, take a deep breath, and stay present with me, all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
RECOMMENDED BOOK ~ Nature & The Human Soul by Bill Plotkin
]]>
Bryan Reeves 57:03
Why Men Need Personal Growth Work (With Other Men) w/ Sascha Lewis (055) https://bryanreeves.com/mens-growth-sascha-lewis-055/ Wed, 26 Aug 2020 15:50:37 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48415 Do you genuinely trust other men? Do you hesitate to trust your own emotions? Why do we men need to hit bottom before we’re (truly) ready to change? In this episode, my guest is Sascha Lewis, co-founder of the international men’s group organization, Evryman (with no second “e”). Sascha and I were recently reconnected by ... <a title="Why Men Need Personal Growth Work (With Other Men) w/ Sascha Lewis (055)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/mens-growth-sascha-lewis-055/" aria-label="More on Why Men Need Personal Growth Work (With Other Men) w/ Sascha Lewis (055)">Read more</a> Do you genuinely trust other men? Do you hesitate to trust your own emotions? Why do we men need to hit bottom before we’re (truly) ready to change? In this episode, my guest is Sascha Lewis, co-founder of the international men’s group organization, Do you genuinely trust other men?
Do you hesitate to trust your own emotions?
Why do we men need to hit bottom before we’re (truly) ready to change?

In this episode, my guest is Sascha Lewis, co-founder of the international men’s group organization, Evryman (with no second “e”).
Sascha and I were recently reconnected by a mutual friend, Fabian Alsultany. I’d met Sascha briefly at (what was probably) a Grammy Awards party at Fabian’s house in Los Angeles years ago, and when Fabian reconnected us just a few weeks ago, I was surprised to learn that Sascha had co-founded Evryman. Because one of my men’s groups, which I’ve been meeting with weekly for damn near the last 2 years, was based on the Evryman meeting format. 
Sascha, a lifelong New Yorker, has been holed up with his pregnant wife in Brooklyn, New York, throughout the pandemic. We spoke just as New York is beginning to open back up. And although he shares some of his experience of the pandemic at the beginning of the episode, our conversation is more a deep dive into the transformative power of men’s work, of learning to trust other men – even men who on the surface seem to hold completely different values than yours, of the resistance we men often experience when it comes to changing our lives, even when we’re suffering, doing the emotional literacy work required to live fulfilling lives, and have fulfilling relationships, not just with another person, but with yourself. 
We explore all that and more. 
In addition to co-founding Evryman, Sascha is a lifelong entrepreneur and consultant with extensive experience in starting and developing businesses focused on the intersection of personal growth, progressive culture and digital media. His work has been featured in the New York Times, TODAY, Good Morning America, CNN, GQ, Vice, the Financial Times and The Economist.
I really enjoyed this conversation with Sascha, and if you have any interest in – or resistance to – personal growth work specifically for men, definitely stay tuned all the way through to Sascha’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Evryman.com
futurepresent.info
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:24:57
Your Divine Appointment (When The Worst Thing Becomes The Best Thing) w/ Rev James Trapp (054) https://bryanreeves.com/divine-appointment-james-trapp-054/ Wed, 12 Aug 2020 19:46:39 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48398 What is your divine appointment (what you’re uniquely here to do)? What is your “essential necessity” (that keeps you going when things get tough)? How can we contribute to the world in ways that don’t create more upset & division? My guest today, the honorable and inspired and inspiring Rev James Trapp, and I mine ... <a title="Your Divine Appointment (When The Worst Thing Becomes The Best Thing) w/ Rev James Trapp (054)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/divine-appointment-james-trapp-054/" aria-label="More on Your Divine Appointment (When The Worst Thing Becomes The Best Thing) w/ Rev James Trapp (054)">Read more</a> What is your divine appointment (what you’re uniquely here to do)? What is your “essential necessity” (that keeps you going when things get tough)? How can we contribute to the world in ways that don’t create more upset & division? My guest today, What is your divine appointment (what you’re uniquely here to do)?
What is your “essential necessity” (that keeps you going when things get tough)?
How can we contribute to the world in ways that don’t create more upset & division?

My guest today, the honorable and inspired and inspiring Rev James Trapp, and I mine these questions and more to make a meaningful difference in your life.
Rev. Trapp is an incredible man. A graduate of the Ivy League Princeton University, His list of accolades, accomplishments, and honors are numerous and impressive, and besides being awarded the Key to wondrous city of Miami, FL, for his contributions to that city, I’m not going to name them here because none of that is why I invited him on.
I invited Rev James Trapp onto “Men, This Way” because the man looms large in the inspired unfolding of my own personal life story. I first encountered him at Unity on the Bay, a spiritual church in Miami, FL, back in … probably 2003-ish … The day before I first walked into his Church, I had no intention of ever setting foot in anything called Church ever again. Although I considered myself a deeply spiritual man, with a deep faith in God, Life, Love, Universe, whatever you wanna call the source energy that permeates and binds and animates all things together, I had long before lost my taste for organized religion. But the day I walked into Rev Trapp’s Unity Church, I didn’t just walk into church, I walked into my destiny. For I was straightaway enraptured by what I found there … and before I continue, I want to ensure you this is NOT a religious podcast. Whatever religious or spiritual views you’re bringing into this conversation, they are welcome, and I am not gonna try and convince you to think or believe anything different. I simply want you to know that Rev Trapp’s Unity Church soon became the spiritual home I didn’t even know I needed. On just my 2nd visit there, I saw a band perform, then called Inner Voice, who would change my life forever, when about 2 years later they asked me to manage them, because I said yes (without hesitation, despite knowing nothing about managing artists), and that choice put me on a trajectory to where I am today, doing the inspired work I do and love, and living the life in California with my bride that I live and love.
So I am deeply honored to feature Rev James Trapp on Men, This Way. We talk about his journey from highly successful Princeton University grad – criminal defense lawyer with money and prestige, through personal breakdown of substance abuse and emotional turmoil, to becoming CEO of Unity Worldwide Ministries, and now Senior Minister at The Spiritual Life Center in Sacramento.
We talk about the power of the mind to create your reality, and the most important things we, as men, can do, to meaningfully participate in and truly serve in helpful ways, today’s increasingly fragmenting and chaotic world.
We talk about all that, and more. So definitely stay tuned all the way through to Rev James Trapp’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
www.jamestrapp.com
“Spiritual Life Center Sacramento” on FACEBOOK
“Spiritual Life Center Sacramento” on YOUTUBE
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:12:52
The New Alpha Male (Feels Everything) w/ Lance Allred (053) https://bryanreeves.com/new-alpha-lance-allred-053/ Fri, 31 Jul 2020 17:47:17 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48377 Have you (finally!) discovered the power of questioning your conclusions? Have you ever successfully climbed the mountains of your aspirations … only to find utter disappointment there? In this episode, my guest is, Lance Allred, the first deaf NBA basketball player in history. Lance just released a new book, The New Alpha Male, with Sounds ... <a title="The New Alpha Male (Feels Everything) w/ Lance Allred (053)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/new-alpha-lance-allred-053/" aria-label="More on The New Alpha Male (Feels Everything) w/ Lance Allred (053)">Read more</a> Have you (finally!) discovered the power of questioning your conclusions? Have you ever successfully climbed the mountains of your aspirations … only to find utter disappointment there? In this episode, my guest is, Lance Allred, Have you (finally!) discovered the power of questioning your conclusions?
Have you ever successfully climbed the mountains of your aspirations … only to find utter disappointment there?

In this episode, my guest is, Lance Allred, the first deaf NBA basketball player in history.
Lance just released a new book, The New Alpha Male, with Sounds True Publishers, and is also the TEDx Star of “What is Your Polygamy?” a video which currently has over 4.6 Million Views.
… but neither of those reasons are why I invited Lance on to Men This Way. There’s plenty of men with popular books and huge video stats who don’t live their message. 
What most fascinated me about Lance is that he grew up in a strict, fundamentalist Mormom polygamist commune in rural Montana, before his family left at the age of 13. 
Some of the stories he shared about his upbringing, and more importantly how he broke away mentally from his upbringing, really spoke to me – because I too grew up with some wildly prophetic, even conspiratorial viewpoints in one of the primary families which I grew up in, which came with massive expectations about the special role I was supposed to play in saving the world from itself. So I wanted to hear more from Lance about his life journey, from grandson of Rulon Allred, leader of the Apostolic United Brethren, a breakaway sect of polygamous Mormon fundamentalists in Utah, Colorado, and Arizona, often called “The Allred Group.” – who by the way was assassinated by the head of a rival polygamous sect … from that, to NBA basketball player, author, and an international corporate speaker.
We cover a lot of ground in this episode, from the challenges and pressures of growing up in a polygamist sect, or any conspiratorial family system that puts the weight of saving the world on your shoulders – as happened to me – to the futility of trying to keep an intimate partner happy, to the importance of questioning the stories we live in (in our own heads), to the fear and disappointment that often awaits us when we finally achieve our dreams – all that and more – in this episode of “Men, This Way” …
So definitely stay tuned for Lance Allred’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Finally, if you want to share feedback or share what this conversation inspired in you, email me directly at bryan@bryanreeves.com … I’d love to hear your thoughts … 
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES + RESOURCES
LANCE’S BOOK: “The New Alpha Male”
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:05:56
A Man Without A Father’s Praise (Never Feels Successful Enough) (052) https://bryanreeves.com/man-praise-successful-052/ Mon, 06 Jul 2020 22:44:09 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48247 Have you struggled to feel successful (enough)? Have you struggled in relationship when you were professionally unfulfilled? Did you know that a dad’s essential gift to a child is to instill both the drive to succeed, and the understanding that you’re already (always) successful? My father’s in town. Now I love my dad, but like ... <a title="A Man Without A Father’s Praise (Never Feels Successful Enough) (052)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/man-praise-successful-052/" aria-label="More on A Man Without A Father’s Praise (Never Feels Successful Enough) (052)">Read more</a> Have you struggled to feel successful (enough)? Have you struggled in relationship when you were professionally unfulfilled? Did you know that a dad’s essential gift to a child is to instill both the drive to succeed, Have you struggled to feel successful (enough)?
Have you struggled in relationship when you were professionally unfulfilled?
Did you know that a dad’s essential gift to a child is to instill both the drive to succeed, and the understanding that you’re already (always) successful?

My father’s in town.
Now I love my dad, but like most men, particularly those who grew up with their father mostly not present, and even many who grew up WITH their father present, we have a complicated relationship as adults.
As I said, I love the man, but I also harbor a deep-seated resentment, even rage, that really I know now just covers over a profound sadness that may never be healed. In fact, I believe the way I have lived my entire life, particularly as an adult, has been shaped by my roller coaster relationship with my overwhelmingly absent father, and in some ways that surely have served me well, such as my endless drive to accomplish whatever I set my mind to because I know no one else is gonna step in and do it for me, and yet in other ways that have been just utterly debilitating, such as my endless pursuit of some measure of success that has eluded me, and I know will continue to elude me, forever.
Today I’m diving into one of my recent popular blogs, A Man Without A Father’s Praise (Never Feels Successful Enough)
My dad is a brilliant man, a man who’s spent the last 40 years of his life working alongside my step-mother to make energy medicine technologies into real and viable products we can use today to help the human body heal. These technologies aren’t too far off from the kind of thing you’d see in a sci-fi TV show like Star Trek. I worked with them back in 2003 to help grow one of their signature products into a 50 million dollar company.
Oprah Winfrey loved that product, and featured it twice on her famous favorite-things audience giveaway shows in both 2003 and 2005. She even invited us on her show to talk about this technology, and when our Public Relations spokesperson completely miffed on one of Oprah’s questions in front of a live audience, I immediately stepped in and spent the next few minutes talking to Oprah about mind-body energy science, how our thoughts and feelings can affect the rhythm and beat of the hearts in our chests, and how we are all connected to our environments, and to each other, through invisible electromagnetic fields that have real impact on us – and I know this all may sound a bit woo-woo to you, and to some degree the science of it all still is, but I’ll tell you, in the words of our vice president who was sitting next to me that day on the Oprah Show, and whose primary character trait was shrewd observer of everything … I had Oprah enraptured.
After the show, I spent another few minutes back stage talking with Oprah – you can see the picture of us taken that day on my website on my story page. On our way back to the hotel that cold day in Chicago, our Vice President told me she was going to make me the International Spokesperson for our company.
Something I had no training for, because up until that point I’d mostly spent working on other aspects of the business. As the technology research the director for the company, I worked with the Miami Dolphins football team for a year. They had agreed to let us study how our product impacted the performance of their players.
I also served as the head of customer service, building up our customer service department essentially from nothing. Oprah featured our product just 6 months after we launched it. Especially in those days, when Oprah featured your product on her show before you were ready for big sales numbers, and before you had a customer service department, well, it was too late to get ready. Building that customer service department even as Oprah promoted it...]]>
Bryan Reeves clean 34:20
Don’t Let Ambition Ruin Your Happiness w/ Brenden (Bam!) Durell (051) https://bryanreeves.com/ambition-happiness-brenden-durell-051/ Fri, 26 Jun 2020 16:49:11 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48207 Can you tell a better story about your greatest disappointments? Could ambition be getting in the way of you (actually) enjoying your life? Did you know cacao – REAL cacao – can help you connect with an intimate partner, and with yourself? Brendan Durell aka BAM! is a new friend of mine whom I first ... <a title="Don’t Let Ambition Ruin Your Happiness w/ Brenden (Bam!) Durell (051)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/ambition-happiness-brenden-durell-051/" aria-label="More on Don’t Let Ambition Ruin Your Happiness w/ Brenden (Bam!) Durell (051)">Read more</a> Can you tell a better story about your greatest disappointments? Could ambition be getting in the way of you (actually) enjoying your life? Did you know cacao – REAL cacao – can help you connect with an intimate partner, and with yourself? Can you tell a better story about your greatest disappointments?
Could ambition be getting in the way of you (actually) enjoying your life?
Did you know cacao – REAL cacao – can help you connect with an intimate partner, and with yourself?

Brendan Durell aka BAM! is a new friend of mine whom I first met at a meeting of a small private men’s group called MAN CAVE ELITE, brought together by our mutual friend, Preston Smiles.
A former professional baseball player, who’s still got that big burly athletic physique, Bam is ALL heart.
You’ll find out why he’s nicknamed Bam in this episode, but the work he’s up to in the world today is essentially all about helping Humanity awaken to a new understanding of the distinction between cultural masculinity and sacred masculinity.
He regularly collaborates and works alongside transformational figures and organizations such as the Conscious Man Brotherhood, Sacred Sons, Preston Smiles, Prince Ea, and others…
In this episode, Bam and I talk about our cross-cultural experiences of happiness, how ambition often gets in the way; we talk about the gift of disappointment, about the healing power of cacao – not that Nestle or Hershey crap only pretending to be chocolate so those company’s can make more profit – no, we’re talking about direct-trade from the source cacao complete with enriching cocoa-butter solids, consuming THAT intoxicating elixir for richer, deeper connections to yourself and others … hmmm??? … we talk about all that and more in this episode of “Men, This Way” …
So definitely stay tuned for Brendan Durell aka BAM!’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Bam on Instagram: innerlightwarrior
Official Website: https://brendendurell.com/
Order Keith’s Cacao
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 54:40
The Heart Knows w/ Arjuna O’Neal https://bryanreeves.com/heart-knows-arjuna-oneal-050/ Fri, 12 Jun 2020 16:17:12 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=48065 Ever struggle with forgiveness? Can you stay in your heart, even when facing someone who hates you? Are you open to an essential, profound conversation between two men on racism? In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your ... <a title="The Heart Knows w/ Arjuna O’Neal" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/heart-knows-arjuna-oneal-050/" aria-label="More on The Heart Knows w/ Arjuna O’Neal">Read more</a> Ever struggle with forgiveness? Can you stay in your heart, even when facing someone who hates you? Are you open to an essential, profound conversation between two men on racism? In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and... Can you stay in your heart, even when facing someone who hates you?
Are you open to an essential, profound conversation between two men on racism?

In this episode, my guest, Arjuna O’Neal … and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life … and we have an essential, profound conversation between two men, one white, one black – or as Arjuna prefers to say, one melanated, one non-melanated – on racism.
Arjuna O’Neal is a profoundly wise man. 
Growing up in Detroit, MI, as the son of a notorious drug dealer in Detroit, Arjuna’s early life was just steeped in many of the tragic circumstances that countless young black men live with daily in these United States of America. 
I met Arjuna last year through a small, private men’s group, called Man Cave Elite, brought together by our mutual friend Preston Smiles. Since meeting him, the conversations we’ve shared and the explorations we’ve plunged into have revealed to me exquisite depths of experience and wisdom in this man. 
In this episode you’re going to hear his story of being shot, his practices around forgiveness, and how he stays in his heart even in the face of men and women, including police, who may be targeting him because of his skin tone.
I originally recorded this on an Instagram live with Arjuna – and although the sound quality is a little different than my typical episodes, it nonetheless flows like a typical episode, very little audience interruption so you should be able to enjoy our conversation, and be deeply moved and inspired by it, as you would any other episode of Men, This Way. Also, it’s a little longer conversation than normal, but I chose to feature it in its entirety because Arjuna has profound, lived wisdom to share with us.
So please stay tuned all the way through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
Arjuna on Instagram
DONATE to Arjuna’s Non-Profit, SHARE-NECESSITIES
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:58:06
You’re Hurt. I’m Angry. Now What? w/ Figs O’Sullivan (049) https://bryanreeves.com/hurt-angry-now-what-049/ Fri, 29 May 2020 22:21:48 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47929 Is relationship conflict your ongoing nemesis? Have you ever been accused of not being sensitive? Do you really understand empathy (and why it’s essential)? In this episode, my guest, Figs O’Sullivan, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life. “Fiachre” O’Sullivan … otherwise known as ... <a title="You’re Hurt. I’m Angry. Now What? w/ Figs O’Sullivan (049)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/hurt-angry-now-what-049/" aria-label="More on You’re Hurt. I’m Angry. Now What? w/ Figs O’Sullivan (049)">Read more</a> Is relationship conflict your ongoing nemesis? Have you ever been accused of not being sensitive? Do you really understand empathy (and why it’s essential)? In this episode, my guest, Figs O’Sullivan, and I mine these questions and more for useful insi... Have you ever been accused of not being sensitive?
Do you really understand empathy (and why it’s essential)?

In this episode, my guest, Figs O’Sullivan, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
“Fiachre” O’Sullivan … otherwise known as Figs … is the founder of Empathi (i) which is essentially a program, or a method, that teaches couples how to resolve conflict by way of learning empathy. Figs is a Husband and dad to two little ones, and  a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in emotion focused therapy … 
Now, I learned of Figs’ work actually through my partner, Silvy Khoucasian … she’s been a big fan of his work for years, and has been telling for me for some time to have him on my show … well, like any proud, stubborn man, I decide who’s on my show … and like many a proud, stubborn man, eventually I realized that my lady is right. When his team reached out to me not long ago, I decided to finally learn more about what he’s up to, and I just finally knew immediately what she’d been telling for years: Figs is a wise man doing important work to help couples navigate conflict by teaching them how to create connection in difficult moments. 
I really enjoyed this conversation with Figs. In this episode we talk about conflict, about the myth of men’s emotional sensitivity (that actually men are deeply sensitive); we talk a lot about empathy, why it matters, pathways to experiencing it, and how to create connection in moments where both partners are triggered and upset, and otherwise just unable to bridge their differences in a painful moment. 
I hate to contribute to stereotype, but like so many Irishmen I’ve met over the years, he’s also just a great and funny story teller, and I think you’re going to get a lot of both wisdom and laughter and enjoyment out of this episode. 
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5.30 – Growing up between the terror of alcoholism and the need for safety and connection
13.00 – What is empathy?
16.00 – Allowing your different perspectives to make relationship even better 
26.00 – Is it possible to never say something disrespectful to your partner?
28.50 – What people really need to have a better relationship
34:00 – What happens when a man hits bottom (he’s finally willing to change)
35:00 – The real magic is in repairing disconnects, not preventing them
36:45 – The origins (and naturalness) of feeling abandoned
39:00 – Our brains are constantly evaluating, moment by moment, whether we’re safe (or not)
44:20 – The importance of showing up for the most vulnerable parts of each other
46.30 – We should all bring our “crazy” to our work
48:00 – Men, when given the right container and guidance, have incredible emotional wisdom
52:00 – What vulnerability REALLY looks like
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS
55:00 – Key Insight: Your vulnerability is your greatest strength. Whenever you’re in a disconnected moment with your partner, you’re in a systemic partner, not a you or them problem. 
56:00 – Key Mentor: My Father, Gabor Mate
57:45 – Key Resource: The Blind Boy Podcast
59:45 – Key Investment: Front loader cargo bike
1:01:20 – Key Practice: Appreciation Exercise – Download Here
RESOURCES
“The Conflict Solution: Learning to Love Better” … get 50% off with coupon code “MENTHISWAY”
yes 1:10:37
How Porn Ruined My Intimacy (048) https://bryanreeves.com/porn-ruined-intimacy-048/ Thu, 14 May 2020 21:42:35 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47850 When was the last time you watched porn? Could porn be negatively affecting your sexuality? Do you ever turn to, or prefer porn, over an actual partner? Have you ever used porn to get turned on for a partner? (even if just in your imagination?) If you ejaculate fast with a partner, or struggle to ... <a title="How Porn Ruined My Intimacy (048)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/porn-ruined-intimacy-048/" aria-label="More on How Porn Ruined My Intimacy (048)">Read more</a> When was the last time you watched porn? Could porn be negatively affecting your sexuality? Do you ever turn to, or prefer porn, over an actual partner? Have you ever used porn to get turned on for a partner? (even if just in your imagination? When was the last time you watched porn?
Could porn be negatively affecting your sexuality?
Do you ever turn to, or prefer porn, over an actual partner?
Have you ever used porn to get turned on for a partner? (even if just in your imagination?)
If you ejaculate fast with a partner, or struggle to at all, could porn be to blame?
How do you know if quitting would help?

