Love

The One Shift in Communication (That Saves Relationships)

The One Shift in Communication (That Saves Relationships)

“When someone comes to you with their pain, they’re not asking you to decide if their experience is valid.” ~ Silvy Khoucasian ♦◊♦ Through all my adventures in intimacy, I spent way too much time evaluating the validity of my partners’ upsets and frustrations – often deciding they are NOT valid, especially when directed at … Read more

We Men Must Learn How to Grieve (Everything)

♦◊♦ In 2010, I spent 12 months in a purple SUV Dodge Durango crisscrossing North America on the most wondrous adventure with five other men, five brilliant musical shamans forever my brothers. That purple Durango – which anyone not color blind (like me) would always insist was blue – held us safe as we made … Read more

A Man Divided Causes Stress In His Partner

Throughout my 20s and 30s, I often stayed in relationships I was deeply divided about staying in. My mouth would make promises my bones knew I couldn’t keep. Which made life awful for any woman who ever tried to love me.

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"I Don’t Want Drama" (Beware Of The Man Who Says This)

When a man (or woman) says “I don’t want drama,” he is essentially saying, “I am terrified of feeling out of control, and I cannot be with anyone who feels feelings or acts in ways that are beyond my current capacity to feel or simply outside my tiny stress-free comfort zone.”

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How to Get a Man Into His Heart

No one ever taught me how to “be in my heart” (or what that even means). My relationships have often suffered horribly as a result. Like most men (many women, too) I’ve been conditioned to live in my head, to use my brain to solve any problem that presents itself.

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