Stop Seeking Success (Let It Find You, Instead) w/ Sam Ryter (037)

September 19, 2019


Are you “trying too hard” to succeed … Could that be getting in the way of success?

What if “letting go” was the fastest way to the success you dream of?

Could the same hold true for relationship success?

Sam Ryter is actually a former coaching client of mine. We worked together in the first half of 2018, and through our work Sam’s approach to life, to his work, his creativity, and his intimate relationship, changed dramatically.

I invited him onto “Men, This Way” because a few months ago I got an email from him with an update that so deeply touched and inspired me.

He actually proposed coming on to the podcast to share his experience coaching with me and all the magic that’s been happening for him afterwards. I was a bit reluctant at first, not wanting to be overtly promotional with this podcast, but then I realized that the profound transformation Sam has been experiencing in every aspect of his life, is what EVERY MAN – and really EVERY WOMAN, too – is ACHING to experience in their own lives.

Anyway, Sam is just a really likeable, massive-hearted young man.

His story is also reminiscent of my own in many ways … in fact, when we started working together, I kinda felt like I was working with my 25-year old self, which was pretty cool, actually … 

Sam originally came to me to help mentor him in growing his own coaching business. But what actually happened for him through our work together was far more true to the deepest yearnings of his heart. 

But I’ll let Sam tell the tale … 

In this episode we talk about the courageous practice of surrender, of not trying to succeed, but rather just staying focused on giving your deepest gift to the world, with no attachment to outcome, and allowing success to then find you. We also explore what happened for Sam with his intimate partner, and how the awareness of masculine and femine energies completely shifted his experience of relationship … We talk about that – and more … and definitely stay tuned for Sam’s 5 Key Takeaway’s at the end of this episode of Men, This Way …

Finally, if this episode inspires in you the desire to finally work with a mentor, or a coach, yourself, and you think I could be the one to serve you on YOUR journey to creating the life you dream of and were BORN for … email … and let’s explore working together.

Alright …

Let’s dive …


08:04 ~ Sam’s adventures over the last year
11:47 ~ Letting go of agenda in creative work
15:35 ~ The process behind Sam’s novel
20:08 ~ The magic of surrender
24:42 ~ Control and how liberating it is to let go
29:36 ~ The masculine desire for freedom, and the feminine desire for connection
34:55 ~ The paradox of surrender
39:22 ~ The importance of working with a mentor or coach


44:09 ~ KEY INSIGHT: Finding the balance between freedom and connection within a romantic relationship
46:02 ~ KEY MENTOR TO LEARN FROM: Mooji (Jamaican spiritual teacher)
48:26 ~ KEY RESOURCE (most impactful, inspiring book, movie, podcast): Sam’s book “Pico Blanco” available
through Amazon
51:00 ~ KEY INVESTMENT (the best thing you spent money on, under $10,000): Using all his savings to travel to Mexico to write
53:45 ~ KEY PRACTICE (7-day challenge to the men listening): Taking conscious rests, and being lazy when you don’t have to work


Sam’s Website

Explore Private Coaching with Bryan

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