Today I’m talking porn. 
I decided to do this episode now after talking to a few close friends of mine who shared that they’ve struggled to kick their porn habit, which became even more pronounced during their solo time in quarantine.
I get it. I believe the use porn for self-pleasure may be one of the most difficult issues a man may face in his lifetime, given the ubiquity of it, and given it can satisfy, at least psychologically, our biological need to ejaculate into another human. After all porn has literally become an endless stream of visually appealing sexual partners living in the very palm of our hands, ready to get down at a moment’s notice!
Which can have very real consequences for our relationships with the actual humans in our midst.
So we men need to talk about this. 
Women, if you’re listening, I only ask that you hold what you’re about to hear in this episode with compassion. Just know, this is a really challenging issue for a man, for all kinds of reasons. If you’re with a partner who’s using porn and you don’t like it, it’s helpful to find ways to talk about it, as partners, that aren’t merely directive or shaming or blaming, but that are still honoring of your experience, too. I know, so many women are negatively affected by their partner’s use of porn … and so often that partner won’t even acknowledge it.
If porn is a real problem in your relationship, I encourage you to get support, whether from a coach, or therapist, even someone who really specializes in this. 
Just know this: it doesn’t have to be diagnosed as an “addiction” for it to nonetheless be harmful to the relationship.
It’s important to me that you know I do not promote sexual shaming in any way, and I am not anti-porn. In this episode, I’m simply going to invite you to explore how online pornography might affect the experience and expression of your sexuality, and impact your relationship. 
Because for a time, in my late 30s and early 40s, it sure fucked up my sexuality, so to speak, and negatively affected my intimate relationships with women.
Back in 2014 I wrote a few blogs about my personal experience with pornography that were both wildly popular, and also controversial. Read by millions of people all over the world, republished on other blog sites and shared across social media, while many men AND women could relate to my experience, whether they themselves were or had experienced some form of negative affects of using porn, or whether they had a partner who was using porn and it caused problems in the relationship. Still, not everyone agreed with my conclusions that porn was bad for a man’s sexual health. 
In this episode, I’m gonna share my experience with what I’ll call a mild porn addiction, including what happened to my body, that scared the living shit out of me, which was why I quit using porn, and why I generally think you should, too. I’ll share 6 reasons why I believe men should quit porn, and I’ll also share 5 warning signs that, if you’re experiencing any of them, you should seriously consider giving up using porn, because it ain’t serving you.
Of course, who am I to tell another man what he should or shouldn’t think or do, so in the end this is obviously your call to make.
I’m a heterosexual man, so I speak to my experience with porn through a male heterosexual filter. If you’re a woman, or don’t see through my particular filter, well, I’ve no doubt this will be a profound episode for you just the same,]]>
Bryan Reeves 49:56
The Power of Stopping (Before Starting) w/ Tommy Rosen (047) https://bryanreeves.com/stop-before-start-047/ Fri, 17 Apr 2020 20:20:11 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47820 What is the real addiction this pandemic is forcing us to face? When your world suddenly stops, what’s the most inspired way to get it started again? Tommy Rosen, founder of Recovery 2.0, is one of the reasons I love living in Los Angeles. I first met Tommy years ago when the conscious music band ... <a title="The Power of Stopping (Before Starting) w/ Tommy Rosen (047)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/stop-before-start-047/" aria-label="More on The Power of Stopping (Before Starting) w/ Tommy Rosen (047)">Read more</a> What is the real addiction this pandemic is forcing us to face? When your world suddenly stops, what’s the most inspired way to get it started again? Tommy Rosen, founder of Recovery 2.0, is one of the reasons I love living in Los Angeles. What is the real addiction this pandemic is forcing us to face?
When your world suddenly stops, what’s the most inspired way to get it started again?

Tommy Rosen, founder of
Recovery 2.0, is one of the reasons I love living in Los Angeles.
I first met Tommy years ago when the conscious music band I was managing performed in his spacious living room for about 100 beautiful brilliant and talented Los Angeles people …   I’ve since come to know Tommy as a deeply wise man. He’s actually a renowned Kundalini Yoga teacher – which I’d tried a few times and decided immediately I didn’t like – until I did a 3-day workshop where Tommy taught Kundalini Yoga twice a day, morning and evening, all 3 days. I went with it, and 3 days later my neck and back felt free of strain and pain for the first time in years. Ever since, I’ve incorporated into my morning practice a simple breathing practice I learned from him that weekend, and it continues to make my body and mind feel better. 
Now, I’ve actually wanted to get Tommy on “Men, This Way” since I first conceived of this podcast, but it just didn’t come together. Tommy and his wife, Kia Miller, another world-renowned Yogi in her own right, travel incessantly. 
In fact, I was inspired to re-invite Tommy to the podcast just last week, after reconnecting with him on a quarantine-inspired zoom call with a few friends. Because he said a few things that deeply resonated with me about how he’s experiencing this great time of what could be considered global shutdown and personal upheaval.
We’ll dive into that in our conversation. 
Last thing I want to say about Tommy is he is not just a survivor of addiction, he’s a world-renowned leader in the realm of addiction-recovery, as the founder and host of the Online Conference Series, “Recovery 2.0: Beyond Addiction” … leading Recovery 2.0 retreats and workshops internationally, and presenting regularly at yoga conferences and festivals. Tommy’s first book, Recovery 2.0: Move Beyond Addiction and Upgrade Your Life, was published by Hay House in October 2014. He was recently a featured guest on Russel Brand’s podcast, Under the Skin, and he’s just all around a wise, and good dude.
Definitely stay tuned for Tommy’s 5 Key Takeaway’s – Quarantine Edition – at the end.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6.00: Tommy caught the last flight out of INDIA before shutdown
10.15: Before we start, we must first stop
14.20: A world with same thoughts
17.00: Yoga: a idea for everybody
21.00: Insight into what is emerging as this virus ends life as we know it
25.00: What is emerging is a new world of people helping people
26.30: Our collective awakenings inspired by coronavirus
29.24: The critical importance of having a daily Morning Practice
32.00: Exploring the distinction of “Inspired action” vs. “Anxious action”
37.00: Faith in life as a pathway to not getting lost in anxiety
39.00: The power of 3 words: “Not My Preference”
40.50: The MYTH that we (men) are alone and on our own.
46.00: Tommy’s and Kia’s practices for navigating quarantine together
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS
49.10: Key Insight: Meditation is the most important practice!
50.00: Key Mentors:

* Guru Prem Singh Khalsa 
* Pujya Swami Chidanand Saraswatiji
* 57:27 Why ‘The Feminine’ Will Destroy You (and You Need Her To) (046) https://bryanreeves.com/feminine-will-destroy-you-046/ Sat, 28 Mar 2020 18:45:41 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47800 As this coronavirus pandemic has been unfolding, I’ve been replaying over and over in my mind that scene from the movie Avatar, at the end, where Pandora – that’s the name of the planet the movie takes place on – marshals all her resources, all the creatures of the planet, to come together to fight ... <a title="Why ‘The Feminine’ Will Destroy You (and You Need Her To) (046)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/feminine-will-destroy-you-046/" aria-label="More on Why ‘The Feminine’ Will Destroy You (and You Need Her To) (046)">Read more</a> As this coronavirus pandemic has been unfolding, I’ve been replaying over and over in my mind that scene from the movie Avatar, at the end, where Pandora – that’s the name of the planet the movie takes place on – marshals all her resources, As this coronavirus pandemic has been unfolding, I’ve been replaying over and over in my mind that scene from the movie Avatar, at the end, where Pandora – that’s the name of the planet the movie takes place on – marshals all her resources, all the creatures of the planet, to come together to fight off the threat that is man.
You see, man has landed on the planet Pandora, because she is teeming with a precious metal called unobtanium – yes, unobtainium – and man is doing everything it can to extract that metal from her ground in his endless pursuit of productivity and progress … he is fully willing to destroy Pandora and all the  “savage and uncivilized” occupants who are essentially the protagonist heroes of the story – and who know themselves to be PART of Pandora … they don’t just live on her; they are part OF her … INSEPARABLE … CONNECTED … and in this climactic scene Pandora is bringing it, all the chaos and destruction she can muster against this voracious appetite of man who is mercilessly hurting her out of pure self-interest.
I can’t help but see the parallel between this moment in Avatar, and what we’re now going through with this pandemic that is forcing us all to just STOP doing whatever we thought was so damn important to be doing.
In this episode I revisit a blog I wrote that speaks to this deeper perfection of what we’re now experiencing, that I believe is essential to humanity’s collective evolution:
“You Can’t Be King Until You Embrace Feminine Energy

“The Great Gift of ‘The Feminine’ that most men – and most women, too – fail to grasp: She orients us towards Love.
When we refuse to embrace Her influence in our lives, we orient towards stuff that doesn’t matter – money, orgasm, self-inflation.”

3 KEY TAKEAWAYS (listen to the episode for details)
 
1. Masculine ambition is futile and misdirected unless oriented towards the feminine principles of love and connectedness.
2. The masculine will always resist the way of the feminine, and vice versa.
3. The feminine will always rise up to come kicking our asses until we learn to fully embrace and welcome her into our worlds.
RESOURCES
“Love, Sex, Relationship Magic” Audio Program
“Conflict to Connection” 90-Day Couples Program
 
 
 
]]> Bryan Reeves Why ‘The Feminine’ Will Destroy You (and You Need Her To) (046) yes 47:13 How To Date (and Love) Authentically, Powerfully w/ Joshua Hathaway and Robert Schwenkler (045) https://bryanreeves.com/date-love-joshua-robert-045/ Tue, 17 Mar 2020 19:41:51 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47787 Do you ever repress your desires for fear of being judged or rejected? Do you know how to lead powerfully with authenticity in the dating world? Are you turned off (and secretly fascinated) by the pick-up artist world? In this episode, my guests, Joshua Hathaway and Robert Schwenkler, and I, mine these questions and more ... <a title="How To Date (and Love) Authentically, Powerfully w/ Joshua Hathaway and Robert Schwenkler (045)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/date-love-joshua-robert-045/" aria-label="More on How To Date (and Love) Authentically, Powerfully w/ Joshua Hathaway and Robert Schwenkler (045)">Read more</a> Do you ever repress your desires for fear of being judged or rejected? Do you know how to lead powerfully with authenticity in the dating world? Are you turned off (and secretly fascinated) by the pick-up artist world? In this episode, my guests, Do you ever repress your desires for fear of being judged or rejected?
Do you know how to lead powerfully with authenticity in the dating world?
Are you turned off (and secretly fascinated) by the pick-up artist world?

In this episode, my guests, Joshua Hathaway and Robert Schwenkler, and I, mine these questions and more to make a meaningful difference in your life. 
Quick note:  Although in this episode we’ll talk largely in the context of men interested in dating, what we explore is absolutely applicable to men (and women, really) who are already in relationships, too. So please consider listening even whether or not you’re currently in the dating phase.
I’ve known personally both Joshua and Robert for a number of years now, and I have massive respect for them both.
Amongst other worthy endeavors, they’re the co-founders of both the Brotherhood Community and Authentic Dating Secrets, a training program that helps men learn how to date with integrity, authenticity, transparency, honesty, and true generosity … essentially they’re helping men learn how to connect to their hearts and their balls, and date from that place. In my experience, when a man learns to live connected to both his heart AND his balls (and his brains) well, he creates the most thrilling, most powerful, most rewarding, and most generous experiences … not just for himself, but for ANYONE who’s lucky enough to date him!
In this episode we talk about both the challenges and the rewards of being authentic and vulnerable while dating – which applies to long-term relationships, too – as well as the limitations of pick-up artistry, and what may happen when a man begins the shift from dating to actual relationship with someone, and a lot more …
Also, I want to acknowledge that in this episode, we are basically three heterosexual men talking about the challenges and adventures of dating, and we frame most of our conversation in a heterosexual context. So, like with everything I write, record, or produce, please just take what resonates, and discard the rest.
This is a profound episode, so I encourage you to definitely stay tuned for Joshua’s and Robert’s 3 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way. 
Also, they host an epic non-pick-up-artist dating course for men, where you get to work with them directly, called “Authentic Dating Secrets” … and if you’re interested in learning with them – and they’re genuinely just good men – go find their flagship dating program at
www.authenticdatingsecrets.com/bryan … (please add that /bryan in there so they know, and I know, you came from listening to this).
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:44 ~ Pick Up Artistry and Pick Up Artists (PUA)
7:45 ~ Robert’s background and experience
10:42 ~ Joshua’s background and experience
13:48 ~ The biggest challenges men are experiencing in dating
16:56 ~ “Nice Guys” and “The Friend Zone”
20:18 ~ Responsibly expressing desire
23:23 ~ Men and vulnerability in dating
26:14 ~ PUA tricks and what it attracts
28:21 ~ Men feeling “too emotionally available”
31:58 ~ What makes their gatherings of men special
36:04 ~ Challenges men face in the transition from dating to being in a relationship
42:04 ~ Letting go of being single
47:17 ~ “3 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
47:31 ~ Honesty is one of the sexiest things that you can bring to a woman
47:48 ~ Your desire is good
48:08 ~ There are extraordinary possibilities in the dating and sex world when you choose to do inner work
49:20 ~ Robert and Joshua’s program “Authentic Dating Secrets”
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Robert and Joshua @  yes 57:43
Why You Must Do The One Thing (You Love) Every Day (044) https://bryanreeves.com/the-one-thing-you-love-044/ Wed, 19 Feb 2020 01:56:24 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47769 What is the one thing you know you should be doing everyday to ensure you have an epic day? Are you regularly doing it? If not, why not? … Are you aware of the cost? In this episode, inspired by a conversation I had just last night,  I’m gonna share with you both my triumphs ... <a title="Why You Must Do The One Thing (You Love) Every Day (044)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/the-one-thing-you-love-044/" aria-label="More on Why You Must Do The One Thing (You Love) Every Day (044)">Read more</a> What is the one thing you know you should be doing everyday to ensure you have an epic day? Are you regularly doing it? If not, why not? … Are you aware of the cost? In this episode, inspired by a conversation I had just last night, Are you regularly doing it?
If not, why not? … Are you aware of the cost?

In this episode, inspired by a conversation I had just last night,  I’m gonna share with you both my triumphs and my struggles around simply living each day well – you know, going to bed deeply satisfied each night because I had the strong sense that I kicked ass that day and lived well. One of the things I’ve long struggled with is thinking I know what I must do to be successful, and yet I neverseem to really have that figured out! So I’ll share with you one of my key commitments that has really paved the way for my greatest success, and what happened when I stopped honoring that commitment due to the challenges that then came with all the success!  
At the end I’ll share my 3 key takeaways, which I think will be really inspiring for you, and help orient you on your own path to living your own life well each day … So, definitely stay tuned through to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
My Morning Guided Meditation

 
A Kyle Cease Video

 
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves 46:07
Where Do We Go From Here (043) https://bryanreeves.com/where-go-043/ Tue, 24 Dec 2019 05:55:58 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47704 In this episode I share with you how 2019 was for this podcast, including specific download numbers and insights, and also 4 powerful lessons I learned doing this. Also, given it’s the end of 2019, I share my Life Theme Mantra process and invite you to create your own for 2020 (see video below – ... <a title="Where Do We Go From Here (043)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/where-go-043/" aria-label="More on Where Do We Go From Here (043)">Read more</a> In this episode I share with you how 2019 was for this podcast, including specific download numbers and insights, and also 4 powerful lessons I learned doing this. Also, given it’s the end of 2019, I share my Life Theme Mantra process and invite you to... In this episode I share with you how 2019 was for this podcast, including specific download numbers and insights, and also 4 powerful lessons I learned doing this.
Also, given it’s the end of 2019, I share my
Life Theme Mantra process and invite you to create your own for 2020 (see video below – my mantra for 2020 is “My Year of Hell Yes!”)
Finally, I’ll answer a really great question from a new listener, Martin, who heard the last episode where I talked about some key differences between merely surviving and actually thriving in life, and wrote in to ask, essentially, how does masculinity evolve from here! .. I’ll share some really interesting thoughts and insights into that, as well … so definitely stay tuned to the end of this short episode of Men This Way …
Alright …
Let’s Dive …
SHOW NOTES
Amazing Year … 42 episodes … 55k downloads!
Most listened to episodes of 2019:
(1) E27 – Choose Her Everyday Or Leave Her
(2) E23 – Why Men Sex (Porn) to Avoid Pain
(3) E18 – Why My Girlfriend Was Always Angry With Me
4 Key Lessons from Podcasting This Year
(1) You never know what’s going to work.
(2) Don’t do it if it you’re not inspired to do it (because life is a momentum game).
(3) Be supportive – we gotta have each other’s backs.
(4) Be willing to NOT know how things are supposed to go.
RESOURCES

]]> Bryan Reeves yes 43:33 Stop This Tragic Cycle (Ruining Your Relationship) (042) https://bryanreeves.com/tragic-cycle-ruining-relationship-042/ Fri, 06 Dec 2019 23:25:30 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47678 Ever been stuck in a relationship cycle of disagreement, arguing, then breakdown? Do you dismiss feelings – yours or another’s – as invalid when they don’t make sense to you? Do you ache for more harmony and ease in intimate relationship? In this episode I dive into my popular blog: Stop This Tragic Cycle In ... <a title="Stop This Tragic Cycle (Ruining Your Relationship) (042)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/tragic-cycle-ruining-relationship-042/" aria-label="More on Stop This Tragic Cycle (Ruining Your Relationship) (042)">Read more</a> Ever been stuck in a relationship cycle of disagreement, arguing, then breakdown? Do you dismiss feelings – yours or another’s – as invalid when they don’t make sense to you? Do you ache for more harmony and ease in intimate relationship? Ever been stuck in a relationship cycle of disagreement, arguing, then breakdown?
Do you dismiss feelings – yours or another’s – as invalid when they don’t make sense to you?
Do you ache for more harmony and ease in intimate relationship?

In this episode I dive into my popular blog:
Stop This Tragic Cycle In Your Relationship
Whether or not you’re in a relationship, this is going to be meaningful to you, because I believe this tragic cycle isn’t really about what is happening with another person, but rather what is happening with YOU, on this inside, and it’s just showing UP in your dynamics with others, and especially your intimate partner …
This happens in all relationships, straight, gay, and otherwise.
I’m talking about a masculine-feminine dynamic, which does NOT mean a man-woman dynamic. As I just stated, this tragic cycle is playing out inside us all … but for the sake of ease and illustration, I’m going to talk about it in the broadest sense that I’ve seen it, in coaching couples the last 6 years, and in my own relationship experiences too. That is, I’ll frame it as a Man-Woman dynamic, but again, I STRESS!!! … if you’re a man, and you relate more to what I describe as a woman’s experience, go with it. Same if you’re in a same sex-relationship. Don’t get tripped up by the details – like what genitalia you have – just take what resonates for you and discard the rest.
But if you want to truly thrive in this lifetime, and experience TRUE FREEDOM along the way, keep listening … hopefully you’ll understand why I say that, shortly …
Definitely stay tuned for my 3 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
“The Boundaries Program: Relationships Suck Without Boundaries!”

“Conflict to Connection” 90-Day Couples Program

“Love, Sex, Relationship Magic” Audio Program

]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 31:45
5 Signs A Man Is Connected to Heart (041) https://bryanreeves.com/5-signs-connected-heart-041/ Wed, 27 Nov 2019 21:25:47 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47628 Why is it important for a man to learn how to connect to his heart? What does it really look like when a man is connected to his heart? How can a man connect to heart without disconnecting from his balls? In this episode, I dive into those questions by diving into one of my ... <a title="5 Signs A Man Is Connected to Heart (041)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/5-signs-connected-heart-041/" aria-label="More on 5 Signs A Man Is Connected to Heart (041)">Read more</a> Why is it important for a man to learn how to connect to his heart? What does it really look like when a man is connected to his heart? How can a man connect to heart without disconnecting from his balls? In this episode, Why is it important for a man to learn how to connect to his heart?
What does it really look like when a man is connected to his heart?
How can a man connect to heart without disconnecting from his balls?

In this episode, I dive into those questions by diving into one of my popular blogs, 5 Signs a Man is Connected to Heart for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life. 
I’ve worked with so many deeply well-intentioned men, even highly successful men, business owners, military commanders, even other coaches, who couldn’t really connect with or feel their own hearts – and they only knew that because despite all their successes, despite having even the relationship they thought they’d always wanted, on  some deep, essential level, they nonetheless couldn’t enjoy it or thrive in the experiencing of it all.
Actually, it’s a curious and tragic thing, that so many men won’t begin to even explore what it means to be connected to heart, until they’ve lost what they later realized was most important to them.
I had that experience, when Silvy and I broke up just 6 months into our relationship.
That’s why I’m such a big fan of fully empowering women, because often I see that it’s a deeply empowered woman, one who is no longer willing to tolerate a disconnected man’s behavior because she’s no longer willing to suffer the hurts of his actions, who turns out to be the catalyst for a man to finally realize he MUST connect with his heart.
And I am talking about my journey, my friends.
So … definitely stay tuned today for my 5 Key Practices, any of which you can choose to work with for the next 7 days, to help you connect more deeply to your heart, at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
“The Boundaries Program: Relationships Suck Without Boundaries!”
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 41:53
There Are No Evil Atoms w/ Leigh McCloskey (040) https://bryanreeves.com/no-evil-atoms-leigh-mccloskey-040/ Mon, 18 Nov 2019 20:30:07 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47594 Have you considered whether the daily questions you live in are sourced in fear? Or in wonder? Do you regularly spend time with what truly matters to you? Where do you go when you can’t run away (from your challenges) anymore? This is one of my favorite conversations I’ve ever had with another human being. ... <a title="There Are No Evil Atoms w/ Leigh McCloskey (040)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/no-evil-atoms-leigh-mccloskey-040/" aria-label="More on There Are No Evil Atoms w/ Leigh McCloskey (040)">Read more</a> Have you considered whether the daily questions you live in are sourced in fear? Or in wonder? Do you regularly spend time with what truly matters to you? Where do you go when you can’t run away (from your challenges) anymore? Have you considered whether the daily questions you live in are sourced in fear? Or in wonder?
Do you regularly spend time with what truly matters to you?
Where do you go when you can’t run away (from your challenges) anymore?

