Women Feel Unsafe And It Is Our Fault

“We have to take responsibility for what we are not responsible for.” ~ Robert Moore ~ ♦◊♦ In 2013, I attended a large workshop with 2000-ish people, about half men and women. One day, the facilitator asked this question of the men: “Men, raise your hand if you have felt unsafe at any point during the last week.”

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It’s Healthy For Men To Question Our Sexuality

♦◊♦ When I was 22 and in the US Air Force, I spent 4 months wondering if I was gay. I was stationed in Oklahoma City, deeply unhappy, certain I was supposed to be doing something on the planet far more inspired and evolutionary than learning about avionics systems on 50-year old KC-135 aircraft. Although

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If I Was a Black Man I’d Be Raising Hell Too

“Those caught up in the structures and dynamics of Patriarchy seek to dominate not only women but men as well. Patriarchy is based on fear – the boy’s fear, the immature masculine’s fear – of women, to be sure, but also fear of men. Boys fear women. They also fear real men.” ~ quoted from King

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Hiding Weakness Kills Men

Most men think we have to bear our burdens alone. We don’t confess our worries, our sadnesses, our confusion, our despair. And that kills men.

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6 Things an Evolved Man Wants From a Woman

♦◊♦ Note: As my views on “SURRENDER” continue evolving, I edit this blog to reflect that. Some of the angry comments below reflect an admittedly “less evolved” view of surrender (last edit: 12/5/15). ♦◊♦ I hear women these days talk about wanting an evolved, conscious man. I’ve decided that mostly means they want to be with

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The One Thing Women Are Most Afraid of in Men (It’s Not Aggression)

♦◊♦ I used to think women were only afraid of aggression in men, in all its forms: anger, rage, physical violence, verbal abuse, sexual aggression, rape. I grew up with all kinds of conflicting social messages about the wrongs (and subtle rights) of violence against women. With three sisters and two mothers (married to my

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6 Reasons Why Men Must Give Up Pornography

Note: I do not promote sexual shame or banning porn. This article simply invites men to explore how online pornography can affect the experience and expression of our sexuality. ♦◊♦ In my boyhood teenage days of yore, using pornography required patience, even imagination. One of my early adventures with porn occurred on weekday afternoons when I got

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Men Aren't Supposed to Understand Women

♦◊♦ I’ve finally realized that I’m not supposed to understand my woman. I am only supposed to love her in all her wild mystery. I’m a “core masculine” man. I wouldn’t want to completely understand a woman, anyway. Like most men, once I understand or completely figure something out – or even think I have –

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It's Time to Grow Up (but not Old)

I had two bowls of cereal for dinner the other night. The next morning, I went out and played my worst game of pickup basketball … ever. Afterwards, while I sat dejected on the grassy side of this Santa Monica basketball court overlooking a sun-splashed Pacific Ocean, I posted on Facebook that I’ve decided it’s

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