This is one of my favorite conversations I’ve ever had with another human being.
Because I am a philosopher at heart, and Leigh McCloskey is one of the most intriguing, fascinating, inspired and inspiring minds alive on the planet today.
While Leigh was a famous TV actor back in the day, a regular on TV shows like General Hospital and Dallas, and countless other daytime soaps and movies and shows like Star Trek and BattleStar Galactica, I’ve only ever personally known him as one of the most fascinating minds alive today, for in addition to being a strongly grounded human being, he is also a visionary artist and plugged-in-to-the-mystical-realms philosopher.
I first met Leigh in person at his home in Malibu.
I had no idea what I was in for when a friend invited me to a small movie screening one evening Leigh and his wife, Carla, were hosting.
From the outside, his home, just a short walk from the wild Pacific Ocean, looked more or less like any modest Malibu home, by which I mean it wasn’t some grotesque mega-mansion snubbing its nose at the land and everyone around it, but rather a beautiful and expansive 2-story country home, sweetly nestled into the trees and hills surrounding it, the kinda place you’d expect to be welcomed with a glass of iced-lemonade and stories on the porch before retiring to a guest bedroom bigger than your living room.
But what I stepped into was far beyond anything I’d ever imagined before.
After the 9/11 tragedy in 2001, Leigh went to work on turning his entire 2nd floor into an artwork of epic, visionary proportions, the likes of which I’ve only seen rivaled in places like Salvador Dali’s fantastic home in Spain and artist Alex Grey’s mind-bending Chapel of Sacred Mirrors in New York City.
Anyway, I can’t even begin to describe Leigh’s home, and I want to get into this conversation, which, I caution you, you will have to listen deeply, and you may have to listen a few times, because interspersed throughout what may seem like an intensely philosophical conversation, Leigh says some of the most beautiful and profound things you’ll ever hear: like, “there are no evil atoms,” and, “I have to tell my wife and my daughters, it is their love that has healed me,” … and “We are coming out of the age of the father – I think therefore I am – and entering the age of the mother (“i love therefore I am”)”
So, grab your lemonade and a seat on the porch – I saved a rocking chair for you – and listen well, all the way through to Leigh’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:33 ~ The recent Malibu fire
7:32 ~ “There are no evil atoms”
11:02 ~ Living well and navigating life
16:07 ~ Coming out of the age of the father, and into the age of the mother
23:20 ~ The modern disconnect between success and relationships
30:12 ~ The questions of life
38:33 ~ Defining our values without reference to others
41:17 ~ Returning home and intimacy
45:03 ~ The role of the Devil in our lives
51:50 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
56:14 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
56:22 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Trust yourself.
57:17 ~ KEY MENTOR TO LEARN FROM: W. Brugh Joy (Author and Doctor), Ralph Waldo Emerson (Philosopher and Poet), William Blake (Poet and Painter)
59:22 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): BlacKKKlansman (Movie), Dave Wexler (Director), Flying Lotus (Musician), as well as “Memories, Dreams, and Reflections” by Carl Jung (Book)
1:01:01 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on,]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:09:26
Learn to Shift Your Mindset (Fastest Way to Change Your Life) (039) https://bryanreeves.com/shift-mindset-change-life-039/ Mon, 11 Nov 2019 23:37:21 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47568 Are you sure it’s your circumstances holding you back? Are you sure you don’t have everything you want because of too many things outside your control? Could it be that your mindset has far more affect on your life than your circumstances? Could it be that simply changing your mindset, can change your life profoundly? ... <a title="Learn to Shift Your Mindset (Fastest Way to Change Your Life) (039)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/shift-mindset-change-life-039/" aria-label="More on Learn to Shift Your Mindset (Fastest Way to Change Your Life) (039)">Read more</a> Are you sure it’s your circumstances holding you back? Are you sure you don’t have everything you want because of too many things outside your control? Could it be that your mindset has far more affect on your life than your circumstances? Are you sure it’s your circumstances holding you back?
Are you sure you don’t have everything you want because of too many things outside your control?
Could it be that your mindset has far more affect on your life than your circumstances?
Could it be that simply changing your mindset, can change your life profoundly?

In this episode, I mine these questions and more for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
In fact, in this episode I’m going to share a few deeply personal experiences when working to shift my own mindset changed everything for me. In fact, I’ve discovered that simply working harder, at whatever I’m doing, basically never works, at least not to bring me the experiences I want most.  
Yet working with my mindset always has. 
Now, I don’t do a good job of talking about science, or formal research, in my work. Which is interesting …
But a lot of what I’m going to share with you today may be confronting to the part of you that wants to hear the science, but that’s the part of you that also argues you can’t have what you want, if you don’t see the money for it in your bank account. 
And that’s exactly the part of you I WANT to confront today.
There’s tons of books, some have reached icon status, like Think and Grow Rich, (Napolean Hill) and “How to Win Friends and Influence People”  (Dale Carnegie) … 
Even my current teaching guide, Joe Dispenza’s “Breaking The Habit of Being Yourself” … which I believe will become iconic – and by the way he does a GREAT job of breaking down the science of how this mindset shifting game works, by illuminating how your thoughts unleash a biochemical chain reaction that ultimately creates your daily destiny, and how your thoughts get stored in your body, thus in a way becoming like your unconscious mind that makes all your choices for you … you know, like you know you’re doing things that aren’ good for you, like working too much, or smoking, or excessive video games or porn use, or eating, or not exercising … and yet you continue the pattern … because your subconscious mind, programmed into your body, and never confronted or dealt with in an effective way, it’s running the show. That’s why your life essentially continues to look the same, no matter how much harder you work at it, or how much money you have, etc.
I believe we are on the leading edge of a profound paradigm shift … learning to tap into a deeper wisdom than just our rational minds. 
It’s my hope today that this episode turns on a light inside you, or rather turns UP the wattage on the one already burning, so that you realize you are much closer to everything you want than you may now think, and that it has nothing to do with your bank account, or the condition of your body, or your parent’s disapproval, or who’s in political office, or the fact that you don’t have a partner, or that you do … but rather, it has everything to do with your mindset.
So definitely stay tuned through to the end where I share my 3 Key Takeaways on Mindset work at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Finally, if you want to share feedback or share what this conversation inspired in you, email me directly at bryan@bryanreeves.com … I’d love to hear your thoughts … 
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
3 Key Takeaways:
(1) Working harder can create incremental changes in your life. But only working to create a new mindset can create massive changes quickly.
(2) It’s exceedingly difficult to do reliable mindset work without support. After all, you can’t see what you can’t see.
(3) Your mindset, in any given moment, is rooted in only either fear, or love. You choose.
RESOURCES
Joe Dispenza’s MUST-READ BOOK:  yes 1:09:40
Fix Less, Feel More (You’ll Feel Better) w/ Joshua Wenner (038) https://bryanreeves.com/fix-less-joshua-wenner-038/ Sat, 28 Sep 2019 18:13:03 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47496 Do you ever feel emotionally … stuck? Ever say (think) you’re over something when you’re just not? Could so many of your so-called “problems” actually resolve themselves if you could just BE with your feelings? (hint: yes) I love what Joshua Wenner is up to in the world, in particular his work to help men ... <a title="Fix Less, Feel More (You’ll Feel Better) w/ Joshua Wenner (038)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/fix-less-joshua-wenner-038/" aria-label="More on Fix Less, Feel More (You’ll Feel Better) w/ Joshua Wenner (038)">Read more</a> Do you ever feel emotionally … stuck? Ever say (think) you’re over something when you’re just not? Could so many of your so-called “problems” actually resolve themselves if you could just BE with your feelings? Do you ever feel emotionally … stuck?
Ever say (think) you’re over something when you’re just not?
Could so many of your so-called “problems” actually resolve themselves if you could just BE with your feelings? (hint: yes)

I love what Joshua Wenner is up to in the world, in particular his work to help men heal from deep physical and emotional trauma.
While he does a lot of things, one thing I want you to know is that he leads emotional resiliency trainings up in the mountains west of Los Angeles for first responders, like policeman and fireman, and you’ll hear some remarkable stories in this episode about what becomes possible when men start simply being willing to open up about the hard day they just had with spouses and children; how that can even save lives.
Despite being exposed to death throughout his childhood and young adult years, including a stint in the National Guard during which he deployed to Iraq for Operation Iraqi Freedom, Josh’s real journey into grief and emotional literacy, or resiliency, really began after losing his brother in 2007 to addiction. Just three days after his brother had asked to come live with him, and he said ‘no’. He shares that story of what happened in this podcast. But that moment launched him into what has been a lifelong journey of grieving and healing and teaching men the same. He’s actually working on a documentary series called
Grief to Grace, and the trailer is just electrifying, inspiring, heartwarming and touching. Go watch it!
I’ve been able to spend some time with Joshua this last year in a variety of settings, including a men’s group called Man Cave Elite that we’re both part of, brought together by a mutual friend, Preston Smiles, who was also a guest back in the early days of this podcast.
Anyways, I just really like Joshua. He’s easy to be around and clearly a deep soul who has been through a lot in life. Today we talk about men and loss, the ways we pretend and distract from our pain, the hidden costs of our suffering to both ourselves and our loved ones, and what we can do to begin healing every day from the everyday pains we suffer. So we can get our lives back and actually live with vitality, true contentment, and even joy. We both share some great practices that we do ourselves and we offer the people we work with to help process your pain in ways that are safe, constructive, and serve not just you but everyone around you. So definitely stay tuned for Joshua’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way.
Alright…
Let’s dive…
SHOW NOTES
6:01 – Disagreeing in Partnership and more on Joshua’s Grief to Grace series
9:15 – Joshua’s Forgiveness Ceremony (11 years running) and Grief Yoga
13:34 – Emotional Forgiveness
17:01 – The Metaphor of Emotional Loss to Physical Pain
22:00 – Sitting with Pain
24:50 – The Importance of Grieving and Joshua’s Journey
30:00 – Fixing vs. Accepting
34:50 – Not Moving on too Fast and Allowing Yourself to Feel Anger
37:45 – Awareness: Pain Not Shame
40:15 – Sitting with Your Feelings
45:10 – How Limiting One Emotion Suppresses the Rest
48:22 – Core Wounds
53:45 – Isolation and Loneliness ???? Building a Community of Men you can Trust
JOSHUA’S 5 KEY TAKEAWAYS
54:28 ~ KEY TAKEAWAY 1: Love your body the way it loves you
55:41 ~ KEY TAKEAWAY 2: Mentor – Ken Druck
56:46 ~ KEY TAKEAWAY 3: Key Resource – The King, Warrior, Magician and Lover by Robert Moore and Douglas Gi...]]> Bryan Reeves yes 1:05:38 Stop Seeking Success (Let It Find You, Instead) w/ Sam Ryter (037) https://bryanreeves.com/stop-seeking-success-sam-ryter-037/ Thu, 19 Sep 2019 21:07:10 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47482 Are you “trying too hard” to succeed … Could that be getting in the way of success? What if “letting go” was the fastest way to the success you dream of? Could the same hold true for relationship success? Sam Ryter is actually a former coaching client of mine. We worked together in the first ... <a title="Stop Seeking Success (Let It Find You, Instead) w/ Sam Ryter (037)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/stop-seeking-success-sam-ryter-037/" aria-label="More on Stop Seeking Success (Let It Find You, Instead) w/ Sam Ryter (037)">Read more</a> Are you “trying too hard” to succeed … Could that be getting in the way of success? What if “letting go” was the fastest way to the success you dream of? Could the same hold true for relationship success? Sam Ryter is actually a former coaching client ... Are you “trying too hard” to succeed … Could that be getting in the way of success?
What if “letting go” was the fastest way to the success you dream of?
Could the same hold true for relationship success?

Sam Ryter is actually a former coaching client of mine. We worked together in the first half of 2018, and through our work Sam’s approach to life, to his work, his creativity, and his intimate relationship, changed dramatically.
I invited him onto “Men, This Way” because a few months ago I got an email from him with an update that so deeply touched and inspired me.
He actually proposed coming on to the podcast to share his experience coaching with me and all the magic that’s been happening for him afterwards. I was a bit reluctant at first, not wanting to be overtly promotional with this podcast, but then I realized that the profound transformation Sam has been experiencing in every aspect of his life, is what EVERY MAN – and really EVERY WOMAN, too – is ACHING to experience in their own lives.
Anyway, Sam is just a really likeable, massive-hearted young man.
His story is also reminiscent of my own in many ways … in fact, when we started working together, I kinda felt like I was working with my 25-year old self, which was pretty cool, actually … 
Sam originally came to me to help mentor him in growing his own coaching business. But what actually happened for him through our work together was far more true to the deepest yearnings of his heart. 
But I’ll let Sam tell the tale … 
In this episode we talk about the courageous practice of surrender, of not trying to succeed, but rather just staying focused on giving your deepest gift to the world, with no attachment to outcome, and allowing success to then find you. We also explore what happened for Sam with his intimate partner, and how the awareness of masculine and femine energies completely shifted his experience of relationship … We talk about that – and more … and definitely stay tuned for Sam’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Finally, if this episode inspires in you the desire to finally work with a mentor, or a coach, yourself, and you think I could be the one to serve you on YOUR journey to creating the life you dream of and were BORN for … email support@bryanreeves.com … and let’s explore working together.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
08:04 ~ Sam’s adventures over the last year
11:47 ~ Letting go of agenda in creative work
15:35 ~ The process behind Sam’s novel
20:08 ~ The magic of surrender
24:42 ~ Control and how liberating it is to let go
29:36 ~ The masculine desire for freedom, and the feminine desire for connection
34:55 ~ The paradox of surrender
39:22 ~ The importance of working with a mentor or coach
44:03 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
44:09 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Finding the balance between freedom and connection within a romantic relationship
46:02 ~ KEY MENTOR TO LEARN FROM: Mooji (Jamaican spiritual teacher)
48:26 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Sam’s book
“Pico Blanco” available
through Amazon
51:00 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Using all his savings to travel to Mexico to write
53:45 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Taking conscious rests, and being lazy when you don’t have to work
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Sam’s Website
yes 1:01:09 The Master Does Nothing (Yet Leaves Nothing Undone) (036) https://bryanreeves.com/master-does-nothing-036/ Sat, 14 Sep 2019 19:54:16 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47468 Does life sometimes seem like an unending sequence of frustrations and disappointments? Do you ever feel like “I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t!” (especially in relationship)? Is it possible that living masterfully actually takes LESS effort than you currently exert? In this episode, we explore LIVING PARADOX: Can you be honest AND ... <a title="The Master Does Nothing (Yet Leaves Nothing Undone) (036)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/master-does-nothing-036/" aria-label="More on The Master Does Nothing (Yet Leaves Nothing Undone) (036)">Read more</a> Does life sometimes seem like an unending sequence of frustrations and disappointments? Do you ever feel like “I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t!” (especially in relationship)? Is it possible that living masterfully actually takes LESS effort than ... Does life sometimes seem like an unending sequence of frustrations and disappointments?
Do you ever feel like “I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t!” (especially in relationship)?
Is it possible that living masterfully actually takes LESS effort than you currently exert?

In this episode, we explore LIVING PARADOX:

* Can you be honest AND kind?
* Can you be horny AND respectful?
* Can you ask for what you want AND be willing to not have it?
* Can you disagree with someone AND validate their experience?

The Tao Does Nothing, But Leaves Nothing Undone.
The Tao Te Ching, an ancient Chinese book of wisdom. Tao is generally translated as the way. Te is power or virtue, and Ching is a book.
More wisdom from the Tao te Ching:
“Those who know do not speak. Those who speak do not know.”
“When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.”
“If you try to change it, you will ruin it. Try to hold it, and you will lose it.”
“To understand the limitation of things, desire them.”
The Master does nothing, yet nothing is left undone.
 
 
RESOURCES
Joe Dispenza’s MUST-READ BOOK:
“Break The Habit of Being Yourself”
An Abraham-Hicks video.
David Deida’s beautiful book, Intimate Communion: Awakening Your Sexual Essence
My “Love, Sex, Relationship Magic“ Program
]]> Bryan Reeves yes 57:35 The Profound Gifts of Heartbreak & Illness w/ Adam Piandes (035) https://bryanreeves.com/profound-gifts-adam-piandes-035/ Thu, 05 Sep 2019 22:19:13 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47454 What are your addictions helping you avoid? Can illness – and heartbreak – be the best gift for you? Do you (ever) make an intimate partner responsible for your pain? Adam Piandes is a dear friend of mine. He and I first met back in 2014 on a 3-hour road trip up the pacific coast ... <a title="The Profound Gifts of Heartbreak & Illness w/ Adam Piandes (035)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/profound-gifts-adam-piandes-035/" aria-label="More on The Profound Gifts of Heartbreak & Illness w/ Adam Piandes (035)">Read more</a> What are your addictions helping you avoid? Can illness – and heartbreak – be the best gift for you? Do you (ever) make an intimate partner responsible for your pain? Adam Piandes is a dear friend of mine. He and I first met back in 2014 on a 3-hour ro... What are your addictions helping you avoid?
Can illness – and heartbreak – be the best gift for you?
Do you (ever) make an intimate partner responsible for your pain?

Adam Piandes is a dear friend of mine.
He and I first met back in 2014 on a 3-hour road trip up the pacific coast to a weekend men’s retreat in an evergreen forest near Santa Barbara. 
There were 4 guys in our car that day. One guy, I’ll never forget because I immediately felt uncomfortable around the moment we shook hands. There was just something about his presence that triggered me into distrust. Another guy, I completely do not remember at all.
Then there was Adam. He and I clicked immediately. 
Both of us from the East Coast, he from Boston, me from Maryland, both having made the big leap to west coast living. Both big basketball fans – not just watching but playing. But what struck me most about Adam, that I would come to most admire about him in just those first few days, was that he was going through an inner hell – an excruciating breakup with a woman, AND a recent cancer diagnosis – and he wasn’t pretending everything was alright. 
In fact, the opposite. 
I’d rarely seen a man – especially one from Boston – really allow himself to grieve the way I saw him grieving that weekend. 
Adam’s a wise dude. He’s a talented and successful leadership coach, working with executives, business leaders, and corporate teams, teaching the art of masterful communication among other essential leadership skills.
Over the last few years, Adam and I have continued to meet every few months with a small group of brilliant, visionary men, where we drop in to celebrate our victories together, share our deep struggles with each other, and challenge each other respectfully, lovingly, firmly, to confront and overcome the struggles that don’t actually serve us.
Adam and I cover profound ground in this conversation, around the distractions of addiction, the depths of heartbreak, the gifts of illness, and more.
Definitely stay tuned for Adam’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
11:18 ~ Significant experiences in Adam’s life
15:13 ~ Breakups and the core issues they bring up
20:53 ~ Looking at symptoms instead of root causes
27:26 ~ The wisdom gained from a thyroid cancer diagnosis
35:33 ~ Entering a journey of healing
39:04 ~ “Going to war” against illness
41:55 ~ Biggest lessons taken from illness and breakup
44:03 ~ Self-compassion and love
46:34 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
48:58 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
49:05 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Be willing to explore the connection between the physical, emotional, and spiritual
50:17 ~ KEY MENTOR TO LEARN FROM: Dave Thomson
52:19 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Resources that connect to the element of play and joy in his life. For example, the Bill Simmons Podcast (Sports Podcast)
54:49 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Purchasing a surfboard
56:08 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Completely dedicating himself to doing work he loves to do
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Adam @ www.AdamPiandes.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:02:47
(Pt 2) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (034) https://bryanreeves.com/beautiful-world-charles-eisenstein-034/ Wed, 28 Aug 2019 09:00:16 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47441 Are you ever discouraged by your limited impact on the world? Do you struggle to find purpose, or perhaps you have purpose yet struggle to balance that and being present with your loved ones? Are you even connected to what you really care about? This is part 2 of my conversation with Charles Eisenstein (Part ... <a title="(Pt 2) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (034)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/beautiful-world-charles-eisenstein-034/" aria-label="More on (Pt 2) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (034)">Read more</a> Are you ever discouraged by your limited impact on the world? Do you struggle to find purpose, or perhaps you have purpose yet struggle to balance that and being present with your loved ones? Are you even connected to what you really care about? Are you ever discouraged by your limited impact on the world?
Do you struggle to find purpose, or perhaps you have purpose yet struggle to balance that and being present with your loved ones?
Are you even connected to what you really care about?

This is part 2 of my conversation with Charles Eisenstein (Part 1 here).
I have a man-crush on Charles. His brilliant mind is plugged into a vision of the world I – and so many others – ache to live in. 
Charles graduated from Yale University with degrees in mathematics and philosophy, and is the author of 5 books, including The Ascent of Humanity and The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know is Possible
In this episode, our core exploration is what it means and looks like to have real impact on the world, and the struggles we tend to face in the face of wanting to create impact. We talk about purpose, and an interesting way to look at the unpredictable consequences of saying yes, or no, to any given opportunity. All that, and much more. 
At the end, I do something a little different and dive deeper into 2 of my own key takeaways from this conversation with Charles Eisenstein, so be sure to stay to the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright … 
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
4:51 ~ Addressing the sense of not mattering in people’s lives
12:06 ~ Creating change
17:49 ~ How to listen to your heart versus your mind
23:05 ~ How to know what to say “yes” to, and what to say “no” to
28:58 ~ What is purpose?
31:54 ~ The common dilemma between our mission and our family
39:28 ~ How we get trapped in false missions in life
45:45 ~ “Stop trying to be a good person”
49:23 ~ What if you could do whatever you wanted?
52:43 ~ The importance of ceremony
MY 2 KEY TAKEAWAYS
56:43 ~ KEY TAKEWAY 1: The distinction between mind and heart
1:01:44 ~ KEY TAKEWAY 2: What do you care about?
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Charles @ www.CharlesEisenstein.org
Charles’s Book: The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know Is Possible (Sacred Activism)
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:07:32
(Pt 1) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (033) https://bryanreeves.com/beautiful-world-charles-eisenstein-033/ Wed, 21 Aug 2019 09:00:48 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47419 You know those people you don’t like … do you really know what it’s like to be them? Do you see yourself as alone in the world, or part of a greater whole? Did you know the current political climate – which has you either upset or checked out – can be liberating for you? ... <a title="(Pt 1) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (033)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/beautiful-world-charles-eisenstein-033/" aria-label="More on (Pt 1) A More Beautiful World w/ Charles Eisenstein (033)">Read more</a> You know those people you don’t like … do you really know what it’s like to be them? Do you see yourself as alone in the world, or part of a greater whole? Did you know the current political climate – which has you either upset or checked out – can be ... You know those people you don’t like … do you really know what it’s like to be them?
Do you see yourself as alone in the world, or part of a greater whole?
Did you know the current political climate – which has you either upset or checked out – can be liberating for you?

I was so excited for this interview with Charles Eisenstein.
After spending the last few days really diving into his work in preparation to talk with him, I woke up at 5am this morning my heart and mind just aflame with inspiration. 
I love what Charles is speaking into the world through his books, his articles, his live presentations. Apparently so does Oprah Winfrey, who recently released her own podcast interview with Charles. 
Charles’ core message – as I experience it – is the acknowledgment of what the great Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh calls our “interbeing” … the awareness and practice of our connectedness to all things, and to each other … what I love in particular about Charles’ work, is he brings that beautiful spiritual notion down to earth in ways us humans can actually work with in our everyday lives and relationships. Charles is a brilliant mind connected to a deeply inspired heart, all held inside the sturdy bones of a grounded and humble man. He graduated from Yale University with degrees in mathematics and philosophy, and is the author of 5 books, including The Ascent of Humanity and The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know is Possible. 
I decided during our conversation to make this part 1 of our exploration together – and he agreed – because there is so much in his deep ocean of wisdom I’m eager to explore, and even 60 minutes in I felt like I was still just doggy paddling on the surface. I truly believe this man offers some of the most crucial insights to assist humanity through the challenging transition we’re now clearly going through, and so I encourage you strongly to stay tuned all the way through to Charles’ 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way … 
Alright … 
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:02 ~ Charles’ early experiences
12:55 ~ Interbeing, interconnectivity, and empathy
17:39 ~ An insightful approach to delay judging people
23:00 ~ The shift from patriarchal systems
27:22 ~ How “masculine” goals can leave us unfulfilled
32:16 ~ “What is like to be you?”
38:20 ~ The story we hold about somebody is an invitation for them to play out that story
40:29 ~ The universal idea of the adversary
45:57 ~ Three “wrong” responses to challenges in intimate relationships
48:51 ~ Hate is a bodyguard for grief
53:59 ~ Looking for what it’s like to be you
57:48 ~ “To create real change in the world we may need to sacrifice being right”
1:02:18 ~ What do I serve?
1:04:28 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
1:04:53 ~ KEY INSIGHT: “If I were in the totality of anyone’s circumstances, I could very well be doing what they’re doing. I’m no better than any other person”
1:05:59 ~ KEY MENTOR TO LEARN FROM: Orland Bishop (Author, Youth Mentor)
1:06:49 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Hayao and Gorō Miyazaki films (namely “Ronja, the Robber’s Daughter”)
1:08:30 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Taking his 14-year-old son on a speaking trip
1:09:45 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Taking a “news fast”
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Charles @ www.CharlesEisenstein.org
And his videos @ www.CharlesEisenstein.org/video/
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:15:12
It Hurts To Live Your Purpose (It Hurts More NOT To!) (032) https://bryanreeves.com/hurts-to-live-your-purpose-032/ Thu, 08 Aug 2019 03:19:18 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47408 Are you struggling to figure out your purpose? Maybe you’re clear on your purpose, but it’s often a struggle to fully live it? Do you fear intimate relationship could get in the way of fulfilling on your purpose? A few days ago, a man wrote these words to me:  Hey Bryan  Recently became aware of ... <a title="It Hurts To Live Your Purpose (It Hurts More NOT To!) (032)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/hurts-to-live-your-purpose-032/" aria-label="More on It Hurts To Live Your Purpose (It Hurts More NOT To!) (032)">Read more</a> Are you struggling to figure out your purpose? Maybe you’re clear on your purpose, but it’s often a struggle to fully live it? Do you fear intimate relationship could get in the way of fulfilling on your purpose? A few days ago, Are you struggling to figure out your purpose?
Maybe you’re clear on your purpose, but it’s often a struggle to fully live it?
Do you fear intimate relationship could get in the way of fulfilling on your purpose?

A few days ago, a man wrote these words to me: 
Hey Bryan 
Recently became aware of you. Was reading some of your blog posts and I noticed a troubling trend. 
Like you The Way of the Superior Man changed my life and path through it. 
It seems to me you have lost sight of 1 of the fundamentals of a Superior Man- 
Purpose above/before woman/feminine. 
A couple of the posts I read were Silvy this, Silvy that, over and over. 
Having a great woman is the best thing in the world. 
Giving her too much of yourself will lose her. 
I wish you all the best. 
I encourage you to reflect on this.
I’ll share my response at the end of this episode.
In this episode, you’ll learn

* Empowering questions to help you reflect on your purpose,
* “4 Key Takeaways” to help you deepen and refine your practice of living your purpose, everyday. 
* Simple practices you can start doing TODAY to help you live with powerful intention, moment by moment by moment. 
* 2 key distinctions to navigating the tension between your purpose … and the needs of relationship.

Definitely stay tuned all the way to the end of this potent episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
RESOURCES
David Deida’s Book: (Paperback) Way Of The Superior Man / (Audio Book) Way of the Superior Man
My Book: “Tell The Truth, Let The Peace Fall Where It May“
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:12:46
How to Make Meditation (and Isolation) Actually Work For You w/ Shinzen Young (031) https://bryanreeves.com/meditation-isolation-shinzen-young-031/ Wed, 31 Jul 2019 19:58:59 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47396 Can you learn to be happy no matter your external conditions? How does meditation, or simple mindfulness, play a big role in that? Don’t see any benefit when you meditate? (try the technique in this episode) Shinzen Young is the author of the groundbreaking book, The Science of Enlightenment. This episode will appeal more to ... <a title="How to Make Meditation (and Isolation) Actually Work For You w/ Shinzen Young (031)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/meditation-isolation-shinzen-young-031/" aria-label="More on How to Make Meditation (and Isolation) Actually Work For You w/ Shinzen Young (031)">Read more</a> Can you learn to be happy no matter your external conditions? How does meditation, or simple mindfulness, play a big role in that? Don’t see any benefit when you meditate? (try the technique in this episode) Shinzen Young is the author of the groundbre... Can you learn to be happy no matter your external conditions?
How does meditation, or simple mindfulness, play a big role in that?
Don’t see any benefit when you meditate? (try the technique in this episode)

Shinzen Young is the author of the groundbreaking book, The Science of Enlightenment.
This episode will appeal more to you if you’re specifically interested in meditation and deep spiritual practice. 
Shinzen Young is first a scientist and researcher, committed to taking, as he says in his book, “the Mist out of Mysticism” … Initially interested in religious thought from a more academic perspective, once he started peering down deep into the well of particularly eastern spiritual traditions, well, seems to me he fell in, and tumbled like Alice down the rabbit hole.
In 1970, for his doctoral dissertation in Buddhist studies at the University of Wisconsin, he actually went to Mount Kōya, a remote mountain monastery in Japan where he trained and ordained as a monk in the Shingon tradition of Buddhism, becoming the first Westerner ever to complete the Shingon basic training. 
From there, his fascinating journey far beyond pure academic interest began.
Shinzen has trained extensively in each of three additional Buddhist traditions: Vajrayana, Zen, and Vipassana, and he has now practiced, taught, and researched meditation for nearly 50 years. 
Being predisposed to science and research, he’s brilliant at illuminating the abstract concepts of meditation with fundamental theories of math and physics. He’s collaborated with neuroscientists at Harvard Medical School, University of Massachusetts Medical School, Yale, Carnegie Mellon, and the University of Vermont, to study meditation’s effects on the brain and body, and in service of his search for technological ways to stimulate and enhance mindfulness in individuals … you know, how to get the benefits of 50 years of meditation practice, say, into 50 minutes! Be forewarned … no one’s figured it out yet.
I spent a lot of time preparing for Shinzen’s interview, studying his materials, reading his brilliant book, even studying with one of his meditation teachers, Steve James, who introduced me to Shinzen’s teachings. But when we began to speak, I immediately felt painfully ill-prepared. The man is brilliant. His wisdom, profound. You’ll see he schools me straightaway as I attempt to ask a relatable question that doesn’t quite land the way I hoped. 
This episode is more technical than many episodes, and I fear I jump around a bit as to make it difficult to follow at times – you can certainly email me at bryan@bryanreeves.com to let me know – but Shinzen takes time to break down a potent mindfulness meditation practice that uses the 6 components of the human experience – what we see, hear, feel, externally, and what we see hear feel, internally – 6 components of our everyday experience that we can focus on in meditation – or anytime we choose to – a technique that can not only make us happier in our lives by helping us make better decisions informed by deeper clarity, but can also ultimately yield an experience of enlightenment, one available to everyone who seeks it … including you. 
So bear with me as I help us find our way, and definitely stay tuned for Shinzen’s 1 Key Insight at the end of this episode of Men, This Way … 
Alright … 
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
9:44 ~ Schools of Buddhism and relationships
15:33 ~ Isolation, loneliness, and happiness
24:18 ~ The dichotomy of the potential benefits and detrimental effects of isolation
...]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:21:04
Why Men Can’t Be Friends With Women They’re Attracted To (And Some Can) (030) https://bryanreeves.com/can-men-be-friends-with-women-030/ Sat, 27 Jul 2019 02:00:24 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47386 Can a man be genuine friends with a woman he’s attracted to? Can you ignore, or transmute, the pull of sexual polarity when it would otherwise threaten your relationship … or simply your peace of mind? Can a relationship survive (even thrive?) when opposite sex friends are in the picture? In this episode, I explore ... <a title="Why Men Can’t Be Friends With Women They’re Attracted To (And Some Can) (030)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/can-men-be-friends-with-women-030/" aria-label="More on Why Men Can’t Be Friends With Women They’re Attracted To (And Some Can) (030)">Read more</a> Can a man be genuine friends with a woman he’s attracted to? Can you ignore, or transmute, the pull of sexual polarity when it would otherwise threaten your relationship … or simply your peace of mind? Can a relationship survive (even thrive? Can a man be genuine friends with a woman he’s attracted to?
Can you ignore, or transmute, the pull of sexual polarity when it would otherwise threaten your relationship … or simply your peace of mind?
Can a relationship survive (even thrive?) when opposite sex friends are in the picture?

In this episode, I explore a very popular blog I wrote, by the same name as this podcast, entitled, Why Men Can’t Be Friends with Women They’re Attracted To (And Some Can)
In this episode, I’ll explore “4 key aspects of a man’s maturity” that determine whether he can be friends with a woman – or another man, for that matter – that he might otherwise be attracted to.
I’ll also share two essential insights into how to make opposite sex friends work FOR your relationship, not against it.
Definitely stay tuned for these 4 Key Aspects, and those extra bonus insights, at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
RESOURCES
Original Blog: Why Men Can’t Be Friends with Women They’re Attracted To (And Some Can)
Blog: Breathing Into “Untimely” Sexual Energy
“Love, Sex, Relationship Magic” Audio Program (15% discount code in the episode)
Men’s Retreats (including Norway)
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 35:44
How Avoiding Honesty (in Love) Ruins Pleasure & Connection w/ Ian Ferguson (029) https://bryanreeves.com/avoiding-honesty-ruins-pleasure-ian-ferguson-029/ Wed, 10 Jul 2019 12:05:21 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47373 Do you genuinely value open communication in relationship, particularly around sex and attractions? Or, like most people, are there some things you really don’t want to hear? Do you get why knowing the difference between the stories your brain tells you, and the sensations your body tells you, is essential for living (and loving) well? ... <a title="How Avoiding Honesty (in Love) Ruins Pleasure & Connection w/ Ian Ferguson (029)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/avoiding-honesty-ruins-pleasure-ian-ferguson-029/" aria-label="More on How Avoiding Honesty (in Love) Ruins Pleasure & Connection w/ Ian Ferguson (029)">Read more</a> Do you genuinely value open communication in relationship, particularly around sex and attractions? Or, like most people, are there some things you really don’t want to hear? Do you get why knowing the difference between the stories your brain tells yo... Do you genuinely value open communication in relationship, particularly around sex and attractions?
Or, like most people, are there some things you really don’t want to hear?
Do you get why knowing the difference between the stories your brain tells you, and the sensations your body tells you, is essential for living (and loving) well?

Ian Ferguson is the no-so-behind the scenes husband and partner to renowned somatic sexologist Miss Jaiya, who created (or perhaps discoverer) of the 5 Erotic Blueprints.
I first met Ian at a sexuality symposium in Los Angeles where both Jaiya and I were speaking on stage. I have no idea if Jaiya remembered what my presentation, but I’ll never forget hers.
When she was on stage, with Ian, I watched her lie down on a massage table, and then Ian proceeded to do something with his hands, holding and waving them above her body almost as if he held a Harry Potter wand. He didn’t physically touch her at all … and within a minute Jaiya’s body started undulating and moaning upwards towards his magic wand hands, clearly riding a strong wave of orgasmic bliss. And she wasn’t faking it … and I do realize I’m a man which means what the hell do I know whether a woman is really faking it or now … but anyway that’s not the point! 
The point is, both Silvy and I have become fascinated by Jaiya and Ian’s work with the 5 Erotic Blueprints. They’ve actually helped Silvy and I bridge a few differences in the ways we both approach sex, which has helped us avoid feelings of shame or rejection and instead just create more laughter and understanding, and deeper connection.
I wanted to bring Ian on to Men, This Way, because he’s a man who lived monogamously throughout his 20s and 30s, and now lives in an open relationship with Jaiya. They have a young son, and are doing beautiful work in the world together, serving to eliminate sexual shame and celebrate self-expression, all built on the foundation of healthy boundaries and explicit consent.
Although we don’t really go into the 5 Erotic Blueprints in this episode, we do talk about Ian’s evolution in intimacy, some of the challenges of an open relationship, and some of the basic skills required for having a satisfying sexual intimacy, whether you’re monogamous or polyamorous, it’s all the same, really.   
You can actually take their Erotic Blueprint Quiz @ www.eroticbreakthrough.com/menthisway
This episode is a little longer than most, because Ian walks us through a specific, but very simple, breath practice at the very end, and we do a short meditation with this practice that I think you’ll enjoy, and be challenged by.
So definitely stay tuned for Ian’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
11:50 ~ Significant events in Ian’s early life
17:09 ~ Men’s fear of being able to pleasure their partners
23:22 ~ The power of presence in sexual encounters
26:39 ~ The benefits of real consent and respecting our partners’ boundaries
29:32 ~ Ian’s entrance into polyamorous relationships
36:41 ~ Advice for those interested in pursuing open relationships and polyamory
40:46 ~ Why the idea that “Things should just work” is bullshit
47:00 ~ What men really need to know to create a truly fulfilling, intimate relationship
50:24 ~ The dangers of alcohol in relationships and their formation
51:47 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
56:27 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
56:33 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Taking the stories you tell yourself and observe them, then start to tell the story you want to tell
57:42 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Satyen Raja (Founder of Accelerated Evolution Academy)
59:11 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie,]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:17:54
Is Monogamy (Really) Natural? w/ Robert Kandell (028) https://bryanreeves.com/monogamy-robert-kandell-028/ Sat, 06 Jul 2019 23:59:55 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47363 Are you still attracted to others when you’re in a relationship? Do you think non-monogamy might be easier, or more fulfilling, or just more … natural? Are you being honest with your partner – or yourself – about your deepest sexual desires? (and should you be?) This is an epic episode. Robert is a wise ... <a title="Is Monogamy (Really) Natural? w/ Robert Kandell (028)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/monogamy-robert-kandell-028/" aria-label="More on Is Monogamy (Really) Natural? w/ Robert Kandell (028)">Read more</a> Are you still attracted to others when you’re in a relationship? Do you think non-monogamy might be easier, or more fulfilling, or just more … natural? Are you being honest with your partner – or yourself – about your deepest sexual desires? Are you still attracted to others when you’re in a relationship?
Do you think non-monogamy might be easier, or more fulfilling, or just more … natural?
Are you being honest with your partner – or yourself – about your deepest sexual desires? (and should you be?)

This is an epic episode.
Robert is a wise man … and a dear friend of mine. 
Robert is especially wise in the domain of intimacy and relationship, because he’s been through it all.
He’s given himself to monogamy, polyamory, swinging, sex clubs, 3-somes, 4-somes, straight, bi, the whole orgy lifestyle – whatever the hell that is … and perhaps most interestingly, he was the business brains behind the ascent of One Taste, a multi-million dollar international organization, surely the world’s largest, if not the world’s ONLY, organization, that espouses the female orgasm as a gateway to humanity’s conscious awakening … yes, you heard me right … the female orgasm is a gateway to humanity’s awakening.
We’ll talk more about that, and Robert might say it or see it differently; but that was my interpretation when I first discovered One Taste, in California, of course, and both Robert and I share some fascinating stories about our experiences with One Taste, and its core practice, called “Orgasmic Meditation” – which, by the way, is a practice I recommend all couples learn about. I do NOT endorse participating in the One Taste community – and I’ll share why in this podcast – but I do recommend the practice for couples who want to create more sensual connection and intimacy. 
Anyway, Robert has immersed himself for many years in the world of sexual exploration, and there he’s met every beast living in every human shadow: jealousy, rage, insecurity, self-doubt, shame … which is one of the things I love most about being around Robert: Because of his willingness to confront these demons, he’s become a man who’s presence exudes clarity, confidence, calm, and deep, genuine caring. You really feel that he’s not hiding anything from you, and also that he doesn’t need anything from you, not even validation, and yet you still get that he cares about you.
Robert just came out with a new book, appropriately titled, Unhidden: A Book For Men And Those Confused By Them … and in his lifetime of being a badass business leader and coach, he has taught over 10,000 students in 400 workshops, coaching sessions and lectures how to live an authentic, unHIDDEN life.
In this episode, Robert and I have a spirited conversation on the question of monogamy. Is it natural? We talk about jealousy, and how it can be your best friend. We also talk about the challenges inherent in EVERY form of relationship you could possibly explore … and SO MUCH MORE!
By the way, Robert has now chosen to be in a monogamous relationship … though probably not in the way you think. But I’ll let him explain.
This is a MUST listen episode for every man, and woman, who’s ever been challenged by monogamy, or just by sexuality … which is most everyone! … 
Definitely stay tuned all the way through till Robert’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way … 
Alright … 
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
9:03 ~ Robert’s first truthful conversation
15:47 ~ The start of One Taste
24:52 ~ Jealousy can be your best friend
28:09 ~ Is monogamy natural?
34:55 ~ Modern society, marriage, divorce, and women’s rights
35:38 ~ What “You complete me” really means for men
40:07 ~ Hiding the truth about our sexuality from our partners
53:22 ~ The importance of creating a space for truth in relationships between people constantly changing
56:22 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
56:27 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Speaking the truth first to yourself,]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:05:01
Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) (027) https://bryanreeves.com/choose-her-everyday-027/ Fri, 28 Jun 2019 07:01:18 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47354 Why is intimate relationship uniquely so challenging?  Do you still think relationship should just be easy, and flow effortlessly? What does it actually look like to choose (or reject) your intimate partner everyday? In this episode, I dive into my  blog, Choose Her Everyday (or Leave Her), the blog that back in 2015 changed everything ... <a title="Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) (027)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/choose-her-everyday-027/" aria-label="More on Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her) (027)">Read more</a> Why is intimate relationship uniquely so challenging?  Do you still think relationship should just be easy, and flow effortlessly? What does it actually look like to choose (or reject) your intimate partner everyday? In this episode, Why is intimate relationship uniquely so challenging? 
Do you still think relationship should just be easy, and flow effortlessly?
What does it actually look like to choose (or reject) your intimate partner everyday?

In this episode, I dive into my  blog, Choose Her Everyday (or Leave Her), the blog that back in 2015 changed everything for me, and millions of people around the world. 
That blog has been read by 30 million plus people, and counting … in every country except North Korea, as far as I can tell … to this day, I still get messages from people who tell me that blog changed how they see intimate relationship. Relationships, families even, have been saved because of that article … relationships have also ended because of it … because either one partner finally realized they weren’t ever going to be truly chosen by their partner, or the other got deeply clear they had no intention of stepping up and actively choosing their partner … and so they discovered it was best to end the relationship altogether. 
In my work with couples – I’m both a Life Coach, and a Relationship Coach, and I work with individual men, and women, and I also work with couples, of all sexual orientations – and when I work with couples, specifically, I don’t go into the work with an agenda of trying to keep them together. I love it when a couple makes even small shifts in the way they show up, when they begin to learn the art of masculine and feminine intimacy, for example, and stop competing to be right over the facts, or details, and instead learn to connect first, no matter the disagreement over details, and suddenly their relationship takes on a more effortless flow to it they didn’t even imagine possible just a few days or weeks before. But I also don’t believe a couple should stay together if even one partner isn’t willing to really lean in and do the often uncomfortable work of self-confrontation it essentially ALWAYS requires to create a thriving relationship. 
My parents divorced when I was 4 … and as painful as it was … THANK GOD they did! In retrospect, I don’t believe that between them they had the capacity – or inclination – to really learn and grow by facing each their own unique limitations to loving, and their lack of skillful communication. Thank god they only subjected me to 4 years of relationship dysfunction and not 18 years!
I wrote Choose Her Everyday or Leave Her, 5 or 6 years after the most important relationship in my life, at least until then, ended. That relationship was emotionally intense, abusive, chaotic … a lot like how I remember my parents’ relationship in those first 4 years of my life. 
I actually write more about that heart-wrneching experience in my book, “Tell The Truth, Let The Peace Fall Where It May
 … which you can find on Amazon.
I didn’t know the effect it would have on people. The week it went viral in the summer of 2015 – which by the way, was about 3 months AFTER I actually wrote and published it – I felt like I owned Facebook. It was everywhere. It even played a fascinating role in bringing Lady Silvy to me, whom I met the same week it went viral. But that story for another time.
In this episode, I revisit this epic blog that still seems to sing a resonant chord in the heart of humanity.
Definitely stay tuned for my 3 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way … 
Alright … 
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
yes 43:09
A Man Divided Causes Stress in His Partner (026) https://bryanreeves.com/man-divided-causes-stress-026/ Wed, 19 Jun 2019 12:00:43 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47316 Have you ever felt divided about being in a relationship? Does your partner seem to feel divided about … you, or your relationship? Would you choose to succeed at your mission, your career, your purpose in life … over succeeding in relationship? In this episode, I dive into one of my recent popular blogs, A ... <a title="A Man Divided Causes Stress in His Partner (026)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/man-divided-causes-stress-026/" aria-label="More on A Man Divided Causes Stress in His Partner (026)">Read more</a> Have you ever felt divided about being in a relationship? Does your partner seem to feel divided about … you, or your relationship? Would you choose to succeed at your mission, your career, your purpose in life … over succeeding in relationship? Have you ever felt divided about being in a relationship?
Does your partner seem to feel divided about … you, or your relationship?
Would you choose to succeed at your mission, your career, your purpose in life … over succeeding in relationship?

In this episode, I dive into one of my recent popular blogs,
A Man Divided Causes Stress In His Partner for useful insights to make a meaningful difference in your life.
You’ll have more clarity about the essential importance of deeply committing to whatever you are actually choosing in your life, whether that’s your work in the world, or a relationship.
I aim to help you understand that you can always change your mind or make different choices tomorrow, or in 5 years, but if you are living today in the awkward “in-between” – resistant to fully making a choice one way or another, particularly in intimacy, but also in your work, is going to create tension, confusion, and ultimately suffering, for you and the ones affected by your choosing, and particularly your lack of choosing.
Definitely stay tuned for my 3 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
]]> Bryan Reeves yes 27:01 Bridging (Painful) Cultural Divides w/ Tarek Mounib #FreeTripToEgypt (025) https://bryanreeves.com/bridging-cultural-divides-tarek-mounib-egypt-026/ Fri, 14 Jun 2019 18:59:17 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47277 Are you concerned (frightened, pissed) about the state of the world politic today? Have you given up hope that we can all just get along? Have you been to Egypt, or thought about going … or wouldn’t now dare go now?! In this episode, my guest is Tarak Mounib, whose courageous new film, Free Trip ... <a title="Bridging (Painful) Cultural Divides w/ Tarek Mounib #FreeTripToEgypt (025)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/bridging-cultural-divides-tarek-mounib-egypt-026/" aria-label="More on Bridging (Painful) Cultural Divides w/ Tarek Mounib #FreeTripToEgypt (025)">Read more</a> Are you concerned (frightened, pissed) about the state of the world politic today? Have you given up hope that we can all just get along? Have you been to Egypt, or thought about going … or wouldn’t now dare go now?! In this episode, Are you concerned (frightened, pissed) about the state of the world politic today?
Have you given up hope that we can all just get along?
Have you been to Egypt, or thought about going … or wouldn’t now dare go now?!

In this episode, my guest is Tarak Mounib, whose courageous new film, Free Trip To Egypt, has just come out and is playing in movie theaters across the country this month.
Before we dive in with Tarak, I want to tell you something about me you don’t know: I have an adopted Egyptian brother.
He lives in Nashville with my dad and step-mom. I met him 20 years ago, when I was fresh out of the military and traveling around the world desperately trying to find myself …. Well, one of the many places I found myself was in the heart of Cairo, where I lived with Wael’s family (his name is Wael) for 3 months. In the summer just before 9/11 … what i experienced changed my life forever.
I had never before experienced such a culture of hospitality and welcoming. Yes, there were things that bothered me about the experience in Egypt, that felt oppressive like the military, but more than that, I was left with an indelible imprint on my soul of the profound capacity Egyptians have to be kind, loyal friends and companions, to be concerned and present, and to be loving. When 9/11 happened a few months later – and I was 3 miles from the Pentagon when it was hit, attending a 9am talk in downtown Washington D.C. by president Bill Clinton’s Middle East Envoy, Ambassador Dennis Ross, about the state of peace talks in the Middle East – well I was devastated.
Yes because of the attacks themselves – and even more so because suddenly a hatred so nasty and violent began to emerge even from a few people close to me, towards the very Muslims I had fallen in love with, and who had fully embraced me as their own son, just months earlier.
So when my friend John Raatz, founder of the Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment  (known as GATE) told me he was taking on marketing and promotion for a movie about bringing people from places in America where that same hatred and vitriol towards Muslims has been erupting these last few years TO Egypt … to live with Egyptian families, to essentially be swallowed up by the same love and welcoming I experienced 20 years ago … I was over the moon!
John allowed me to do a private screening in my home for some friends before it was released, and well … here we are today. By the time you hear this podcast, Tarak’s film will have been shown in over 500 theaters across North America.
This is my conversation with Tarak, a profound exploration into culture, the shared human experience, and the hope, and wisdom, and futility in learning how to bridge the sometimes excruciating differences that divide people everywhere, and how getting along doesn’t require … CAN’T require … MUST NOT require … that we all think the same.
Definitely stay tuned for Tarak’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:22 ~ The launch and reception of Tarek’s film “Free Trip To Egypt”
8:46 ~ A significant early experience in Tarek’s life
12:24 ~ Relationship with father
13:04 ~ Relationship with Egypt
17:36 ~ Similarities between Egypt and the west
23:48 ~ Why Tarek made his film at this time
27:40 ~ What Egypt can teach the west
32:31 ~ “Free Trip To Egypt”
36:55 ~ Aspects of living under an authoritative government
47:34 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
50:14 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
50:37 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Trust hope
52:09 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: The Dalai Lama
53:04 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Tarek’s film “Free Trip To Egypt”
53:31 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 59:16
Reclaiming Your (Primal) Masculinity w/ Eivind Skjellum (024) https://bryanreeves.com/reclaiming-primal-masculinity-eivind-skjellum-024/ Wed, 05 Jun 2019 22:49:16 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47263 Do you feel disconnected from your father, grandfather(s) … from Life? Do you feel disconnected from your wild nature? Do you yearn for a deeper connection … to yourself? I really enjoyed this conversation with Eivind Figenschau Skjellum of Norway. His company, Reclaim Your Inner Throne, a rich expression of men’s work that, among other ... <a title="Reclaiming Your (Primal) Masculinity w/ Eivind Skjellum (024)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/reclaiming-primal-masculinity-eivind-skjellum-024/" aria-label="More on Reclaiming Your (Primal) Masculinity w/ Eivind Skjellum (024)">Read more</a> Do you feel disconnected from your father, grandfather(s) … from Life? Do you feel disconnected from your wild nature? Do you yearn for a deeper connection … to yourself? I really enjoyed this conversation with Eivind Figenschau Skjellum of Norway. Do you feel disconnected from your father, grandfather(s) … from Life?
Do you feel disconnected from your wild nature?
Do you yearn for a deeper connection … to yourself?

I really enjoyed this conversation with Eivind Figenschau Skjellum of Norway.
His company, Reclaim Your Inner Throne, a rich expression of men’s work that, among other essential insights and practices, helps men reconnect … or even just connect for the first time for so many men, with the Mature Masculine archetypes – KING WARRIOR MAGICIAN LOVER … archetypes founded on Carl Jung’s work and outlined beautifully in the timeless classic of that same name – K W M L – by Robert Moore and Douglass Gilette. The theory goes, that these archetypes are embedded in the DNA of all men, but like a software code not yet given the command to begin running the program, many men in the modern world live perpetually stuck in predominantly adolescent psychological structures, those archetypes locked away in a latent state beyond our grasping, largely due to a lack of thoughtful male elders who can initiate us into manhood, and also an abundance of distractions that appeal to the adolescent self-concerned mind. Because of this, we men risk living deeply unfulfilled, while women risk everything that comes with living in a world with few truly mature men.
Reading that book many years actually changed my life – which I share a little bit about how it did that in this episode.
One of the things I think I love most about Eivind, actually … is he’s from Norway, the historic land of the Viking. I’m obsessed with Viking culture and mythology.
In fact, he’s hosting an upcoming small men’s retreat called “Kings of the North” … in the wilds of Norway this summer, and I’m going. I’m actually leading one of the tribal clans in the retreat, and so if you’d like to attend a men’s retreat in Norway, and be a member of my 5-man clan – everyone gets a Viking Helmet and Battle Axe – go to bryanreeves.com/norway for more information … bryanreeves.com/norway.
Definitely stay tuned for Eivind’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:34 ~ Vikings and primal nature
11:03 ~ Retreats and the benefits of being alone in nature
17:58 ~ Ash initiation ritual
20:08 ~ Eivind’s experience with illness
28:15 ~ Warriors serving kings, and other archetypes
30:49 ~ The Oedipal child and the dark side of the mother archetype
47:02 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
49:40 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
49:53 ~ KEY INSIGHT: “Whatever qualities of being that you exile from your own inner kingdom, will show up in the outer kingdom as the faces of evil”
52:49 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Robert L. Moore – Psychologist, and co-author alongside Douglas Gillette of “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine”
54:04 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Tom Bilyeu’s “Impact Theory” (Online Interview Series)
56:26 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): A Spanish acoustic guitar
58:34 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Cut off technology at the beginning and the end of each day
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Eivind @ www.Inner-Throne.com
As well as www.InnerThroneAcademy.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:03:19
Why Men Use Sex (Porn) to Avoid Pain w/ Mark Groves (023) https://bryanreeves.com/why-men-sex-avoid-pain-mark-groves-023/ Wed, 29 May 2019 17:57:09 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47243 Are you leaking sexual energy all over the place, at the store, gym, work, online? Could you be using sex or porn to avoid shame, or avoid intimacy, or live up to some outdated model of a man? Could you be using orgasm to self-soothe because you rarely received emotional soothing as a child? Mark Groves ... <a title="Why Men Use Sex (Porn) to Avoid Pain w/ Mark Groves (023)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/why-men-sex-avoid-pain-mark-groves-023/" aria-label="More on Why Men Use Sex (Porn) to Avoid Pain w/ Mark Groves (023)">Read more</a> Are you leaking sexual energy all over the place, at the store, gym, work, online? Could you be using sex or porn to avoid shame, or avoid intimacy, or live up to some outdated model of a man? Could you be using orgasm to self-soothe because you rarely... Are you leaking sexual energy all over the place, at the store, gym, work, online?
Could you be using sex or porn to avoid shame, or avoid intimacy, or live up to some outdated model of a man?
Could you be using orgasm to self-soothe because you rarely received emotional soothing as a child?

Mark Groves is the founder of the popular and inspiring instagram page, Create The Love.
This is a little different than most episodes of Men, This Way, in that Mark is a repeat guest and we’re drilling down into a specific topic – essentially, how men use sex to avoid pain and what to do about it.
It’s a subject both Mark and I have a LOT of personal, painful experience in. We both used women, used sex, used porn, used orgasm to avoid a lot of underlying issues that just perpetuated disconnect and suffering in both ourselves and in our partners, even despite all the pleasure and good feeling that sex and orgasm and intimacy absolutely offer, too.
Since we both have also been on profoundly healing journeys around all this, awakening to and practicing what it takes to create healthy relationships, not just with another person, but with ourselves, and with our own full, rich sexual drives and desires, too, we decided to record an episode on this for you.
It’s filled with the life-changing insights and practices we both discovered on our respective journeys, including my experience doing a 30-day sex, dating, flirting, hunting, and hoping diet a few years ago, which profoundly shifted my relationship to sex, and intimacy, and really paved the way for the exquisite relationship I’m in today.
Definitely listen to the end of this episode of “Men, This Way,” where we give you our best practices for learning how to use sex, not as a crutch to avoid pain, but rather as potent fuel for creating more vitality and deep connection in your life.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:58 ~ Mark Groves’ experiences with sex and emotional pain
12:08 ~ Seeking sex for emotional comfort
14:54 ~ Sex as validation
25:36 ~ Porn and its effects on men today
34:40 ~ Managing our sexual energy, and what draws from it
47:28 ~ Performance and validation
52:09 ~ The danger of making orgasm the point of sex
56:39 ~ Shame and sexuality
1:03:31 ~ Going on a sex diet
1:09:57 ~ Facing our pain, rather than avoiding it
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Mark @ www.MarkGroves.tv
The Mark Groves Podcast
@CreateTheLove on Instagram
Also … Do your own “Sex, Dating, Flirting, Hunting & Hoping Diet” @ www.BryanReeves.com/DatingDiet
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:15:52
Comparison is the Thief of Joy w/ Quddus Phillippe (022) https://bryanreeves.com/comparison-thief-of-joy-quddus-022/ Wed, 22 May 2019 20:03:11 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47213 Are you still pursuing success, recognition, or just more likes on your posts ‘cause you think it’ll make you happy? Do you compare your success to others … and come up short? Do you hide your vulnerability and authenticity – or overuse it? – to sell yourself (your brand)? “If Oprah and Ryan Seacrest had ... <a title="Comparison is the Thief of Joy w/ Quddus Phillippe (022)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/comparison-thief-of-joy-quddus-022/" aria-label="More on Comparison is the Thief of Joy w/ Quddus Phillippe (022)">Read more</a> Are you still pursuing success, recognition, or just more likes on your posts ‘cause you think it’ll make you happy? Do you compare your success to others … and come up short? Do you hide your vulnerability and authenticity – or overuse it? Are you still pursuing success, recognition, or just more likes on your posts ‘cause you think it’ll make you happy?
Do you compare your success to others … and come up short?
Do you hide your vulnerability and authenticity – or overuse it? – to sell yourself (your brand)?

“If Oprah and Ryan Seacrest had a love child, the kid would end up being like Quddus.”
~ Chris Rock
Quddus first burst onto the world platform as host of MTV’s biggest show, Total Request Live from 2001 to 2006. He’s since interviewed and connected with and worked with the biggest stars and celebrities on the planet: Will Smith, Beyoncé, Jay-Z, Ben Affleck, Denzel Washington, Usher Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and pretty much anyone else you might think of.
But that’s not why I invited him on Men, This Way. I invited him on, because since fate craftily brought our paths together – not once, but twice, in completely serendipitous moments – I’ve come to know Quddus as a deeply inspired and inspiring man in his own right, and as a friend.
He’s also a fascinating study in energy. Because he is one of the most visibly luminous and energetic people I’ve ever met! I first met him at the END of a 4-day transformational workshop where I had been partnered up as a workshop buddy with a recent ex-girlfriend of his, this gorgeous Romanian actress/model I would naturally have an ill-fated crush on for the ensuing few months after that workshop … when Quddus came on the last evening – all friends and family were invited to attend the last evening of this particular workshop – I only remember his bright smile and outrageous charisma and a massive energy that just lit up the room such that I felt like that tiny little blue dot we call Pluto suddenly placed in proximity to our exploding Sun!
But I didn’t get to know him that night. That happened a few years later, when I overheard him deftly navigating an uncomfortable phone conversation in the lobby at the posh and exclusive SoHo house in Hollywood, where I was teaching a relationship workshop.
Quddus attended my workshop that day, and soon after he invited me to attend a workshop of his own.
His newest project is “The Creator Incubator“, an 8-week accelerator to help you launch your dream project.
One last thing, Quddus and I recorded an earlier interview which quickly turned into more of a coaching session as he was going through a tough moment. We decided not to share that, but we do refer to it here, and I tell you that so you’re not confused.
Definitely stay tuned for Quddus’ 5 key takeaways at the end of this episode of Men, This Way.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
7:31 ~ Quddus’ proximity to fame
13:19 ~ Quddus’ recent experience of India
14:40 ~ Hollywood and happiness
19:08 ~ Comparison, success, and joy
23:22 ~ Camera ready
27:12 ~ Being vulnerable versus using vulnerability
29:41 ~ Content for the bottom line versus the world
34:47 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
36:16 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
36:20 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Before any lofty goals of changing the world, let’s start with our own backyard
38:02 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM:
Daniel DiPiazza
Mahatma Gandhi
39:54 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “Shoe Dog: A Memoir by the Creator of NIKE” (Book) by Phil Knight
]]>
Bryan Reeves 46:05
Are You Living True Path … or False Path? w/ Jeff Brown (021) https://bryanreeves.com/true-path-false-path-jeff-brown-021/ Wed, 15 May 2019 18:40:27 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47201 Are you living just to survive … or to fulfill your soul’s purpose? What’s the cost of not living your soul’s purpose? How can you even know if you’re living your soul’s path? How do you navigate the need to pay the bills (or show up for your loved ones) … AND the drive to ... <a title="Are You Living True Path … or False Path? w/ Jeff Brown (021)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/true-path-false-path-jeff-brown-021/" aria-label="More on Are You Living True Path … or False Path? w/ Jeff Brown (021)">Read more</a> Are you living just to survive … or to fulfill your soul’s purpose? What’s the cost of not living your soul’s purpose? How can you even know if you’re living your soul’s path? How do you navigate the need to pay the bills (or show up for your loved one... Are you living just to survive … or to fulfill your soul’s purpose?
What’s the cost of not living your soul’s purpose?
How can you even know if you’re living your soul’s path?
How do you navigate the need to pay the bills (or show up for your loved ones) … AND the drive to live your soul’s calling today?

I was so excited for this conversation with Jeff Brown.
My lady has been a long time fan of his work – she often shares his wisdom on her Instagram page. I didn’t realize it until I started doing more research on Jeff, but I actually saw a documentary he produced called Karmageddon, years ago … a deeply insightful documentary about his fascinating (and disturbing) experience hosting in his home an essentially narcissistic boundary-violating musical guru who had a particular affinity for teenage women. This was well before the #METOO movement, and I wonder how that so-called guru-teacher is being received these days.
Anyway, what I so love about Jeff’s work and his writing, which I first witnessed in him in his documentary, is he brings firmly grounded perspective to the often lofty and disembodied heights of modern spirituality … where so many modern spiritual-teachers even coaches are using spiritual ideas and concepts, such as non-identification with form, and detachment from suffering, as grounds for actually abusing people and causing people to dishonor their own critical human boundaries, Jeff seizes on that insanity to bring spirituality back to earth, into the body, so that spiritual practice serves to deepen, and enrich, our human experience, not merely bypass it.
Jeff is the author of 6 books, including his most recent release, “Grounded Spirituality” … the book I decided to read to really prepare for this conversation was “Soulshaping: A Journey of Self-Creation” … which is an autobiographical account of his journey to awakening to his soul’s calling … and of course all the forces arrayed against him – both the inner forces like self-doubt and survival thinking – and also the outer forces our world makes real, like the very real need to make money and the persistent reality that one’s soul calling is often at odds with the modern world’s monetary system. In other words, despite all the Hallmark spirituality out there and the countless social media influencers who caption their luxury resort photos with trite assurances that if you just leap, you’ll grow wings … the truth is that even in today’s world of seemingly endless possibilities, following your soul’s calling often WON’T be financially rewarding … at least not for a very uncomfortable amount of time!
And I LOVE that Jeff leans straight into such widely perpetuated inspirational cliches that sing in sometimes painful dissonance with everyday reality.
Jeff’s book quickly became one of my all-time favorites – even just today I gave it to a client going through a massive life transition.
And Jeff the man is now one of my favorite men. Although we’ve just met, based on what I’ve witnessed through his work, and now through our conversation that you’re about to hear, I already know I deeply trust this man, in his integrity to just be real with me.
Definitely stay tuned for Jeff’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:16 ~ Jeff’s latest book “Grounded Spirituality”
10:10 ~ False path and true path
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:00:54
The Courage It Takes to Live Your Truth w/ Kute Blackson (020) https://bryanreeves.com/courage-live-your-truth-kute-blackson-020/ Wed, 08 May 2019 22:39:27 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47160 Are you (still) afraid of the consequences of fully living your truth? Are you (still) living in your father’s shadow? Are you aware your partner can’t trust you when you don’t own your truth (even if your truth is inconvenient to them)? Kute Blackson is a lightning rod for truth and inspiration. Kute grew up ... <a title="The Courage It Takes to Live Your Truth w/ Kute Blackson (020)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/courage-live-your-truth-kute-blackson-020/" aria-label="More on The Courage It Takes to Live Your Truth w/ Kute Blackson (020)">Read more</a> Are you (still) afraid of the consequences of fully living your truth? Are you (still) living in your father’s shadow? Are you aware your partner can’t trust you when you don’t own your truth (even if your truth is inconvenient to them)? Are you (still) afraid of the consequences of fully living your truth?
Are you (still) living in your father’s shadow?
Are you aware your partner can’t trust you when you don’t own your truth (even if your truth is inconvenient to them)?

Kute Blackson is a lightning rod for truth and inspiration.
Kute grew up the son of an African Ghanian preacher whose religious empire encompassed over 300 churches across Ghana, and he shares in this episode the impact of that experience on him as a Man, and particularly what happened when he finally denied his father’s demand for him to take over that empire.
I first met Kute about 8 years ago at a Yoga Festival in Santa Monica, the beach paradise of Los Angeles, and had the great pleasure to get to know this inspired man over the next few years. In the most interesting settings … He would show up in a gorgeous black lamborghini from nowhere at a little dinner party at a mutual friend’s misty mountain home, or invite me to a private party at his modern-style home in Silver Lake, in east Los Angeles, where I’d arrive by my lonesome only to be immediately embraced by a diverse group of 50-ish people I’d never met before dancing blissfully in his spacious living room to uplifting pop-tunes. I remember twice he hosted these massive club events, which he called “LoveStock” … right in the heart of shallow, disconnected Hollywood, they were these utterly uplifting all day parties filled with bands and performance artists and massage therapists givnig out free massages all day and inspired food vendors selling nourishing food … and Kute would jump up on stage at times and lead a thousand attendees in these raucous musical crescendoes of joy as we danced our hearts open … I know, sounds very California …
But Kute is full of surprises …
For he’s also the author of the national bestselling book You.Are.The.One. and has been featured on Larry King Now, Fox and Friends, Dr. Drew … Inc magazine calls him ‘The Mindfulness Guru Billionaires Go To For Advice’.
Kute is not just my friend and a man I admire, he is a charismatic visionary and transformational teacher offering a fresh, bold look at spiritual awareness for the modern world.
Kute is truly an electric presence, and I’m excited for this episode today.
Definitely stay tuned for Kute’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end – he absolutely SLAYS the Key Insight Takeaway … that one alone can change your everyday life – so stick around for that at the end of this episode of Men, This Way.
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:52 ~ Traveling, service, achievements, and surrender
12:26 ~ A significant event in Kute’s early life that played a fundamental role in shaping him
22:44 ~ Being true to yourself
25:12 ~ Speaking truth in relationships
32:56 ~ What women often get wrong about men
36:40 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
45:55 ~ “KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
46:42 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Embrace your death. Realize nobody owes you anything
52:24 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Regular vitamin IV treatments
53:50 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Moment-to-moment surrender
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Kute @ www.KuteBlackson.com
InstaGram: @kuteblackson
Twitter: @kuteblackson
Facebook: www.facebook.com/KuteBlacksonLoveNow
As well as his Boundless Bliss event @ www.BoundlessBlissBali.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:02:46
Why My Girlfriend Was Always Angry With Me (019) https://bryanreeves.com/why-girlfriend-always-angry-019/ Wed, 01 May 2019 20:43:25 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47137 Have you ever had an intimate partner be routinely upset (with you), and you (mostly) had no clue why? How do your triggers from previous relationships show up in a new relationship, too? How can your childhood experience – even if you had great parents – still negatively affect your adult relationships? This episode of ... <a title="Why My Girlfriend Was Always Angry With Me (019)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/why-girlfriend-always-angry-019/" aria-label="More on Why My Girlfriend Was Always Angry With Me (019)">Read more</a> Have you ever had an intimate partner be routinely upset (with you), and you (mostly) had no clue why? How do your triggers from previous relationships show up in a new relationship, too? How can your childhood experience – even if you had great parent... Have you ever had an intimate partner be routinely upset (with you), and you (mostly) had no clue why?
How do your triggers from previous relationships show up in a new relationship, too?
How can your childhood experience – even if you had great parents – still negatively affect your adult relationships?

This episode of Men, This Way is a rebroadcast of one of my favorite ever interviews, which I recently did on another podcast … the Mark Groves podcast, hosted by my old friend, Mark Groves of the popular page, CreateTheLove on Instagram … and we dive into an essential topic.
I’ve gotten so much inspired feedback on this interview from both men and women … one woman even wrote to tell me this episode was so deeply comforting and healing for her that she’s listened to it 2-3x each day for a week, even falling asleep to it at night!
Plus … I love Mark Groves. He’s just a good dude, and he’s funny, and he held a great space for this conversation to unfold. His podcast, The Mark Groves Podcast, is super cool, too, and you should check it out on your favorite podcast app.
Mark’s Highlights of this Episode
Bryan Reeves is our guest this week and I am so excited to introduce you to a man who has truly lived a life of adventure and exploration. Bryan and I discuss his journey, from hyper-masculine army careerist, to wandering the Earth, and later to being a relationship and life coach.
Bryan talks us through the journey that broke his heart, opened his heart and totally renewed his joy for life.
Bryan and Mark go DEEP on all things masculinity this week.

* Why did Bryan’s girlfriends always end up frustrated and angry with him?
* Why do men follow Instagram models and damage their relationships with online behaviour?
* How can childhood emotional neglect – even the most subtle forms – play out in our adult lives?
* And what about our triggers, how can triggers from previous relationships or previous lives continue to impact our current partners.

Mark and Bryan discuss the challenges that every couple is bound to face.
Episode highlights (times not exact):
6:00 – The journey from army career to relationship coach.
9:30 – Finding the subject that ‘lit’ me up
10:30 – Why are the women I am in relationship with always angry at me?
15:00 – Instagram and the online world affecting relationships.
22:00 – Childhood emotional neglect – how can the most subtle forms affect our adult life?
28:00 – What triggers us in our parents, what does this reflect in us?
49:00 – Therapy, coaches and relationships, the value of working with someone from outside of our relationship.
51:00 – Triggers from past, childhood and their influence in current situations.
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:00:26
How to Stop Feeling Burdened By Life (018) https://bryanreeves.com/how-to-stop-feeling-burdened-by-life-018/ Thu, 25 Apr 2019 00:48:05 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47113 Do you ever (often) feel trapped, or burdened by life – your work, relationship, kids, parents, your bank account, your body, or just your circumstances, in general? Do you often experience resistance to the life you’re right now living? (or just what’s happening at the moment … like you just want it to go away!) ... <a title="How to Stop Feeling Burdened By Life (018)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/how-to-stop-feeling-burdened-by-life-018/" aria-label="More on How to Stop Feeling Burdened By Life (018)">Read more</a> Do you ever (often) feel trapped, or burdened by life – your work, relationship, kids, parents, your bank account, your body, or just your circumstances, in general? Do you often experience resistance to the life you’re right now living? Do you ever (often) feel trapped, or burdened by life – your work, relationship, kids, parents, your bank account, your body, or just your circumstances, in general?
Do you often experience resistance to the life you’re right now living? (or just what’s happening at the moment … like you just want it to go away!)
Do you avoid feelings of frustration, sadness, anger, loneliness, despair?

Key Takeaways

We are ALWAYS going to feel trapped and burdened by something!
Avoiding the feelings never works. Especially when it comes to intimacy … AND to enjoying our lives.
Everything has come to teach us a lesson (“nothing happens TO us only FOR us.”)

PRACTICE: Emotion / Anger Yoga
RESOURCES
Michael Singer’s Book, The Surrender Experiment
 
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 44:07
Apologizing For Our Masculinity is Not What Makes Women (Or Anyone) Feel Safe w/ Mark Grainger (017) https://bryanreeves.com/apologizing-masculinity-not-feel-safe-mark-grainger-017/ Wed, 17 Apr 2019 18:27:20 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47099 Are you a man disconnected from your power? How can you be your full, wildly masculine self without apology (and without hurting anyone)? Are you committed to going all in on your dreams … or are you half-assing it? Mark Grainger is actually one of my coaches (yes, I have multiple!). A few years ago, ... <a title="Apologizing For Our Masculinity is Not What Makes Women (Or Anyone) Feel Safe w/ Mark Grainger (017)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/apologizing-masculinity-not-feel-safe-mark-grainger-017/" aria-label="More on Apologizing For Our Masculinity is Not What Makes Women (Or Anyone) Feel Safe w/ Mark Grainger (017)">Read more</a> Are you a man disconnected from your power? How can you be your full, wildly masculine self without apology (and without hurting anyone)? Are you committed to going all in on your dreams … or are you half-assing it? Are you a man disconnected from your power?
How can you be your full, wildly masculine self without apology (and without hurting anyone)?
Are you committed to going all in on your dreams … or are you half-assing it?

Mark Grainger is actually one of my coaches (yes, I have multiple!).
A few years ago, I went to an event Mark and his wife, Shannon, were hosting in the San Francisco Bay area to teach entrepreneurs how to speak powerfully on stage in ways that actually create more income.
About 30 minutes into this 3-day event, Mark told all us men to stand up and grab our balls. Which we did, with a certain giddy discomfort I would say. Mark then led us through a pledge – I don’t remember the exact details – but essentially a pledge to fully own our desires, to not apologize for being men, and to ALSO be chivalrous and attuned to the women in the room. I loved it. The women loved it, too, except for one, who didn’t love it at all, which we talk about in this episode.
That weekend, I decided to become a VIP coaching client of Mark and Shannon’s, and I paid them $20,000 to start coaching me in my business. In many ways thanks to their influence, I feel like I now actually have a business, whereas before all I had were ways to make money.
Mark’s background is in marketing and sales. A genius branding expert, he’s executed over 450 branding and promotional campaigns as the advisor to Porsche, Harley Davidson, AFLAC,  Marriott, and more.

Today, he’s helping heart-centered entrepreneurs who are committed to making a meaningful difference in the world create bigger impacts with their message.
I invited Mark onto the podcast to learn more about his journey as a man, what challenges he’s faced on his entrepreneurial journey, and in his relationship with Shannon, with whom he’s built a multi-million-dollar business.
Our conversation covered a wide range of essential topics, from the challenges many men face being raised by well-meaning moms who are angry at men, to where are we men supposed to put our power in today’s world?
Definitely stay tuned all the way through to his 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way
Alright …
Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:42 ~ Significant event in Mark’s early life that played a fundamental role in shaping him
13:44 ~ How our wounds get in the way of communicating effectively
16:12 ~ Working with your partner
20:27 ~ “Can the person who loves me do the talking”
23:21 ~ You’re not angry for the reasons you think you are
25:55 ~ “Men stand up and grab your balls”
37:49 ~ Mark’s journey as an entrepreneur
40:32 ~ Acting despite being terrified
43:21 ~ Disempowering thoughts and beliefs
47:23 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
51:26 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
51:43 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Do the work
53:48 ~ KEY MENTOR: Bill Gould & Marianne Williamson
56:18 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “Stealing Fire: How Silicon Valley, the Navy SEALs, and Maverick Scientists Are Revolutionizing the Way We Live and Work” by Jamie Wheal and Steven Kotler (Book)
58:07 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Miss Jaiya’s Erotic Blueprints
1:00:06 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Breath of Fire (Kundalini yoga practice)
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Mark @ www.MyBigImpact.com
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Bryan Reeves yes 1:04:23
How Men Can Overcome Resistance to Getting Support (and Why We Must!) w/ Connor Beaton (016) https://bryanreeves.com/how-men-can-overcome-resistance-to-getting-support-and-why-we-must-with-connor-beaton/ Wed, 10 Apr 2019 08:29:11 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47086 Why do men often seem to resist support (therapy/coaching/asking for directions)? Why is getting support essential for a great life and great relationships? What can help a man overcome his resistance to getting support? In this episode, my guest Connor Beaton and I dive into this conversation about men and support … why we need ... <a title="How Men Can Overcome Resistance to Getting Support (and Why We Must!) w/ Connor Beaton (016)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/how-men-can-overcome-resistance-to-getting-support-and-why-we-must-with-connor-beaton/" aria-label="More on How Men Can Overcome Resistance to Getting Support (and Why We Must!) w/ Connor Beaton (016)">Read more</a> Why do men often seem to resist support (therapy/coaching/asking for directions)? Why is getting support essential for a great life and great relationships? What can help a man overcome his resistance to getting support? In this episode, Why do men often seem to resist support (therapy/coaching/asking for directions)?
Why is getting support essential for a great life and great relationships?
What can help a man overcome his resistance to getting support?

In this episode, my guest Connor Beaton and I dive into this conversation about men and support … why we need it, why we resist, and what can get us over that resistance to taking action.
Connor is is the founder of Mantalks, an international organization dedicated to helping the lives of men. Connor is also my first repeat guest on “Men, This Way” and in this special focus episode, though we drill down into one specific topic, we cover a lot of ground.
If you are in a relationship I strongly recommend listening to this episode with your partner, because it has the potential to bridge painful gaps between you.
If you’re not in a relationship, this is the perfect time to listen to this, because waiting until things are really shitty before gaining the clarity that you’re actually NOT supposed to figure out how to do life and love well, all by yourself … is no way to go through life and do love!
In fact, doing it all by yourself is the best way to end up alone! Even if you’re surrounded by people … This is an essential episode that I trust will serve you deeply, today and beyond.
If you want to share feedback, or tell me what this conversation inspired in you, you can now email me directly at bryan at bryanreeves dot com … I’d love to hear your thoughts …
Alright …
let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:48 ~ Why getting support matters, and why men need to get it
13:56 ~ Success and loneliness
21:04 ~ The shadow masculine and being alone
24:09 ~ Experience of hardship as a pre-requisite for belief
31:18 ~ The masculine drive towards freedom through structure and order
33:58 ~ Overcoming the resistance to seeking support
36:57 ~ How to approach getting a man to get support
40:38 ~ The importance of respect in relationships
44:42 ~ Feedback versus criticism
49:16 ~ Masculinity’s orientation towards growth
55:29 ~ Disposability and its effect on men’s self-esteem
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Connor @ www.ManTalks.com
And @ManTalks (Instagram)
As well as www.ConnorBeaton.com
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Bryan Reeves yes 1:03:31
Why You Suck at Intimacy (and How To Do It Better) w/ Zat Baraka (015) https://bryanreeves.com/better-intimacy-zat-baraka-015/ Wed, 03 Apr 2019 19:32:36 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47054 Do you struggle to be genuinely vulnerable? Did you know intimacy with self is required for true intimacy with others? What’s the connection between self-awareness and life (love) mastery? Zat Baraka is a dear friend of mine. I first met him about 9 years ago in Los Angeles before he was a renowned men’s coach. ... <a title="Why You Suck at Intimacy (and How To Do It Better) w/ Zat Baraka (015)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/better-intimacy-zat-baraka-015/" aria-label="More on Why You Suck at Intimacy (and How To Do It Better) w/ Zat Baraka (015)">Read more</a> Do you struggle to be genuinely vulnerable? Did you know intimacy with self is required for true intimacy with others? What’s the connection between self-awareness and life (love) mastery? Zat Baraka is a dear friend of mine. Do you struggle to be genuinely vulnerable?
Did you know intimacy with self is required for true intimacy with others?
What’s the connection between self-awareness and life (love) mastery?

Zat Baraka is a dear friend of mine.
I first met him about 9 years ago in Los Angeles before he was a renowned men’s coach. It’s been fascinating to see behind the scenes of his journey from being a man already engaged in a decades-long Buddhist spiritual practice, to a renowned teacher and coach helping men, in particular, get out of our heads and live more fully connected to our own bodies, our emotions, so that we may live more connected to other men, to our friends and families, to our partners … to our lives.
In fact, that’s what I most admire and appreciate about Zat, and our friendship, is that no matter what’s coming up between us – and we’ve had a few pretty intense moments of disagreement where I’ll be so bold as to say less wise men would have either killed each other or simply never spoken again – but no matter what it is, we’re always able to own our own emotions, our own stories, or we often say, our own shit, before trying to resolve the details of the conflict … and that mutual capacity has allowed our friendship, our respect and love for each other to consistently deepen.
Zat models this practice beautifully, which in my experience, is essential for ANY relationship – intimate or otherwise – to truly thrive.
In this episode, Zat and I explore what it really means to know yourself, in tangible, practical ways that actually make life – and love – better in most every way.
Definitely stay tuned Zat’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:06 ~ The reason for being honest about how we are feeling
9:40 ~ Wisdom from parenting
14:03 ~ A significant early experience that played a fundamental role in shaping Zat as a man
17:45 ~ How early experiences shaped Zat’s challenges
22:06 ~ Why taking radical responsibility or ownership matters
26:22 ~ The best part about working with men
36:54 ~ The most challenging aspect of working with men
40:05 ~ The biggest challenge for men in intimate relationships
42:39 ~ The biggest challenge facing men today
45:46 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
45:50 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Embrace your shadow
47:32 ~ KEY MENTOR: Pema Khandro Rinpoche. Tibetan Buddhist teacher, scholar and humanitarian. David Deida. Groundbreaking work in relationships
48:49 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “To Be A Man: A Guide to True Masculine Power” by Robert Augustus Masters (Book)
49:23 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Going on retreat with a teacher
51:04 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Breathing practice, especially Zat’s Tantric Breathwork Meditation: Available at www.ZatBaraka.com/Mens-Toolbox – use complimentary code “bryan”
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Zat @ www.ZatBaraka.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 56:51
Your Loyalty To Truth Can Hurt You w/ Jesse Elder (014) https://bryanreeves.com/loyalty-truth-hurt-jesse-elder-014/ Wed, 27 Mar 2019 16:50:08 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47040 Do you get angry over small things? Can you instantly change your thoughts to be more empowered? Does loyalty to some idealogy or “truth” get in the way of what’s actually useful for your life? Jesse Elder is a fascinating man. His inspired, and improvised, mind-vitamin wisdom videos have been viewed by over 60 million ... <a title="Your Loyalty To Truth Can Hurt You w/ Jesse Elder (014)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/loyalty-truth-hurt-jesse-elder-014/" aria-label="More on Your Loyalty To Truth Can Hurt You w/ Jesse Elder (014)">Read more</a> Do you get angry over small things? Can you instantly change your thoughts to be more empowered? Does loyalty to some idealogy or “truth” get in the way of what’s actually useful for your life? Jesse Elder is a fascinating man. His inspired, Do you get angry over small things?
Can you instantly change your thoughts to be more empowered?
Does loyalty to some idealogy or “truth” get in the way of what’s actually useful for your life?

Jesse Elder is a fascinating man. His inspired, and improvised, mind-vitamin wisdom videos have been viewed by over 60 million people across the social media world.
Jesse’s background is in martial arts where he honed much of his embodied wisdom through decades of training and teaching and fighting in actual hand-to-hand combat, in both official martial arts competitions but also in underground fight-club like experiences where men fought for the win with no protective gear, no weight classes, and no rules, save I’m guessing for no death grip moves on each other. In this conversation, in fact, Jesse tells a powerful story about how getting his head smashed into the pavement at a party after hitting on someone else’s girl early in his martial arts career offered him a powerful lesson in the difference between truthfulness … and usefulness. 
Jesse, also known as the “Time Piercer” for his elastic perspectives of time, exudes the calm presence of a master teacher, and he is a master teacher. After building a multi-million dollar martial arts school franchise, he sold it to a business partner and launched himself full-time into sharing his wisdom through coaching, teaching, speaking, and his mind-vitamin videos.
I believe you’re gonna be deeply served by your time with Jesse Elder and I today, for we talk about the power (and pitfalls) of mindset, simple road maps to living freedom NOW, what it means to not merely face reality but actually create reality, and more.
Definitely stay tuned for Jesse’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:22 ~ Getting angry
8:03 ~ A significant event in Jesse’s early life
13:06 ~ Disempowering thoughts or beliefs in our lives
16:51 ~ Homeschooling and empowering a child
21:36 ~ How to change repetitive thought patterns
26:53 ~ A transcendent experience at 135mph
31:03 ~ What’s true versus what’s useful
36:19 ~ Realizing one is an elder
40:21 ~ The biggest challenge facing men today
42:55 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
43:02 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Question authority
43:52 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Jesse’s father & Mike Kemski
44:55 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Interstellar (Movie)
45:19 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Facebook advertising as a means of scaling sending his message, and booking a first-class, one-way ticket to somewhere I’ve never been.
46:19 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Meditation
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Jesse @ www.JesseElder.com
Jesse’s Mind Vitamin Videos
On Instagram @JesseElderLive
Jesse Elder on Facebook
Jesse’s Prime Light Meditation @ www.JesseElder.com/products/ (note: this is currently a $700 offering. Should Jesse make this available free exclusively to “Men, This Way” listeners – we’re currently waiting to hear back from him on this – we’ll put that new link here. Keep checking back.)
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Bryan Reeves yes 51:28
Whatever You Accomplish, It Will Never Be Enough w/ John Raatz (Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment) (013) https://bryanreeves.com/whatever-you-accomplish-john-raatz-013/ Wed, 20 Mar 2019 00:57:44 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=47005 What is your relationship to fear? Is there a way to overcome fear to help you make better decisions? How do you know what to say yes to, or no to, in a WORLD full of distractions and demands? John Raatz is one of the most fascinating people I’ve ever met. We first connected in ... <a title="Whatever You Accomplish, It Will Never Be Enough w/ John Raatz (Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment) (013)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/whatever-you-accomplish-john-raatz-013/" aria-label="More on Whatever You Accomplish, It Will Never Be Enough w/ John Raatz (Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment) (013)">Read more</a> What is your relationship to fear? Is there a way to overcome fear to help you make better decisions? How do you know what to say yes to, or no to, in a WORLD full of distractions and demands? John Raatz is one of the most fascinating people I’ve ever ... What is your relationship to fear?
Is there a way to overcome fear to help you make better decisions?
How do you know what to say yes to, or no to, in a WORLD full of distractions and demands?

John Raatz is one of the most fascinating people I’ve ever met.
We first connected in 2010, through his organization, The Global Alliance for Transformational Entertainment, (also known as GATE).
I was immediately enrolled by John’s massive vision to ignite the spirit of transformational story-telling in mainstream Hollywood. You know, bring back to story-telling what it’s been for thousands of years – not a way to make money, but a way to diffuse wisdom throughout the community, so that we may live well.
Alongside legions of others who were likewise enraptured by John’s vision and passion, I helped John produce these marathon GATE events attended by a diverse world of celebrities, artists, hollywood execs, renowned spiritual teachers, and thought leaders. Those events were famous – or perhaps infamous – for running into the wee hours of the morning, the stage was like a clown car overrun by John’s rolodex of visionary artists, celebrities, entertainers, and storytellers. People like Eckhart Tolle, Jim Carrey, Melissa Etheridge, Marianne Williamson, Annie Lennox and so many others … they were all there, in the audience, and on stage, talking beautiful possibilities for humanity … Truly, those days working with John, and GATE, are among my favorite memories of my years in Los Angeles.
Seriously, John is an extraordinary man … he has had his tireless creative hands on just about every project in the transformational entertainment universe, from the mind-bending movie “Mindwalk” which blew my young mind in 1990, to “What the Bleep do We Know” which blew my slightly older mind – and millions of other minds – in 2004, to Eckhart Tolle’s “Power of Now,” which John helped make an international best-seller … and which always blows my ageless mind in the present moment … If you were to scroll through John’s CV, you would surely discover that you too have been inspired at some point in your life by something John was involved with.
Today, among still countless endeavors, John is the advisor to actor Jim Carrey.
I’m genuinely a big fan of John as a man. In addition to kind and humble, he is a fascinating study in the potential of the human spirit to dream up possibilities AND then take action to make them reality.
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
9:51 ~ A significant early experience in John’s life
12:16 ~ How early exposure to spiritual literature infiltrated John’s work
15:22 ~ John’s relationship with fear
21:48 ~ How John’s relationship with his father shaped his life
27:42 ~ Disappointment and failure within John’s spiritual practice
31:36 ~ Evolution of love in intimate relationships
32:59 ~ The most important insight around creating a truly fulfilling intimate relationship
33:57 ~ The difference between listening and hearing
39:16 ~ How life is made richer through friendships with men
44:51 ~ The biggest challenge facing men today
48:57 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
49:37 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Understanding that the world is as we are
50:57 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Eckhart Tolle
52:13 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast):
“ If You Want to Write: A Book about Art, Independence and Spirit” by Brenda Ueland (Book)
“The Gift” by Lewis Hyde (Book)
53:47 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Spending money on his wife,
Yoko
55:33 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening):
Meditation
The true practice of gratitude
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Search online for “John Raatz” to find John Raatz! His website www.JohnRaatz.com is not yet ready.]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:01:02
Why You Need Mentors w/ Satyen Raja (012) https://bryanreeves.com/you-need-mentors-satyen-raja-012/ Wed, 13 Mar 2019 05:36:31 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46994 Why are teachers/mentors ESSENTIAL for a man to live well? Why must a great leader first know how to be a wise follower? And is the secret to a great relationship … separate bedrooms? In this episode, my guest, Satyen Raja, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights that can make a ... <a title="Why You Need Mentors w/ Satyen Raja (012)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/you-need-mentors-satyen-raja-012/" aria-label="More on Why You Need Mentors w/ Satyen Raja (012)">Read more</a> Why are teachers/mentors ESSENTIAL for a man to live well? Why must a great leader first know how to be a wise follower? And is the secret to a great relationship … separate bedrooms? In this episode, my guest, Satyen Raja, Why are teachers/mentors ESSENTIAL for a man to live well?
Why must a great leader first know how to be a wise follower?
And is the secret to a great relationship … separate bedrooms?

In this episode, my guest, Satyen Raja, and I mine these questions and more for useful insights that can make a difference in your life.
Satyen co-founded, along with his wife Suzanne, the transformational training academy Warrior Sage … what a cool name. Satyen’s work is a living synthesis of eastern wisdom and western practicality, combining the power of the warrior and the wisdom of the sage to lead leaders worldwide into their highest self-knowledge, self-expression and impact.
I actually met Satyen in 2018 at the taping of a talk show on which we were both featured guests, The Dr. Nandi Show, for an episode on Healthy Masculinity. My lady, Silvy, and I, were immediately taken with Satyen’s presence, from the moment we met him in the hotel lobby where we were waiting for someone from the show to pick us up for the taping. Satyen exudes warmth and charisma and caring with a generous spirit that’s infectious. You just feel good in his presence.
I later learned that Satyen is also a long-time student of the author-teacher who changed my life, David Deida. In fact, one thing I love about this interview, is Satyen really demonstrates the value of learning from mentors and teachers in what you’re wanting to succeed at, whether it’s a martial art or business or intimate relationship with another. Satyen shares a particularly striking story in this episode about a profound, transcendent experience he had as a young man, that would have never happened for him, if not for a wise mentor who instructed him to get up at 4am every morning for a time.
This interview was a bit shorter than usual, given Satyen’s tight schedule this day, but we dive into really interesting topics, including surprisingly – didn’t see this coming – but THE BEST, THE MOST WISE insight to the question of whether we should build that damn border wall with Mexico that I’ve ever heard anyone ever say … I think you’re gonna really love his answer, no matter your politics on the issue … and even if you’re listening to this 100 years after this interview. Truly, his answer is timeless wisdom.
We also talk about a surprising practice to maintain a vibrant sexual polarity in a long-term relationship. Satyen’s been with his wife over 30 years, and they’ve been through it all …
And definitely stay tuned for Satyen’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way … Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
10:09 ~ Satyen’s approach to relaxing and chilling out
12:52 ~ Satyen’s approach to discipline and laziness
14:37 ~ An early transcendent experience
17:38 ~ When to lead, and when to follow
21:58 ~ The power of listening in masculine leadership
24:14 ~ Separate bedrooms in a relationship
28:12 ~ The most important thing that men need to know to create a really thriving relationship
30:30 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
40:01 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
40:29 ~ KEY INSIGHT: What must I do today to live, love, and die completely without regret?
42:12 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: David Deida & Stuart Wilde, particularly his book “Infinite Self: 33 Steps to Reclaiming Your Inner Power”
42:59 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “Reality Transurfing” by Vadim Zeland
(Book)
44:24 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Vacation to Hawaii
45:00 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): The question: “What must I do today to live, love,
and die completely without regret?”
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Satyen @ www.WarriorSage.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 48:37
Living at the Edge of Your Truth w/ Mark Groves (011) https://bryanreeves.com/living-at-the-edge-of-your-truth-with-mark-groves-011/ Wed, 06 Mar 2019 19:06:11 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46965 Are you doing work every day of your life that you’re not aligned with? Are you having the uncomfortable conversations you need to be having with the people you love? Do you know how to love without losing yourself? I first met Mark Groves about 7 or 8 years ago in Los Angeles through a ... <a title="Living at the Edge of Your Truth w/ Mark Groves (011)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/living-at-the-edge-of-your-truth-with-mark-groves-011/" aria-label="More on Living at the Edge of Your Truth w/ Mark Groves (011)">Read more</a> Are you doing work every day of your life that you’re not aligned with? Are you having the uncomfortable conversations you need to be having with the people you love? Do you know how to love without losing yourself? Are you doing work every day of your life that you’re not aligned with?
Are you having the uncomfortable conversations you need to be having with the people you love?
Do you know how to love without losing yourself?

I first met Mark Groves about 7 or 8 years ago in Los Angeles through a group of friends doing inspired entrepreneurial work in the world.
At the time, Mark was going through a massive transition in his life, having ended both a marriage engagement to his long-time girlfriend and also his 14-year career as a well-paid pharmaceutical sales rep. He was experiencing a deeper awakening that forced him to acknowledge his choices were no longer in alignment with what he was discovering about himself, and his courageous choice to stop living out of integrity with his deeper truths – like all courageous choices – quickly flung him off the cliff into a holy shit freefall of total uncertainty and deep identity crisis.
If you’ve ever experienced that – as I did when I left the military at 26 with no idea where to go from there – it’s all “what the hell am I supposed to do now?” and “who am I if I’m not my work and my relationship?” … which can be terrifying to the mind that craves certainty.
But once Mark found some solid footing on his new path, which did take some years of searching and deep inquiry and the courageous willingness to STAY in the unknown, his work, his presence exploded onto the social media scene, particularly on Instagram, where he now has over a quarter million engaged readers on his popular page, CreateTheLove.
Mark left a lasting impression on me the first time I met him. He was humble, sincere, and just easy to be around. I also found myself laughing a lot in his presence. I loved reconnecting with Mark through this episode, and I again laughed a lot, because even as we dive deep, he brings his sense of humor with him. Mark shares a lot about his journey through leaving work he didn’t love, leaving a relationship that didn’t fit, and the joys and challenges he’s experienced since in creating a beautiful relationship with his partner, Kylie Macbeath, another inspiring, and beloved-by-many Instagram blogger. I’m really excited to share this raw, honest conversation full of Mark’s hard-earned insights and wisdom with you.
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
7:43 ~ Mark’s past as a pharmaceutical sales rep, and the turning point that led to him leaving it
10:32 ~ Being in the unknown
17:43 ~ Partners aiding in growth
21:56 ~ Intimacy and connection
24:16 ~ The importance of support for individuals in a relationship
26:53 ~ The most important thing a man must learn to do intimate relationships well
36:46 ~ Men and boundaries
45:54 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
50:22 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
51:13 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Make staying connected to people the most important thing
52:25 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Alan Watts (Philosopher)
53:16 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “Codependent No More” by Melody Beattie (Book)
54:42 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Going to conferences on personal growth and training each year Training program with Dr Joe Dispenza on Changing Beliefs
56:52 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Meditation – Insight Timer App
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Mark @ www.MarkGroves.tv
The Mark Groves Podcast
yes 1:01:58
The Power of Allowing w/ Ash Ruiz (010) https://bryanreeves.com/the-power-of-allowing-with-ash-ruiz-010/ Wed, 27 Feb 2019 08:06:37 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46950 Does “inner freedom” seem to elude you, always just outside your reach no matter what you do? Did you know the worst thing that can happen to you is just a thought? Did you know all that clarity you seek … you already have? Ash Ruiz is a fascinating human being. As a teenager, he ... <a title="The Power of Allowing w/ Ash Ruiz (010)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/the-power-of-allowing-with-ash-ruiz-010/" aria-label="More on The Power of Allowing w/ Ash Ruiz (010)">Read more</a> Does “inner freedom” seem to elude you, always just outside your reach no matter what you do? Did you know the worst thing that can happen to you is just a thought? Did you know all that clarity you seek … you already have? Does “inner freedom” seem to elude you, always just outside your reach no matter what you do?
Did you know the worst thing that can happen to you is just a thought?
Did you know all that clarity you seek … you already have?

Ash Ruiz is a fascinating human being.
As a teenager, he was a member of the latin boy band, Menudo, one of the most successful music groups in history.
Ash is also one of my dearest friends, and a man whose presence in my life changed everything.
I met Ash in Miami, in 2005, and soon after spent about 6 years managing his wildly talented and inspiring music band, Here II Here, which he formed with 4 other talented men and musicians a few years after leaving Menudo … but he did something else wild and fascinating after Menudo, before Here II Here.
When all his fellow Menuditos, like Ricky Martin, were working to uplevel their fame with solo albums and soap opera appearances, Ash quietly left the spotlight and went to the jungles of Peru for a few years, where he met that pungent shamanic medicine jungle brew, ayahuasca, which ripped his eyes and heart wide open to deeper spiritual truths beneath twinkling star-studded flying-saucer skies.
In fact, you should go listen to
Here II Here (on spotify) and Ash’s music (here) because his music, like his everyday being, which you’ll meet in a moment, is DRENCHED with the spirit of Ash’s awakening experiences.
I had the great privilege of touring with Ash and the band all over North America for 12 months in 2009 and 10 in a Dodge Durango SUV hauling a 12-foot trailer full of instruments, CDs, and dreams. We performed over 150 concerts in 80+ cities where we slept in the homes of countless fans who gave us not just beds and living room floors and couches and backyard tents and once even a barn to sleep in, but they gave us so much love, too … Ash’s and Here II Here’s songs, their talent for making inspired music come alive on stage, enraptured and inspired everyone who fortunate to experience them during their 14 year run. We heard stories of fans playing their music when birthing their children, and one fan played their song, Holy, on his deathbed, with his family surrounding him, as he transitioned from this life into the next.
Through his music, his presence, his being, and especially his laughter which you’ll get to experience in this fun, inspired conversation, Ash has been a profound gift in my life. He’s the guru I never wanted, but so glad I had, because his influence runs throughout my life’s work as a thriving life coach to men, women, and couples, particularly in my emphasis on learning to see EVERYTHING that happens around us not as something happening TO us, but rather something that is always happening FOR our benefit, even if we can’t yet see it.
I’m super excited to share Ash’s presence and wit and wisdom with you.
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
15:04 ~ A significant experience in Ash’s early life
20:30 ~ “The worst thing that can ever happen to me is just a thought”
23:33 ~ Not buying into what “has to” happen
26:37 ~ The experience of Here II Here’s breakup despite great expectations
31:13 ~ Ash’s ayahuasca journey to the jungles of Peru
35:40 ~ Contentment vs. achievement
37:01 ~ Love and personal boundaries
41:05 ~ “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”
43:25 ~ What men need to know to have fulfilling intimate relationships
45:54 ~ The power of willingness
49:28 ~ Finding the third way
51:07 ~ Favorite memories of touring with Here II Here
55:12 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
55:38 ~ KEY INSIGHT: You are not your thoughts
]]> Bryan Reeves yes 1:06:56 The Emotionally Unavailable Man w/ Jayson Gaddis (009) https://bryanreeves.com/the-emotionally-unavailable-man-with-jayson-gaddis-009/ Wed, 20 Feb 2019 17:28:46 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46943 Do you know what “emotionally unavailable” actually means? Do you know why it’s so destructive to intimacy – and a man’s life, in general? Do you know how easy it is for a man to say – even believe! – he’s both feet into a relationship with only one foot actually in? If you’ve never ... <a title="The Emotionally Unavailable Man w/ Jayson Gaddis (009)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/the-emotionally-unavailable-man-with-jayson-gaddis-009/" aria-label="More on The Emotionally Unavailable Man w/ Jayson Gaddis (009)">Read more</a> Do you know what “emotionally unavailable” actually means? Do you know why it’s so destructive to intimacy – and a man’s life, in general? Do you know how easy it is for a man to say – even believe! – he’s both feet into a relationship with only one fo... Do you know what “emotionally unavailable” actually means?
Do you know why it’s so destructive to intimacy – and a man’s life, in general?
Do you know how easy it is for a man to say – even believe! – he’s both feet into a relationship with only one foot actually in?

If you’ve never heard of Jayson Gaddis, it’s only because you’ve never thought to actually learn how intimate relationships can work.
As my own relationship coaching practice began to take off a few years ago, people started telling me about this guy named Jayson Gaddis, that I needed to look into him. When I began my relationship with my fiance, herself a marriage and family therapist, she would mention his name and his podcast, the Smart Couple, as a great resource with practical tools for couples.
Jayson’s name followed me like my shadow. And with good reason.
Although we’ve never met in person, I decided to invite Jayson onto “Men, This Way” when I learned he was teaching relationship courses to high school students. I mean, in addition to his Relationship School, his own podcast, his therapy and coaching practice,  teaching relationship skills to high school students struck me as both incredibly important – surely more so than trigonometry or chemistry, since we ALL do relationships but so few of us are astrophysicists or whatever the hell chemistry majors do – but it also struck me as potentially futile, because at that age, aren’t we far more influenced by what we SEE and EXPERIENCE at home and in the world around us than by what someone teaches us in a classroom for a few hours?
Still, Jayson’s been doing this work for a while, he’s successfully married – by which I don’t just mean still together with his wife, but thriving in relationship with her – and he’s got two kids. And he’s brutally honest about how actually screwing up past relationships has helped shape him as a powerful healer and leader in this space, for both men and women.
So if there’s anyone who’s going to teach teenagers how to do relationship well? It’s Jayson Gaddis.
In this conversation, Jayson shares a surprising detail about that work, but more so we explore emotional unavailability, as well as practices for men to be more self-aware so we can be more emotionally present. And definitely stay tuned for Jayson’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of “Men, This Way” …
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
7:49 ~ A significant early experience in Jayson Gaddis’ life
12:41 ~ Shutting down vulnerability as man
13:58 ~ Teaching relationship courses to teenagers
17:08 ~ One of the greatest gifts we can offer as a holder of another’s experience
20:49 ~ Balancing focusing on outcomes and being present with your loved ones
25:05 ~ One offering for creating a truly fulfilling intimate relationship
26:57 ~ Being responsible for your partner’s nervous system
29:26 ~ Realizing how fear plays out in a relationship, and having one foot in instead of two
33:17 ~ Understanding how if one does not show up consistently for a relationship, it will end
36:27 ~ Intimacy is a value
40:05 ~ The greatest challenge facing men in the world today
41:49 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
42:26 ~ KEY INSIGHT:
Your past relationship pain will follow you unless you deal with it
44:00 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM:
Dr John D. Martini polymath teacher on money, relationships, fulfillment, and more
45:20 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast):
Movie: Free Solo;
Book: “Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain” by Daniel J. Siegel;
Book: “Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind” by Yuval Noah Harari
Podcast: How I Built This with Guy Raz
46:57 ~ KEY INVESTMENT:
Family trip to Vancouver
48:12 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to listeners):
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 54:36
How to Shift from Anger to Love w/ Preston Smiles (008) https://bryanreeves.com/how-to-shift-from-anger-to-love-with-preston-smiles-008/ Wed, 13 Feb 2019 06:08:52 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46916 What is this thing called LOVE … really all about? How do you know when you’re being genuinely loving … versus just being an arrogant self-righteous ass?  Also, do men, CAN men, actually have NEEDS in a relationship? If so, why do we so often fail to own them? In the last few years, Preston ... <a title="How to Shift from Anger to Love w/ Preston Smiles (008)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/how-to-shift-from-anger-to-love-with-preston-smiles-008/" aria-label="More on How to Shift from Anger to Love w/ Preston Smiles (008)">Read more</a> What is this thing called LOVE … really all about? How do you know when you’re being genuinely loving … versus just being an arrogant self-righteous ass?  Also, do men, CAN men, actually have NEEDS in a relationship? If so, What is this thing called LOVE … really all about?
How do you know when you’re being genuinely loving … versus just being an arrogant self-righteous ass? 
Also, do men, CAN men, actually have NEEDS in a relationship? If so, why do we so often fail to own them?

In the last few years, Preston Smiles’ global presence has exploded, as both he and his wife, Alexi Panos, have become social media darling superstars thanks to the vibrant and colorful messages of love and healing they share with millions of people all over the world through their inspiring books, workshops, videos, and more.
Although we’ve met a number of times – actually, my fiance, Silvy Khoucasian, knew Preston personally long before she and I met – this is the first time we’ve been able to have a substantial conversation.
And I wanted to have a substantial conversation and get REAL with Preston about what is LOVE. After all, he’s a self-proclaimed “Messenger of Love.”
But I’ve personally had a few awful experiences with other so-called “messengers of love,” and seen firsthand it’s way too easy to justify treating people terribly when you believe what you’re doing, you’re doing out of love.
Like a parent who beats their child thinking it’s for the kid’s own good. Or a partner who criticizes you thinking they’re just trying to make you a better person.
Where’s the distinction between love and abuse?
So Preston and I talk about what it looks like to LIVE with a big-view spiritual perspective of oneness and connection and everything is Love … while simultaneously understanding and embracing our HUMANNESS, which means recognizing how we can hurt people, and some things we can do to prevent ourselves from merely perpetuating more hurt and pain.
Actually, I really appreciate Preston’s candor in today’s conversation about how he struggles to be present with his partner when his brain has just flipped into fight or flight mode – in his case fight mode – when he’s just heard some perceived criticism of his character.
That’s a big one for me, too, and if you’ve ever experienced that, definitely listen to the end of this podcast. Because we give you some practices you can do to get yourself out of that threat mode, so fights end faster, and you get back to simply LOVING each other again.
And stay tuned for Preston’s 5 Key Takeaways at the end. I especially liked the key practice he recommends for the next 7 days.
Alright … let’s dive
SHOW NOTES
12:31 ~ What does “Amplifying Love” mean?
15:06 ~ Knowing when you are being a presence of love (vs. an arrogant ass)
17:55 ~ The distinction between the spiritual and human aspects of love
19:58 ~ Addressing men’s programming
22:17 ~ Depictions of relationship in media
22:41 ~ “Power with” versus “power over”
26:24 ~ Being in fight-or-flight mode and how to handle it
32:06 ~ Changing your state
37:16 ~ Considering life’s seasons in relationships
40:06 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
41:54 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
42:33 ~ KEY INSIGHT:
Success is sequential not simultaneous
44:42 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM:
Michael Beckwith (Author, Minister)
Bob Marley (Musician)
Preston Smiles
45:51 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast):
“The One Thing” by Gary Keller (Book)
“Conversations with God” (Book One, Two, and Three) by Neale Donald Walsch (Book)
“The 10X Rule: The Only Difference Between Success and Failure” by Grant Cardone (Book)
The Bridge Experience (www.BridgeExperience.com) – Workshops presented by Preston Smiles and Alexi Panos
47:12 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000):
Hiring an integrator (or an assistant … someone who can do all the businessy-things you don’t want to do!]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 54:14
Why Uncomfortable Conversations Will Enrich Your Life w/ Connor Beaton, Mantalks Founder (007) https://bryanreeves.com/why-uncomfortable-conversations-will-enrich-your-life-with-connor-beaton-mantalks-founder-007/ Wed, 06 Feb 2019 17:48:51 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46900 Why is it important for a man to be open and honest about his personal challenges, what he’s really going through in his work, his relationships, his life … especially with other men? When we hide what we’re going through behind a facade of invulnerability, what’s the cost to our lives, our intimate relationships, our ... <a title="Why Uncomfortable Conversations Will Enrich Your Life w/ Connor Beaton, Mantalks Founder (007)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/why-uncomfortable-conversations-will-enrich-your-life-with-connor-beaton-mantalks-founder-007/" aria-label="More on Why Uncomfortable Conversations Will Enrich Your Life w/ Connor Beaton, Mantalks Founder (007)">Read more</a> Why is it important for a man to be open and honest about his personal challenges, what he’s really going through in his work, his relationships, his life … especially with other men? When we hide what we’re going through behind a facade of invulnerabi... Why is it important for a man to be open and honest about his personal challenges, what he’s really going through in his work, his relationships, his life … especially with other men?
When we hide what we’re going through behind a facade of invulnerability, what’s the cost to our lives, our intimate relationships, our vitality as Men?

I met Connor Beaton a few years ago at an event his organization, ManTalks, was putting on in Los Angeles, right when I was in the middle of a 3-week breakup with my girlfriend. I was just being gutted by that experience, and going to Connor’s event – being around inspiring, inspired men, having honest conversations about our experience as men … was so helpful to me in navigating that painful experience.
Fortunately she and I got back together a few weeks later – she’s now my fiance – and I also felt like I’d found a new friend in Connor.
Since then, I’ve become a big Connor Beaton fan. His TedX talk on masculinity is one of my all-time favorites of any Tedx or TED talk. It’s brilliant, and will probably make you cry … and you should go watch it – AFTER this podcast.
Mantalks is an international organization focused on men’s health, wellness, success, and fulfillment. And I believe one of the most challenging works any man can give himself to in this world is work that supports other men to get honest with themselves, to take real responsibility for their lives, including our messes and mess-ups, and learn how to be truly vulnerable in powerful ways that stop perpetuating darkness and insanity, but rather lift and light up our world, the world, and everyone in it. I know because I’m attempting that work. So is Connor … and big time.
As I was preparing for this interview, reading everything I could about him, I actually had a moment of despair, because it occurred to me that he’s already doing so much to support men on their journey to being better husbands, fathers, leaders, so maybe I should just stick to focusing on supporting women and couples … or just go find other work altogether!
But I took a few deep breaths and got over it, because truth is, we can’t possibly have too many men doing work to support other men, and what followed was a truly inspiring conversation between us that I’m honored and excited to share with you … Be sure to stay for Connor’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way…
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
9:39 ~ Where is Connor Beaton challenged in his life right now?
12:45 ~ Grieving in transitionary periods in life
14:14 ~ Defining ourselves in terms of our outer reality
22:11 ~ What brought Connor to this work?
24:23 ~ The one rule of men
26:33 ~ How Connor’s life is made richer through his relationships with other men
31:41 ~ Men thriving off of battle and challenge
36:19 ~ What men have to celebrate about being a man today
37:02 ~ Power over versus power with
40:40 ~ The biggest challenge facing men today
48:41 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
49:16 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Strive for internal validation
51:19 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Carl Jung, Father of Analytical Psychology
Anthony De Mello, Jesuit Priest and Psychotherapist
52:41 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast):
Book: “Awareness” by Anthony De Mello
Podcast: ManTalks Podcast – Mantalks Podcast Episode with Beau Lotto
54:40 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Audible – audiobook app
Meditation coach or program
56:53 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening):
Cold showers
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 1:03:03
Relaxing into (True) Freedom w/ GuruViking aka Steve James (006) https://bryanreeves.com/relaxing-into-true-freedom-with-guruviking-aka-steve-james-006/ Wed, 30 Jan 2019 17:04:54 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46886 What is the actual point (and benefit) of meditation? Are intimate relationships always going to feel burdensome? How can we men ever experience true freedom amidst life’s endless challenges? Steve James is a wise man. I’ve known Steve personally for a few years. He’s been my teacher, my coach, and as a man I just ... <a title="Relaxing into (True) Freedom w/ GuruViking aka Steve James (006)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/relaxing-into-true-freedom-with-guruviking-aka-steve-james-006/" aria-label="More on Relaxing into (True) Freedom w/ GuruViking aka Steve James (006)">Read more</a> What is the actual point (and benefit) of meditation? Are intimate relationships always going to feel burdensome? How can we men ever experience true freedom amidst life’s endless challenges? Steve James is a wise man. What is the actual point (and benefit) of meditation?
Are intimate relationships always going to feel burdensome?
How can we men ever experience true freedom amidst life’s endless challenges?

Steve James is a wise man. I’ve known Steve personally for a few years. He’s been my teacher, my coach, and as a man I just really like being around, I’m going to claim him as my friend, too.
I’ve led an extraordinary life, and I’m envious of Steve’s extraordinary life!
Growing up on the windswept Shetland Islands off the northern-most coast of Scotland, in his teens Steve was apprenticed to a Christian mystic from the Celtic tradition of Christianity, which launched him into years of deep, personal inquiry and practice around various forms of prayer, contemplation, meditation, textual study, and service.
Much like mine, Steve’s path of investigating the human experience is through his own direct experience. He’s explored the limits of physical and psychological performance through his fascination with extreme outdoor survival expeditions, including arctic survival training in the boreal forests of northern Sweden, where daytime temperatures reach highs of only -24°C.
When I learned that Steve had also toured internationally as a guitarist and musical director with multiple #1 best-selling pop artists out of the UK, well, I found the parallel to my own former life as an indie band manager both curious and delightful.
There’s so much to say about Steve’s experience; I feel very much a kindred spirit with this man, whom one of his many fans described as “the human, fiery bearded re-incarnation of Yoda.” … and he does totally have a Yoda with a British accent thing going on. Steve’s work is full of the embrace of paradox, which I’ve discovered is an essential practice on the quest to living a truly masterful life, for not just surviving but actually thriving in intimate relationship, and for simply feeling alive.
We talk about the living practice of paradox – and more – in this episode of “Men, This Way.”
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
8:04 ~ A significant early experience in Steve James’ life
15:50 ~ How a near-death experience continues to inform Steve’s life
20:15 ~ What men should know about intimate relationships
22:57 ~ Your purpose for having a relationships and how that will not always be met
26:08 ~ Examining our assumptions about relationships
27:26 ~ The importance of feeling our emotions and feelings in our body
36:13 ~ The profundity of meditation
46:22 ~ Pushing to “the edge”
50:23 ~ One of Steve’s “edges”
55:25 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
56:08 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Find your own insight
57:14 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Bruce Lee, particularly his book “Tao of Jeet Kune Do”
58:28 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Book: Michaela Boehm’s “The Wild
Woman’s Way: Unlock Your Full Potential for Pleasure, Power, and Fulfillment”
59:48 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Tibetan language lessons
1:01:21 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): 5 minutes of mindfulness
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
www.guruviking.com
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Bryan Reeves yes 1:06:11
Being a True Leader Means Being Able to Shut Up and Listen (Especially in Intimacy) w/ Joshua Hathaway (005) https://bryanreeves.com/being-a-true-leader-means-being-able-to-shut-up-and-listen-especially-in-intimacy-with-joshua-hathaway-005/ Wed, 23 Jan 2019 09:45:37 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46876 Do you communicate clearly with your partner? … Are you sure? Do you even know what your partner is asking for, when they’re asking you to listen? Do you know what TRUE MASCULINE LEADERSHIP is? I first experienced Joshua Hathaway one evening in Los Angeles when he was leading a workshop for men. I remember ... <a title="Being a True Leader Means Being Able to Shut Up and Listen (Especially in Intimacy) w/ Joshua Hathaway (005)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/being-a-true-leader-means-being-able-to-shut-up-and-listen-especially-in-intimacy-with-joshua-hathaway-005/" aria-label="More on Being a True Leader Means Being Able to Shut Up and Listen (Especially in Intimacy) w/ Joshua Hathaway (005)">Read more</a> Do you communicate clearly with your partner? … Are you sure? Do you even know what your partner is asking for, when they’re asking you to listen? Do you know what TRUE MASCULINE LEADERSHIP is? I first experienced Joshua Hathaway one evening in Los Ang... Do you communicate clearly with your partner? … Are you sure?
Do you even know what your partner is asking for, when they’re asking you to listen?
Do you know what TRUE MASCULINE LEADERSHIP is?

I first experienced Joshua Hathaway one evening in Los Angeles when he was leading a workshop for men. I remember feeling so awake in my spirit and alive in my body by the end of that evening, because Joshua wove in the severely overlooked need of adult men to be PLAYFUL together .. and so we played a lot that evening, and man it was so refreshing. Because I’m way too serious, way too often.
Although I haven’t known him long, since that workshop I’ve been captivated by Joshua’s presence, and his ability to hold the attention of men, to inspire men to deeper connection with themselves, and from there, with others. I wouldn’t describe Joshua as confident. I would describe him AS the personification of confidence, itself.
Joshua is also the founder of the company actually called, “No Bullsh!t Communication,” through which he offers private and organizational trainings, as well as coaching and consulting.
The core of Joshua’s work, which I so appreciate given the coaching work I do with couples, is helping people create real, meaningful connection.
In this conversation, we dive into communication in relationships, the true role of masculine leadership (hint: shut up and listen), and so much more.
Definitely stay tuned for Joshua’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of “Men, This Way.”
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:11 ~ A formative event in Joshua’s life as a man
8:21 ~ The importance of deeply connected, intimate male bonds and friendships
10:05 ~ Male vulnerability in relationships and taking ownership
13:20 ~ The difference between the story and the phenomenon
20:22 ~ How Joshua learnt the difference between truth and stories
25:26 ~ Listening, and the difference between validation and agreement
30:28 ~ How becoming a father changed Joshua’s life
35:02 ~ Leaders take responsibility and do what need to be done
36:34 ~ Something truly terrifying that Joshua has done
38:29 ~ When to say yes, and when to say no
42:45 ~ Men and their relationship with what they want
44:17 ~ The shadow implications of men not pursuing what they want
45:13 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
49:14 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
50:39 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Shut up and listen
51:27 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: David Schnarch (psychotherapist), particularly his book “Passionate Marriage”
52:21 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): “Non-Violent Communication” (book) by Marshall Rosenburg
52:17 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Black foam roller
54:20 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Daily self-affirmations
OTHER LINKS AND RESOURCES
Find Joshua @ www.MasterYourBullshit.com
As well as The Brotherhood Community @ www.BrotherhoodCommunity.com
]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 59:58
Stop Chasing Success (Money) Have Fun Instead with CEO Ajit Nawalkha (004) https://bryanreeves.com/stop-chasing-success-money-have-fun-instead-with-ceo-ajit-nawalkha-004/ Wed, 16 Jan 2019 17:50:20 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46839 Are you stuck in work overwhelm, living to work rather than working to simply enjoy life? Do you know how to stay true to yourself and STILL create a fulfilling intimate relationship? Are you aware how you need an encouraging support crew of men you can be vulnerable with … for the sake of your ... <a title="Stop Chasing Success (Money) Have Fun Instead w/ CEO Ajit Nawalkha (004)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/stop-chasing-success-money-have-fun-instead-with-ceo-ajit-nawalkha-004/" aria-label="More on Stop Chasing Success (Money) Have Fun Instead w/ CEO Ajit Nawalkha (004)">Read more</a> Are you stuck in work overwhelm, living to work rather than working to simply enjoy life? Do you know how to stay true to yourself and STILL create a fulfilling intimate relationship? Are you aware how you need an encouraging support crew of men you ca... Are you stuck in work overwhelm, living to work rather than working to simply enjoy life?
Do you know how to stay true to yourself and STILL create a fulfilling intimate relationship?
Are you aware how you need an encouraging support crew of men you can be vulnerable with … for the sake of your intimate relationship?

Ajit Nawalkha’s story is fairytale-like. He grew up in Jaipur, India – in the northern state of Rajasthan in a small home crowded with 23 family members. From Rajasthan, which means the Land of Kings, Life took Ajit on an adventure through the realms of business, marketing, and publishing, across the Bay of Bengal and the Andaman Sea to Malaysia and Kuala Lumpur, where he quickly rose to become, by his early 30s, the CEO of Mindvalley, an innovative and exciting transformational education company that has trained millions of people around the world in the exploding realm of human potential. I met Ajit a year ago, through his wife, my old friend, the brilliant and talented in her own right, Neeta Bhushan Nawalkha. Despite his remarkable rise from humble beginnings to become a King among thought leader Kings, Ajit carries himself with such an unassuming presence; he’s calm and cool in a way that tells you everything is going to be ok.
Ajit is also the co-founder of Evercoach, an incredible training experience for coaches that helped fundamentally reshape my own coaching practice back in 2015 when Evercoach was launched, in ways that continue to make a massive difference for me, and for my clients.
Be sure to stay for Ajit’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:09 ~ The most surprising part of becoming a father
7:24 ~ The shift that takes place when becoming a parent
11:06 ~ A formative event in Ajit’s early life
15:18 ~ His start on the path of abundance
16:30 ~ His journey to where he is now, and what helped him overcome fears in taking action
19:58 ~ Asking tough questions when planning for achieving abundance
22:00 ~ “The point of music is discovered in every moment of playing and listening to it. It is the same, I feel, with the greater part of our lives, and if we are unduly absorbed in improving them we may forget altogether to live them.” – Alan Watts
22:26 ~ Watching 4 hours of Netflix a day and being deliberate with work
23:44 ~ Don’t work because you have to
26:18 ~ The impact of male family members and mentors in Ajit’s development
28:55 ~ The importance of sharing between men
31:29 ~ Regular meetings with other men to keep space for raising issues
34:32 ~ Knowledge for intimate relationships
37:21 ~ The power of reflection and transformation in relationships
38:34 ~ The importance of individuality
40:05 ~ Maintaining, not resolving tension
41:55 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
45:55 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
46:36 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Take a break and find yourself
47:06 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: Ajit’s father, Bryan Reeves, Vishen Lakhiani, Tony Robbins
47:34 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Stealing Fire (Book)
48:16 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Mind Valley’s A-Fest: www.afest.com
48:54 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): When triggered, lean into the conversation and talk through it.
RESOURCES
Ajit’s Book “Live Big” @ www.livebigthebook.com
Ajit on LinkedIn
Ajit on yes 53:29
How Death Opens the Masculine Heart with John Wineland (003) https://bryanreeves.com/how-death-opens-the-masculine-heart-with-john-wineland-003/ Wed, 09 Jan 2019 19:07:56 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46799 Are you still afraid of death? Did you know that emotional presence … that thing women often cite as the reason they don’t trust men … is something you can relax into? And are you aware you can play a significant role in helping your partner heal past traumas? This conversation with John Wineland was ... <a title="How Death Opens the Masculine Heart w/ John Wineland (003)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/how-death-opens-the-masculine-heart-with-john-wineland-003/" aria-label="More on How Death Opens the Masculine Heart w/ John Wineland (003)">Read more</a> Are you still afraid of death? Did you know that emotional presence … that thing women often cite as the reason they don’t trust men … is something you can relax into? And are you aware you can play a significant role in helping your partner heal past ... Are you still afraid of death?
Did you know that emotional presence … that thing women often cite as the reason they don’t trust men … is something you can relax into?
And are you aware you can play a significant role in helping your partner heal past traumas?

This conversation with John Wineland was deeply moving for me, because death was present when he and I spoke.
And death does well to open the masculine heart.
Just a few months earlier, John made an excruciating decision that is every parent’s nightmare – when he took his 21 year old daughter, Claire Wineland, a young lady who was just a light of inspiration in the world, off life support, ending her rollercoaster journey with cystic fibrosis.
Although John shares some of what he’s learning through this painful experience – and it is PROFOUND! – this interview isn’t specifically about that, because John is actually a renowned coach and teacher who travels world-wide, teaching his vision of embodied men’s work and deep relational practice for couples. He’s been leading men’s groups for decades, and is also a long-time student of author David Deida, the man whose teachings completely changed the way I see the world, and understand myself, and women, forever.
John writes extensively about Masculine Leadership, and you can catch him throughout Europe and the U.S. leading workshops on embodied men’s work, spiritual intimacy and sexual practice.
Definitely stay tuned for john’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way.
Alright … Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
6:46 ~ Fundamental events in John’s early life
9:02 ~ The role of mentors in John’s life and the amazing friends he has as his support network
11:11 ~ The need to be supported by other men when going through difficult times
12:30 ~ The passing of Claire Wineland
13:20 ~ What John has learnt from this difficult experience
15:36 ~ Post- and Pre-death lessons
17:56 ~ Why it matters for men to learn to be present with their emotions and thoughts
19:14 ~ How to deal with our emotions with integrity
20:10 ~ Integrity is not just about our word (hint: emotional integrity)
21:44 ~ The role of grieving in our lives and the importance of being open to it
24:31 ~ How as we become more embodied we become more empathetic to those around us
25:03 ~ “Men it’s time to take responsibility for the sins of our fathers and brothers”
27:51 ~ Masculine leadership is about awareness and knowledge of what affects those around us
28:47 ~ How men benefit from taking responsibility and being part of their partners’ healing process, and thus bring great value to their partners
31:01 ~ A core practice for a truly fulfilling, intimate relationship
32:39 ~ “There is one way of breathing that is shameful and constricted. Then there is another way. A breath of love that takes you all the way to infinity.” – Rumi
33:37 ~ The link between sexual yogic practice and martial arts
33:52 ~ Always own the central line
35:26 ~ How to know what to say “Yes” to and what to say “No” to
37:07 ~ How men can benefit from slowing down strategizing and instead just being present
38:12 ~ The relationship between fear and action, and the need for a “container” when experiencing fear
40:35 ~ The biggest challenge facing men in the world today
41:50 ~ “5 KEY TAKEWAYS” FINALE
42:52 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Make death an ally
43:56 ~ KEY MAN TO LEARN FROM: David Deida. Groundbreaking work in relationships.
45:13 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Carlos Castaneda’s books. Journey to Ixtlan in particular.
46:07 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Taking a chance on … (listen to find out)
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Bryan Reeves yes 49:46
Why Commitment Never Works (Only Devotion Does) with Mikki Willis (002) https://bryanreeves.com/commitment-devotion-mikki-willis-002/ Fri, 04 Jan 2019 22:56:53 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46756 What’s the difference between commitment and DEVOTION in relationship? What should a man be teaching his children in today’s chaotic, confusing, rapidly changing world? What do you do when you keep trying and pushing to solve an important problem … yet it just won’t budge? <p class="read-more-container"><a class="button" href="https://bryanreeves.com/commitment-devotion-mikki-willis-002/">Read more</a></p> What should a man be teaching his children in today’s chaotic, confusing, rapidly changing world? What’s the difference between commitment and DEVOTION in relationship?
What should a man be teaching his children in today’s chaotic, confusing, rapidly changing world?
What do you do when you keep trying and pushing to solve an important problem … yet it just won’t budge?
What’s the difference between commitment and DEVOTION in relationship?

Mikki Willis is an award-winning filmmaker, cinematographer, story-teller, and is regarded as a pioneer in the world of transformative media. The founder of Elevate Films, Mikki and his film crews have produced over 400 productions, including network TV shows, movies, commercials, and music videos for multi-platinum artists from the Black Eyed Peas to Alannis Morissette. Mikki was also in New York, inside the twin towers, on the morning of September 11th, 2001, just hours before they went down, and he stayed for 3 days after to help conduct search and rescue efforts.
I first met Mikki in 2011 when I was managing music band, Here II Here, and we performed one evening at an event at Elevate Mansion in Ojai, CA, where Mikki and his crew were both living and making movie magic. It was an unforgettable evening. A few months later, I went to Mikki’s mansion for Thanksgiving dinner, figuring I’d stay a few hours. I didn’t end up leaving for 4 days. I didn’t know I’d just checked in to Hotel California. Nothing in me wanted to leave Mikki’s enchanted world, and it was the last time I went to dinner anywhere in California without a change of underwear in the car.
Since then, Mikki has taught me, personally – and the world through his short videos he regularly posts on facebook with his two young sons and lovely wife, Nadia – about how to create a beautiful, thriving relationship and family. You’ve probably seen the one where his son, all bright eyed and smiley, proudly holds up the barbie doll he just bought at the toy store. Yeah, that video went viral with something like a bazillion views.
Mikki and his family recently lost their home in a massive California wildfire, an excruciating experience he somehow managed to recreate as an inspiration for millions … which is why I invited Mikki to my podcast. Be sure to stay tuned for Mikki’s 5 Key Takeaways at the end of Men, This Way.
Alright …  Let’s dive …
SHOW NOTES
5:00 ~ The best part about being father to two young sons and husband to a beautiful, brilliant ninja-mom woman …
7:20 ~ What a father should be teaching his boys (children) in this confusing, chaotic world …
13:45 ~ A profound life lesson Mikki’s step-father taught him as a kid while Mikki was struggling to fix his bicycle pedal
19:00 ~ The difference between an argument and a fight (with your partner) … and specific language you can use to short-circuit disagreements so you can prevent resentment, stay connected … and MOVE ON!
22:30 ~ What men need to learn to experience/create exquisite relationship
24:30 ~ The profound importance for a Man – even (especially) the “Alpha Male” – to explore his own inner “feminine” essence, to stay connected to his family, his partner, himself.
30:00 ~ Why people get into the wrong relationships.
33:00 ~ Why men wear big expensive watches, drive status cars, etc.
35:00 ~ Inner liberation through welcoming being judged by others.]]>
Bryan Reeves 1:14:33
There's No One Left To Show Us ~ 001 https://bryanreeves.com/theres-no-one-left-to-show-us-podcast-men-this-way-ep-1/ Mon, 24 Dec 2018 07:20:50 +0000 https://bryanreeves.com/?p=46736 In the very last scene of the recent movie epic, Wind River, two men played by actors Jeremy Renner and Gil Birmingham share a brief conversation that pierced me to my core. In this chilling murder-mystery thriller set on a snowy American Indian reservation in Wyoming, Gil’s character is a native american man named, Martin, ... <a title="There’s No One Left To Show Us (001)" class="read-more" href="https://bryanreeves.com/theres-no-one-left-to-show-us-podcast-men-this-way-ep-1/" aria-label="More on There’s No One Left To Show Us (001)">Read more</a> Where are the men who are modeling a Manhood that truly lights up the world, rather than merely adds more confusion, heaviness, division, darkness to it? … They’re on this podcast. In the very last scene of the recent movie epic, Wind River, two men played by actors Jeremy Renner and Gil Birmingham share a brief conversation that pierced me to my core. In this chilling murder-mystery thriller set on a snowy American Indian reservation in Wyoming, Gil’s character is a native american man named, Martin, whose family is just shredded by tragedy throughout the film. In this final scene, we find Gil sitting out back behind his house on the ground beneath an old, rusty swing set, staring icily out at a vast, empty, bleak expanse of Wyoming tundra that clearly mirrors his internal state.
His face is covered in a pasty pattern of sky blue and off white paint.
Jeremy Renner, as wildlife officer Cory, walks up and sits down on the ground beside Martin. The two have been friends a long time, and they share a deeply painful past, having both lost a teenage daughter to the violence of men.
Cory asks his friend, “what’s with the paint?”
Martin replies, ‘It’s my death face.’
Cory presses, ‘And how do you know what that is?’
In a moment of heart-wrenching vulnerability, this strong, proud native american man looks at Cory and responds, “I don’t. I made it up. There’s no one left to teach me.”
Welcome to the podcast, “Men, This Way” … Life Insights from Wise Men.
I’m your host, Bryan Reeves … I created this show because I, too, have for too long felt like there’s no one left to teach me.
Sure, there are countless men – and women – who can show me, or you, how to write a business plan, or ride a motorcycle, or write code, or enter politics, or drink whiskey properly or … start a podcast … but where are the men showing us the way into a mature, wise, disciplined, fierce AND loving, heart-connected Manhood?
In some way, every man on the planet is teaching something, mostly unconsciously and unintentionally, about what it means and looks like to be a man … it’s just … what are most men teaching? Is what we see when we look into the world of men, is that what I and so many men and boys who will become men, really want to learn about being a MAN?
In recent years, it’s become clear to me, that I, and countless men I’ve known both as friends, and also as clients in coaching practice, have spent so much of our lives in deep longing for real connection to wise, elder men, men who can show us more than merely how to make money or score women or win and conquer – in politics, business, sports, war – no matter the cost to others, or ourselves.
Where are such men?
Where is the Man who has grown to embrace ALL the aspects of his inner being – from his ignorance to his brilliance, from his shame to his confidence, from his rage to his joy, from the heavy shadows where his demons hide to his wild, radiant heart that brings blessings into the world …
Where is the Man who no longer needs to exploit others for his own selfish gain, who doesn’t need to work incessantly on his abs, or his stock portfolio, because he’s too afraid to be with Life as it is, and himself, as he is?
Where is the Man who has learned to stay present in relationships, emotionally as much as physically, who knows in his being how to combine discipline and fierceness WITH gentleness and caring, so that his loved ones don’t just respect him, but their lives are made richer in every way by his loving presence.
Where is the man who has discovered his mortality, who knows he is going to die, and rather than be haunted by that and do everything he can to avoid it or distract from it, he’s inspired by it instead, surrendered to simply offering his unique gifts to the world, to his community, to his loved ones, whether that be his wisdom, his insight, his resources, or simply his strong, loving presence … whether or not he gets anything in return for his offering.
Speaking of which … where is the man who knows how to really love.]]>
Bryan Reeves yes 24:48